NSW Help with Lodging an Application in Family Law?

[Twooke]

Hey guys!

So I'm looking at getting a start on lodging an application in a family law case. Our next directions hearing is in 6 weeks. Yesterday was the third time that my ex took our son an hour early from supervised contact! I again emailed her solicitor today about this. An exact copy and paste to the letter I sent last week with one date change. Last week I got a reply to my email that said that their 'client will recommence the full 2 hours when she feels that the child is ready and not before!'

I have a few questions about lodging this application in a case!

Should I wait a little longer to put it in to include more than just the three that have occurred up until now? If so, when should I have to get it in to be looked at, at the next hearing? A month before?

When writing the times that she has contravened these orders in the affidavit, should I just list the one order she contravened and list the multiple dates that she did so? Or should I make a new contravention for each date she has done it?

Thanks guys!

 

[AllForHer]

Hold up, hold up.

An application in a case is filed to change the interim orders.

A contravention application is filed to remedy contraventions.

Which one are you looking to file?

If you're just seeking mum's compliance with the interim orders, you'll be filing a contravention application. If you do this, please make sure you include an order for costs.

If you're seeking more time with the child on a consistent basis as interim orders, then file an application on a case.

 

[AllForHer]

I just want to check, as well - the orders are definitely for two hours per week, yes? No room for misinterpretation, no conditions that need to be met?

 

[sammy01]

Yep - file a contravention. Do it ASAP since she has not heeded the warning from the solicitor.

Gee, I hope the magistrate gives her a good dressing down... She needs to understand that she isn't the boss... If magistrate can't get her to understand that, you've got a rough time ahead.

 

[Twooke]

Ah ok, well I would be looking at an application in a case!

I was going to do this as I am thinking that these orders are not working, If we were able to do just the changeover at a supervised centre then the orders would work as the only time he'll be at the centre is when it comes time to pick him up!

I would also love to seek more time with him. My job has given me Wednesdays off to see my son, but I'd also like to be able to see him on the weekends as well!!

So when it said orders sought, I said Wednesdays for 2 hours (2-4 which is what it's supposed to be now and Saturdays (12-2) with changeovers to occur at the supervision centre!

Yes it's definitely for 2 hours a week. It says "For two hours a week, at a time of the chosen supervision centres availability!"

No, no conditions have to be met!

 

[AllForHer]

Yeah, okay.

I'd file both - contraventions orders for compliance, and application in a case for more time.

In the contravention application, I would seek costs for half the fees you've paid for the two-hour contact period at the centre, and maybe the make-up time one weekend.

In the application in a case, I would seek eight hours on Wednesday's and one overnight every second weekend, unsupervised. Speak to the contact centre about getting their report of how visits went.

I imagine the lawyer has warned mum about the risk she's taking by contravening, but he's under her instruction. If she doesn't want to accept his legal advice, that's her prerogative.

File them as soon as possible. What you want is for mum to start complying, so the sooner you let her know you've filed, the more likely she is to comply, and don't worry, you can withdraw later if it's resolved itself.

 

[Twooke]

Ah wow!! Those orders sound really really awesome. Way better than the 4 hours I was going to ask. We'd be able to actually start to have a bit of a life and develop our relationship a whole lot more with that!

Just a quick question about overnights. My son will be 16 and a half months at the next hearing and at the last one my ex indicated that she still breastfed our son, and has never expressed! Is that something that could eliminate the chance of an overnight?

I do think it's being used as another reason for me not to have as much time with him, but then again, if it really is the case, I do support him being breastfed!

 

[AllForHer]

Not all kids are the same, but there are some universal truths in development that can be pretty generally applied based on age.

My daughter is 15 months old. Solids and cow's milk have been her primary sources of nutrition since she was 12 months old, and that's fairly standard. Lots of mothers continue breastfeeding well and truly beyond 12 months, but certainly not as the child's primary source of nutrition - breastmilk alone doesn't have enough iron to fulfill a baby's nutritional needs beyond about six months, and while beneficial, breastmilk for a 16.5-month-old is a matter of personal preference, rather than critically necessary nutritional intake.

More than likely, mum is still nursing him just at night, which is pretty common, but bub won't suffer if you substitute the evening 'comfort drink' for cow's milk. It just make take some getting used to for him, that's all.

I don't think the breastfeeding will be the issue. It'll be the fact that the kid has hardly spent any time away from mum (but you did care for him for the first nine months, right? That's more than half his life at this stage). I'm not saying you'll get the overnights, but there is no harm in asking. Alternatively, you could just ask for eight hours on each second Saturday and Sunday for a period of maybe three months without the sleepover, then increase to the overnight after three months.

 

[sammy01]

She is loosing credibility fast when she can't cop 2 hours at a contact centre... You're starting to smell like roses and she is starting to smell like that stuff that roses need to grow...

So do some searching on breastfeeding. Look up Jen McIntosh.... She and read some of her stuff... Here is a start.

Australian Psychological Society : The care of very young children after parental separation

Mate, I reckon at 16 months you ought to be looking at overnight care starting soon enough but obviously she is making some sort of claim about you being a menace to society in order for a contact centre to be necessary... But she is gonna be hard pressed given she has already shown she is a law unto herself.

Gonna make some interesting reading when you post here after the next directions hearing...

 

[nat 2015]

Ah wow!! Those orders sound really really awesome. Way better than the 4 hours I was going to ask. We'd be able to actually start to have a bit of a life and develop our relationship a whole lot more with that!

Just a quick question about overnights. My son will be 16 and a half months at the next hearing and at the last one my ex indicated that she still breastfed our son, and has never expressed! Is that something that could eliminate the chance of an overnight?

I do think it's being used as another reason for me not to have as much time with him, but then again, if it really is the case, I do support him being breastfed!

Just from a nursing mum in regards to breastfeeding, whilst expressing the milk for your baby can be achieved. it's not the same as nursing from the breast, and the mother of your child would have to continue to express through the night, if overnights were established right now.

I think you need to tread carefully and you sound like you support it anyway. I would ask an increase in the hours you have him and perhaps when the child is weaned and ready, then look at overnights.

Good luck