NSW Who out there knows how to stop a narcissist?

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Complex16

Well-Known Member
27 July 2016
118
15
454
Technically yes. But I have sought therapy and continue to do so to keep my sanity. It's more so I can't forwarn the loves in his life that follow me, speak about it with his family (which I tried), or speak about him in a derogatory fashion in front of the child etc.

I am currently in trial against a narcissist so I get it, believe me I do. I see a therapist, I do my best to ensure I am healthy and my parenting isn’t compromised. But they are different. They fight differently, dirtier. They believe their own lies, which you would know by now. Keep being you, stay calm. It does all come out in the end...
 
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Maxum Maximus

Well-Known Member
27 October 2018
15
5
99
Thank you Maxum Maximus! Yes. Over the last 5 years I have read about NPD and BPD. Whilst in the relationship I knew stuff was "wrong".. but I didn't realise this was the issue until I tried to work out what had happened. Just when I think I have "it" under control.. I get blindsided at every legal attack. I go straight back into PTSD mode each and every time. I dont ever let him think he has that affect on me. Although, any attention to a NPD is supply for them. It's very hard to go no contact or grey rock when you are expected to co-parent with this person.. and the orders you have been given from the court stop you from talking about it.. with anyone. I'd love any help you are able to provide. Thank you :) x
Most happy to help. Better we take this private.
 
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Maxum Maximus

Well-Known Member
27 October 2018
15
5
99
I am currently in trial against a narcissist so I get it, believe me I do. I see a therapist, I do my best to ensure I am healthy and my parenting isn’t compromised. But they are different. They fight differently, dirtier. They believe their own lies, which you would know by now. Keep being you, stay calm. It does all come out in the end...
Agree. Good advice/encouragement.
 

Complex16

Well-Known Member
27 July 2016
118
15
454
Agree. Good advice/encouragement.

Thank you. Toughest and longest battle of my life to date.

They’re a tough opponent in many respects but conversely also one of the easiest. They lose track of their lies and that’s how they come undone, that’s where the patience comes in.

Such a shame we need a licence and tests to drive a vehicle but there are no narcissist tests before becoming a parent.
 
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Muxaul

Well-Known Member
10 October 2017
146
13
414
I’m on the same boat, suffered a lot from my BPD/NPD ex and I’m still taking counselling to keep myself sane and learning law to gear up myself.

There are so many useful videos on YouTube on this topic that you can watch and learn. I mostly just play the video but only listen to the audio of it while I do other things. There are a lot of people like us that fell into the NPD/BPD trap. Use mental health knowledge to stay strong and protect your own sanity; use law to fight back.
 

sammy01

Well-Known Member
27 September 2015
4,905
694
2,894
men are narcs. Women Border line personality disorders...
Be careful. sure you can have your opinion about the ex. But no one here is qualified to 'diagnose' and it is dangerous territory to walk into court and claim the ex is this or that.

How to deal with? well no legal opinion. Just advice - ignore and learn ambivilence... Hard work. It is a little bit easier to ignore, as in to not respond to text message / abuse or what ever. The real trick is to emotionally not respond. So that the ex has absolutely no impact on your emotional health. When you manage that you have truly learnt that managing a nasty person in what ever form is to not even allow your heart rate / blood pressure to go up. Not even a little bit.

Now in this case... Am i right, there is not even any legal action happening. So why worry. And legal action is definately the worst thing you can do... That is the opposite of the ambivalence strategy mentioned above.
ZEN
 

MumwithkidsNSW

Active Member
26 October 2018
6
2
34
NSW
men are narcs. Women Border line personality disorders...
Be careful. sure you can have your opinion about the ex. But no one here is qualified to 'diagnose' and it is dangerous territory to walk into court and claim the ex is this or that.

How to deal with? well no legal opinion. Just advice - ignore and learn ambivilence... Hard work. It is a little bit easier to ignore, as in to not respond to text message / abuse or what ever. The real trick is to emotionally not respond. So that the ex has absolutely no impact on your emotional health. When you manage that you have truly learnt that managing a nasty person in what ever form is to not even allow your heart rate / blood pressure to go up. Not even a little bit.

Now in this case... Am i right, there is not even any legal action happening. So why worry. And legal action is definately the worst thing you can do... That is the opposite of the ambivalence strategy mentioned above.
ZEN

Thank you. Yes. I would never go to court alleging any MH condition. Obviously I'm not qualified, but "it" ticks ALL the boxes and then some. There has been much legal action threatened. Fortunately this time round it has been thwarted by "it" putting a nail its own coffin for now. One win to me after five years. Hopefully the tide is turning :D It is tripping up on its own lies and behaviour. Starting to sit back and watch it play out now. Just stand my ground. Liberating.
 
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