NSW Help with Lodging an Application in Family Law?

[sammy01]

far from it... Breastfeeding is a great idea, that clearly was the intention. Using breastfeeding as an excuse to keep a 16-month-old child away from dad. Criminal...

Just so we're clear here - this conversation is held within a context where a dad has asked about how to proceed given his ex has shown disdain for the courts. The poor bugger has gone to court, been granted 2 hour visits, supervised. So he has to pay for it.

But mum has said 'nope', an hour is enough. Appalling. Disgusting. Wrong...

Come on ladies, join me in the chant... This woman is in the wrong. Call her out for it.

I totally agree breastfeeding is best... Look back at my post, I'm sure I've used that exact phrase, so clearly when you say that I am holding breastfeeding against women, your assertion is wrong. But it is also best that a child has an opportunity to bond with both parents.

In the event of a relationship breakdown that can't happen in the family home...in such cases, it would be sad to think that a mother might use breastfeeding as an excuse to keep a kid away from their dad. But I'm sure it happens...

Do you wanna enter into an argument with me about the fact that some people will use anything to keep the kid away from the other parent? Accusations of DV? Accusations of sexual abuse? Breastfeeding? You bet it happens...

He has then asked a reasonable question (presumably as a first time dad) about breastfeeding and when it would be reasonable for overnight care to start with consideration of the child's best interests while being mindful that the child may still be getting breastfed... 16 months seems pretty reasonable. I'm sure my youngest was younger than that when we left her with granny for the night...

So I'm gonna respectfully ask Samantha J and Nat... When should this bloke get overnight care with his 16-month-old child?

Nope sorry, gonna ask Samantha J disrespectfully... Should this bloke have to wait until the baby has a milk shake? Eats cheese, enjoys a boiled egg? Because that seems to be the premise of your moo moo milk argument. Go have a look at the shelves at Coles, clearly lots of other's disagree.

Sorry guys but too much of this has become 'research' based on personal experience... That is called an anecdote, not research.

The kid is 16 months old... He should have overnights with dad (unless there is genuine risk of abuse).

 

[SamanthaJay]

Sammy, don't ask me but like I said, even the WHO recommends breastfeeding, complimented with solid food to 2 years old and beyond. I'm really disappointed for Twooke and his little guy that they are being limited to a an hour contact a week. That is criminal, I agree.

In an ideal world I would suggest something along the lines of 2 hours x 3 times a week, increasing to 3 hours x 3 times a week, etc, etc until 8 hour periods are reached over the next 6 to 8 months. By this stage, if bubs is not weaned, then they'll know he can go 8 hours without a feed and seeing as it's not an ideal world, i.e. baby hasn't self-weaned, Twooke could have overnights from around 2.

I'd like to thank you Sammy and Allforher though, because you've brought back a memory for me. I'm often harsh on my ex - he mostly deserves it but he was very supportive of attachment type of parenting. And we learnt as we went along. I hope all babies get to experience it.

My ex and I did break up for 6 months when our 2nd child (only had 2 then) was just under 3. He was still breastfed and the ex was respectful of the child's feelings about that. He had our eldest (then 5) for overnights (twice a week) and the youngest he would have for half the day or so 2 or 3 days a week. We lived close by so it was easy to do so. The youngest did wean when he was just over 3 so he started to spend the nights with dad as well.

In all honesty Sammy, think about it logically. Why would you swap the most perfect food for a human child for one perfect for a baby cow? It's called brainwashing by the dairy industry.

 

[AllForHer]

Oh, please. Holding breastfeeding against women because we are being asked, on a legal forum, what the legal ramifications of breastfeeding are in a parenting matter?

Give me a break. This is a legal forum, not a breastfeeding support forum, so if you have no legal insight to offer - other than opinions about breastfeeding that nobody in this thread has ever rejected, by the way - then move along.

 

[sammy01]

Nope, not gonna mooooove along.

I personally have rejected the opinions expressed about breastfeeding. In particular moo cow industry brain washing us...

And hell no... The family law act does not need to have changes made to dictate rules around breastfeeding.

 

[SamanthaJay]

Whether you two like it or not, breastfeeding is extremely important for children. It's about the children right, in family law? Talking about it in a law forum is taboo? Says who? Just because you don't want to hear it doesn't make it not important.

Sammy, I thought you were a teacher? Any critical thinking in what you teach?

 

[Rod]

Come on guys, you normally play well together. Might be time to send all of you to the naughty corner(s).

 

[sammy01]

Yup, talking about it on a law forum isn't taboo... Sorry Rod but she started it. Besides, Samantha J is right - I'm a teacher, I should be more critical... But with so many potential moo puns I can't let it go - I'm an English teacher...

The moo cow conspiracy is udderly ridiculous.

