NSW Child Support Even Though Ex is Restricting Access?

[Peter_P93]

We have final orders from August last year... I am in the army and had to deploy to Afghanistan for 6 months. Her opinion was that my “leaving the country to work overseas voided the court orders”. The ex has given me no reason other than I’m a piece of s*#t really... Typical malicious mother syndrome here.

Little one is supposed to spend every second weekend with me, a Wednesday night during my off week and Skype 2 times a week... Have not heard from or seen my little girl since last week of December.

 

[sammy01]

Oh ok... I remember you now. Welcome back.

Mate any chance you can get out of the army? Or no more deployments? Mate she is gonna make the case that the kid was traumatised when you left and you can't keep coming and going blah blah...But the good news is I don't think the magistrate is gonna be interested.

Forget the pre-school. Just one to many battles in your world right now...

What are you asking for as far as the contravention? Make up time? Change of orders to give you more time? The ex to be taken out back and kicked in the butt till she realises? Ok, probably not - but you could ask that she complete a positive parenting course?

When is court?

Really hoping to hear back from you and optimistic you'll get a good result.

 

[Peter_P93]

What is it you want the pre-school to do that they will not do?

Give me updates on her progress, give me access to Kindyhub (allows me to see her activities during the day) lets me know when important things are happening such as photo days or awards days.

 

[Rod]

I tend to agree with Sammy, assuming Kindy finishes in Nov/Dec this year.

The alternative is to write a strong letter to them outlining your Ex does NOT have sole parental responsibility and you have some rights as a father.

Attach a copy of this document: https://education.nsw.gov.au/media/legal/familylawguidelines.pdf highlighting section 13 dealing with parental involvement.

It is dated from 2007, so you may want to check if a newer version is available.

Then suggest if they don't comply asap, you want their official name and name of the manager, and committee members' names for inclusion in possible court action.

Could possibly mention if they are not acting as per official government guidelines then possibly they are not fit to receive government subsidies and you may refer them to {insert relevant name here - Government dept handling subsidies}.

 

[sammy01]

I like Rod's idea... But get through court first. One battle at a time and you don't want to give her anything to bring to court that she could try to manipulate into 'showing' that you're harassing anyone about anything.

 

[Peter_P93]

Court is in a few weeks, still waiting for her to be served papers. Almost 200 alleged instances of contraventions since January.

Should be an interesting day in court hearing her “reasonable excuses”. On a side note, what, in everyone’s experience or opinions are some of the more likely outcomes?

 

[Peter_P93]

I like Rod's idea... But get through court first. One battle at a time and you don't want to give her anything to bring to court that she could try to manipulate into 'showing' that you're harassing anyone about anything.

And this frustrates me... “harassing” what an absolute joke... I was told a few months back that, me asking her if there were new court orders yet was harassing her. Yet when she told me on the phone the other day “oh my god I just want to punch you in the face” is just acceptable.

 

[Rod]

... me asking her if there were new court orders yet was harassing her.

If I was acting for the other side, I could make a case for harassment over the phone call. Do not discuss court matters with her. She has said she doesn't want to talk with you about it - so don't. Keep discussions around pick up, drop off and parenting. Nothing else.

And her comment may be seen as a response to your harassment.

Play it safe with court only weeks away.

 

[Migz]

What is it you want the pre-school to do that they will not do? As Rod Said (copied and paste)

 

[sammy01]

Yup I agree Peter. You fart in her general direction, it is harassment, she threatens violence- she is just expressing an opinion.... So learn to know that is the game and play the game better than her... What is more important to you, proviing to the world she is an idiot? or seeing your kid?

If it is seeing your kid, then play that game...

If you want to world to know she is an idiot then spend your time in court getting her to admit that every second weekend she didn't supply the kids is proof she is stupid. You seem nice, I'm sure you'll succeed regardless of which of those two options you choose. But one of them means you get to see the kid, the other doesn't...

Sucks - but play smart... and realise that playing smart means going against your normal instinct sometimes... But worth doing if you want to see your kid. Play poker face. Don't roll your eyes every time the ex says something dumb. The magistrate is smart let them work it out.