Hello everyone,
I would like to start by thanking all those that have contributed to this forum and although this is my first post I have read it extensively and it has helped me a lot over the last year.
I have an eight-month-old son with my ex-partner. We started dating and within two weeks she was pregnant. We tried to make it work but the relationship was toxic. The relationship ended when a DVO was brought against me as the result of an argument. I consented without admission to the DVO.
There were no charges brought against me and no conditions or stay away orders put on the DVO, and my ex partner received no injuries and doesn't claim that I assaulted her and this is reflected in the court documents.
After the separation my ex moved interstate back to her family in WA which I don't object to as I wish her to be supported by her family. Approximately 3 months later, she gave birth to our truly beautiful little boy. Since then, it has been a real struggle to gain access among many other things. I have tried mediation twice in which both times my ex walked away from the table despite the fact that I was asking for a very small and reasonable agreement based on the research I have done previously.
There has been a few occasions when my ex has asked that we get back together and when I decline the offer as gently as possible. Everything gets shut down, all communication about our son is blocked and so on. I could write an essay on everything that has happened but I won't put you through that lol.
Perhaps the best way to describe it is that my ex seems to display traits and patterns that resemble some form of personality disorder. It has been a very painful and difficult year but during the relationship, I knew something wasn't right. And after the separation, I started researching immediately and putting into practice the advice from this forum and other resources that I hope will put me into a reasonable legal position in family court.
I have tried hard to avoid having to go to court as it doesn't seem good for anyone but things only seem to be deteriorating over time not getting better. However despite the way that she has treated me, my ex appears on all accounts to be quite a very good mother to our son except in the value she puts on having me in his life.
I have a few questions that I would like to ask:
1) Are there any suggestions for books on self-representation in family court, particularly ones that deal with toxic personalities or difficult custody disputes, as this may very well be my new reality?
2) I am currently a mature aged student at uni and doing quite well. Should I go back to my old job as a landscaper for the immediate money or should I stay with uni for the long term financial stability? I intend to apply for legal aid.
3) Should I file in Qld where I live or WA where she lives? I don't intend to try and make her move back to Qld and don't believe that it would be successful anyway.
4) I have always intended to move to WA to be near my son - should I move before I file or is this something that can be sorted out in court so that I can remain with my support network while going through the process?
5) Any help that people feel might be helpful on other things is welcomed as well. It feels really quite intimidating, the prospect of self representation in family court, particularly as it is almost certain that my ex will have a lawyer.
Thanks for taking the time to read my long post.
I would like to start by thanking all those that have contributed to this forum and although this is my first post I have read it extensively and it has helped me a lot over the last year.
I have an eight-month-old son with my ex-partner. We started dating and within two weeks she was pregnant. We tried to make it work but the relationship was toxic. The relationship ended when a DVO was brought against me as the result of an argument. I consented without admission to the DVO.
There were no charges brought against me and no conditions or stay away orders put on the DVO, and my ex partner received no injuries and doesn't claim that I assaulted her and this is reflected in the court documents.
After the separation my ex moved interstate back to her family in WA which I don't object to as I wish her to be supported by her family. Approximately 3 months later, she gave birth to our truly beautiful little boy. Since then, it has been a real struggle to gain access among many other things. I have tried mediation twice in which both times my ex walked away from the table despite the fact that I was asking for a very small and reasonable agreement based on the research I have done previously.
There has been a few occasions when my ex has asked that we get back together and when I decline the offer as gently as possible. Everything gets shut down, all communication about our son is blocked and so on. I could write an essay on everything that has happened but I won't put you through that lol.
Perhaps the best way to describe it is that my ex seems to display traits and patterns that resemble some form of personality disorder. It has been a very painful and difficult year but during the relationship, I knew something wasn't right. And after the separation, I started researching immediately and putting into practice the advice from this forum and other resources that I hope will put me into a reasonable legal position in family court.
I have tried hard to avoid having to go to court as it doesn't seem good for anyone but things only seem to be deteriorating over time not getting better. However despite the way that she has treated me, my ex appears on all accounts to be quite a very good mother to our son except in the value she puts on having me in his life.
I have a few questions that I would like to ask:
1) Are there any suggestions for books on self-representation in family court, particularly ones that deal with toxic personalities or difficult custody disputes, as this may very well be my new reality?
2) I am currently a mature aged student at uni and doing quite well. Should I go back to my old job as a landscaper for the immediate money or should I stay with uni for the long term financial stability? I intend to apply for legal aid.
3) Should I file in Qld where I live or WA where she lives? I don't intend to try and make her move back to Qld and don't believe that it would be successful anyway.
4) I have always intended to move to WA to be near my son - should I move before I file or is this something that can be sorted out in court so that I can remain with my support network while going through the process?
5) Any help that people feel might be helpful on other things is welcomed as well. It feels really quite intimidating, the prospect of self representation in family court, particularly as it is almost certain that my ex will have a lawyer.
Thanks for taking the time to read my long post.