So Samantha - Let's assume there is legislation around breastfeeding. I'm gonna propose that in cases of separation and in instances such as Twookie's where mum has shown a disregard for him and for the courts, breastfeeding will not be accepted as a reason to keep a dad away from a child...

With the provision that the child has reached 15 months. So at 15 months spending time with dad is prioritised over breastfeeding. Discuss...

 

[AllForHer]

Samanthajay, I'm sure I mentioned this already, maybe you missed the memo in your urgent need to war cry about breastfeeding, but I breastfed my daughter, so when you carry on like a pork chop, waving the 'breast is best' flag in my face as though I'm stomping my feet and arguing against that ideal, you're preaching to the converted. In fact, I implore you to find me even a single post of my many thousands where I have said 'Women shouldn't breastfeed past X, Y or Z years of age' or that 'Breastmilk has no benefit to kids' or, heck, even that 'Breastmilk has no benefit to kids past X, Y or Z years of age'.

Go on, I'll wait.

Meanwhile, for those interested in how much mettle breastfeeding will have in Court for a child any older than about 12 months, the answer is, unequivocally, practically none.

That has nothing to do with me, or my daughter - who again, was breastfed, by yours truly - or my opinion on breastfeeding. In fact, I wholly support former husbands who wholly support former wives should they wish to breastfeed indefinitely, and I wholly support women who choose to breastfeed indefinitely, and I even support women who choose not to breastfeed at all - whatever choice is made, however that choice pans out, good for them!

But the Court? The fundamental objective of the Court is to uphold children's rights under the Family Law Act. The FLA does not say children have a right to be breastfed. The FLA says children have a right to know, spend time, and communicate with both parents on a regular basis, insofar as their best interests can be met.

Again, nothing to do with me, so pop your torch and pitchfork down, and move along.

 

[SamanthaJay]

Samanthajay, I'm sure I mentioned this already, maybe you missed the memo in your urgent need to war cry about breastfeeding, but I breastfed my daughter, so when you carry on like a pork chop, waving the 'breast is best' flag in my face as though I'm stomping my feet and arguing against that ideal, you're preaching to the converted. In fact, I implore you to find me even a single post of my many thousands where I have said 'Women shouldn't breastfeed past X, Y or Z years of age' or that 'Breastmilk has no benefit to kids' or, heck, even that 'Breastmilk has no benefit to kids past X, Y or Z years of age'.

Go on, I'll wait.

Meanwhile, for those interested in how much mettle breastfeeding will have in Court for a child any older than about 12 months, the answer is, unequivocally, practically none.

That has nothing to do with me, or my daughter - who again, was breastfed, by yours truly - or my opinion on breastfeeding. In fact, I wholly support former husbands who wholly support former wives should they wish to breastfeed indefinitely, and I wholly support women who choose to breastfeed indefinitely, and I even support women who choose not to breastfeed at all - whatever choice is made, however that choice pans out, good for them!

But the Court? The fundamental objective of the Court is to uphold children's rights under the Family Law Act. The FLA does not say children have a right to be breastfed. The FLA says children have a right to know, spend time, and communicate with both parents on a regular basis, insofar as their best interests can be met.

Again, nothing to do with me, so pop your torch and pitchfork down, and move along.

Allforher, I'm not waving the breast is best in your face and I'm not carrying on a like a pork chop. Yes, I know I don't have to. I also know you've breastfed your daughter. You give out fantastic legal help on here. I'm trying to be within that advice that you give. Please don't get defensive. I'm trying to discuss it in relation to help and guidelines (for want of a better word) that you regularly give out. So in that respect, that is why it has to do with you but personally, no, nothing to do with you. I'll have a look at some of your past postings and try and get across my point in another way.

Please understand, this is in no way personal. I value critical thinking in everyone and I value your opinion in how it fits into family law. If you've had enough of the topic, ignore my post. I'll get the message.

 

[SamanthaJay]

Yup talking about it on a law forum isn't taboo... Sorry Rod but she started it. Besides, Samantha J is right I'm a teacher, I should be more critical... But with so many potential moo puns I can't let it go - I'm an English teacher...

The moo cow conspiracy is udderly ridiculous.

So Samantha - Let's assume there is legislation around breastfeeding.... I'm gonna propose that in cases of separation and in instances such as twookie's where mum has shown a disregard for him and for the courts breastfeeding will not be accepted as a reason to keep a dad away from a child... With the provision that the child has reached 15 months. So at 15 months spending time with dad is prioritised over breast feeding. Discuss...

Sammy, research is not big in English classes is it? I know you're busy working and bringing up your kids and it's up to you if you have the slightest bit of interest in the subject, but if you can manage it, do a bit of research into the subject.