NSW Child Custody Urgent

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Zangari

Member
26 August 2020
3
0
1
Hi, I removed my 3 year old child from the mother last year due to neglect. A police report was done immediately and FACS was contacted, however FACS did not get involved as there was 1 fit parent. No parenting agreements have ever been in place. I went for legal advice through legal aid and was advised to start mediation. She did not comply and I was issued a section 60i. After being issued the section 60i, I was advised by legal aid order to wait as the longer my child is with me the better it would be for me.

Many months have passed, during this time she has hardly called our daughter and has asked on certain occasion to see her but I was advised by solicitor since I removed my daughter due to neglect it would be best not to give her access because of my concerns of neglect what would that say about my character. Mother has called her once a month the past few months, prior to that every couple of weeks. Lawyer advised that it was now up to the mother to get our daughter back either through mediation or a recovery order at the time (too much time has passed now for her to do a recovery order).

My ex has now contacted mediation and I am lost at what to do next. My daughter has 3 other siblings from my ex's previous relationship. Besides the neglect, which continued to happen after I removed my daughter with the other children, my daughter was exposed to family violence. Shouting, screaming and witness to physical violence from brother to sister, and exposure to psychological abuse. I have a lot of concern in relation to things my family and I have known in the past including sexual abuse between siblings. My ex has a new partner and that's ok but it's the affiliations and the lifestyle that extremely worries me about my daughter spending time with her mother. My ex has also put her other children against their father where its come to the point where they don't want to see him as they have been brainwashed.

I want the best interest for my daughter but how can I give the mother access when I'm so scared that my daughter will be exposed to all this, be told lies and manipulated as she grows up and not be given the best chance at life? I have never said anything negative to my daughter about her mother.

I don't understand why I wasn't advised at the time do to do an urgent application to the court? Everything I have read suggest sole parental responsibility is extremely hard to get. I also want to relocate interstate as I find we around a lot of toxicity and it would be in my daughter's best interest, however the relocation is not the most pressing matter.

Another important point is I've had a very colourful past which I've turned my life around for the better, however I was advised by lawyer is we go to court all this will come out which is fine by me as I've paid my dues and have turned my life around. I got me thinking if this was a scare tactic as I didn't understand if we're going to go to court is it my child's wellbeing that's being considered or my past?

Looking for some clarity.
 
Last edited:

CSFLW

Well-Known Member
LawConnect (LawTap) Verified
24 September 2018
451
29
659
Hello Zangari

Sorry to hear about your circumstances.

There are a lot of issues.

First, given the concerns you raise the mediation centre may not deem this matter appropriate for mediation.

Second, if you want to participate in the mediation you should prepare a list of the issues you want to discuss so that you are prepared for the mediation.

Third, if you are scared about allowing the mother access and wish to move interstate these are issues that can be dealt with by a court (or court order if you both agree to sign a parenting order without going to court).

You should get legal advice before engaging in the mediation as an experienced family lawyer can assist you with the process.

I hope this helps.