Hey Newdad,
I'm just a bloke going through his own mess like you.
With the Initiating paperwork I requested:
My Ex was withholding our young son. Now there are some serious DV problems with my case but never towards the child.
What is written in the family report is extremely important as whatever they recommend is likely what the Judge will go with in the interim.
So if you absoloutley smash the Family Report they will write something like Father is to spend 25 hours a fortnight with the child between the hours of 10am - 3pm and that is what the judge will give you in the interim.
Why wont they give you more time straight away?
Well because the child's young age and the child is in a current routine(second most important word after child safety) and without the threat of immediate harm to the child they wont uproot the child and give him to you more right away.
So you do the family report, get some interim orders and then the ICL will do their research.
They will issue subpoenas for medical and criminal history of you both. They will get all of the police reports, hospital reports and child safety reports. (you will get to see them also as you're self repping)
They don't care about mum or dad they only care about the child.
Work with them professionally do everything they ask and they will do 80% of the talking in court.
If they like you because you're being genuine and mum is being a twit not wanting to co-parent it is likely they will bat in your corner and push for a better deal for you when they can.
As a gesture of good will perhaps offer to do a parenting course such as Parenting Orders Program offered by Uniting care or Relationships Australia (wait time to long).
It's about how to communicate with your Ex despite being separated with a child together. The ICL would be likely to ask for orders for you both to do it anyway.
It's a free 6 week course and will make you look like a good dad that's trying to do the right thing.
They also might ask you to do an anger management course due to all of the yelling etc. Your call on that one.
But without genuine safety concerns for the child be prepared for a loooooong wait.
It will be periods of 4-8 weeks between dates for things you need to do and court appearances. Stay calm, stay focused and don't do anything stupid.
I'm just a bloke going through his own mess like you.
With the Initiating paperwork I requested:
- Family report to be done.
- An Independent children lawyer be appointed for my child
My Ex was withholding our young son. Now there are some serious DV problems with my case but never towards the child.
What is written in the family report is extremely important as whatever they recommend is likely what the Judge will go with in the interim.
So if you absoloutley smash the Family Report they will write something like Father is to spend 25 hours a fortnight with the child between the hours of 10am - 3pm and that is what the judge will give you in the interim.
Why wont they give you more time straight away?
Well because the child's young age and the child is in a current routine(second most important word after child safety) and without the threat of immediate harm to the child they wont uproot the child and give him to you more right away.
So you do the family report, get some interim orders and then the ICL will do their research.
They will issue subpoenas for medical and criminal history of you both. They will get all of the police reports, hospital reports and child safety reports. (you will get to see them also as you're self repping)
They don't care about mum or dad they only care about the child.
Work with them professionally do everything they ask and they will do 80% of the talking in court.
If they like you because you're being genuine and mum is being a twit not wanting to co-parent it is likely they will bat in your corner and push for a better deal for you when they can.
As a gesture of good will perhaps offer to do a parenting course such as Parenting Orders Program offered by Uniting care or Relationships Australia (wait time to long).
It's about how to communicate with your Ex despite being separated with a child together. The ICL would be likely to ask for orders for you both to do it anyway.
It's a free 6 week course and will make you look like a good dad that's trying to do the right thing.
They also might ask you to do an anger management course due to all of the yelling etc. Your call on that one.
But without genuine safety concerns for the child be prepared for a loooooong wait.
It will be periods of 4-8 weeks between dates for things you need to do and court appearances. Stay calm, stay focused and don't do anything stupid.