I'll try to keep this as brief as possible...
My ex-husband and I separated 2.5 years ago. I left.
He was emotionally and verbally abusive to me and there had been some physical and verbal abuse to our child during the marriage. When we separated, we did 50/50 custody of children because I was uneducated and just assumed that was what had to be done and he also threatened me with DOCS every chance he got, so I was fearful of rocking the boat.
I've made numerous attempts to mediate with him to change the 50/50 as it's proven over the last couple years to not be working for the kids. They don't cope and there is no consistency in their lives. Plus he works a split shift so always relies on help for the kids.
When I made the first request for mediation he reported me to the police for sexual abuse allegations toward 2 of my children. The allegations were unsubstantiated but the mediation got called off because he reported the alleged abuse to the mediation center also. Between then and now, he's made several suggestions that my children don't feel safe with me, that my now partner is abusive to them and me (which he's not!), that I'm neglectful of them blah blah blah.
Anyway fast forward to now, I've finally gained the strength to put the application in with the family court for property settlement and custody of children.
We recently had our first mention and the court has ordered a family consultant.
His affidavit and notice of risk are littered with lies alleging I'm physically, verbally, emotionally and sexually abusive to my kids. Since our mention, he's lodged subpoenas to Dept of education and child safety.
I'm just so fearful that his lies and manipulation will mean that I'm going to have the kids taken away from me.
He's got a psychologist he takes the kids to backing him up, a doctor and the local school all believing his web if lies. He's even got friends writing statements that they've witnessed me being abusive to the kids when we were together.
I know deep in my heart that he's a manipulative narc and I know I don't abuse my kids but what hope have I got with all these allegations?
I can't get Legal Aid, so I'm self-representing because all our money is tied up in the property he's refused to settle on.
Can someone please tell me they've been through the same thing and come out OK on the other side? My poor, poor children love their dad dearly but it's evident that he's hurting them by trying to destroy me.
I just want peace for my children!
My ex-husband and I separated 2.5 years ago. I left.
He was emotionally and verbally abusive to me and there had been some physical and verbal abuse to our child during the marriage. When we separated, we did 50/50 custody of children because I was uneducated and just assumed that was what had to be done and he also threatened me with DOCS every chance he got, so I was fearful of rocking the boat.
I've made numerous attempts to mediate with him to change the 50/50 as it's proven over the last couple years to not be working for the kids. They don't cope and there is no consistency in their lives. Plus he works a split shift so always relies on help for the kids.
When I made the first request for mediation he reported me to the police for sexual abuse allegations toward 2 of my children. The allegations were unsubstantiated but the mediation got called off because he reported the alleged abuse to the mediation center also. Between then and now, he's made several suggestions that my children don't feel safe with me, that my now partner is abusive to them and me (which he's not!), that I'm neglectful of them blah blah blah.
Anyway fast forward to now, I've finally gained the strength to put the application in with the family court for property settlement and custody of children.
We recently had our first mention and the court has ordered a family consultant.
His affidavit and notice of risk are littered with lies alleging I'm physically, verbally, emotionally and sexually abusive to my kids. Since our mention, he's lodged subpoenas to Dept of education and child safety.
I'm just so fearful that his lies and manipulation will mean that I'm going to have the kids taken away from me.
He's got a psychologist he takes the kids to backing him up, a doctor and the local school all believing his web if lies. He's even got friends writing statements that they've witnessed me being abusive to the kids when we were together.
I know deep in my heart that he's a manipulative narc and I know I don't abuse my kids but what hope have I got with all these allegations?
I can't get Legal Aid, so I'm self-representing because all our money is tied up in the property he's refused to settle on.
Can someone please tell me they've been through the same thing and come out OK on the other side? My poor, poor children love their dad dearly but it's evident that he's hurting them by trying to destroy me.
I just want peace for my children!