You came here looking for answers. People gave them... You then told those people they were wrong.... ???
Polygraph tests are not accepted in courts. WHY? They are unreliable.
Drug tests are acceptable. Why? They are reliable.
Is a PI gonna tell you that the information they find is inadmissable? So basically telling you their work is a waste of money? Hmm.
I like what Tremaine wrote "You want to give yourself the best chance of retaining custody of your kids? Then just act like a reasonable parent. That’s literally all you have to do, just act like a reasonable parent. It’s so simple. Reasonable parents don’t hire PIs, they’re not suspicious of hair follicle tests, they don’t imagine they’re doing their best to keep their kids away from drugs while still smoking the occasional joint themselves. They recognise and appreciate that kids have a right to know and have a relationship with both parents, even if they don’t like their ex or their ex’s lifestyle choices, but they will accept reasonable assurances as safeguards where necessary, like a hair follicle test every few months with positive results leading to suspension of care time until a negative result is returned. "
Dad is kidding himself if he thinks the courts will reverse custody... U'm unless... So when did dad see the kids last? What are the current arrangements?
Gee I'm hoping your not one of those who is refusing dad access because mummy always knows best... You're not gonna like what I have to say... But hear me out... And if the kids are spending 3,4, maybe 5 nights with dad a fortnight, I take it all back and apologise...
But if the kids haven't seen dad for ages because you're refusing access you need to hear this. Dad takes drugs (maybe) you wrote "I am actually trying to find out if he is doing drugs and also who he is associating". So he is not a confirmed drug addict? But you smoke pot sometimes, but that is ok? He might have some dodgy friends. But your pot smoking buddies are fine?
Now maybe, just maybe dad hasn't seen the kids in ages because you're refusing access? If that is the case then start letting the kids spend time with their dad. WHY? I'll give you three reasons.
1. The kids have a right to have a relationship with their dad. It isn't me saying that. The laws of this country say it.
2. If he is a drug addict, he will fcuk it up. He will forget to show up, he will ask you to pick the kids up early because he has to go 'do something'. You can document all of this and it is good reliable evidence to show a court.
3. If you're not letting the kids see dad the courts are gonna smash you. What happens if the PI finds nothing? the drug tests are negative. He has documentation to show he is getting treatment and has made progress with his ADHD. What happens if he has a character reference from God? But you're refusing access because you don't like his friends? And think he 'might' be doing drugs (but not pot - because that is ok your honour). Guess what is likely to happen? The courts will grant dad primary care because he has demonstrated a preparedness to ensure the kids have a relationship with YOU. Something you're not prepared to do for him.
4. Kids have a right to hav a relationship with their dad. Yup wrote it twice because you need to hear it.
Polygraph tests are not accepted in courts. WHY? They are unreliable.
Drug tests are acceptable. Why? They are reliable.
Is a PI gonna tell you that the information they find is inadmissable? So basically telling you their work is a waste of money? Hmm.
I like what Tremaine wrote "You want to give yourself the best chance of retaining custody of your kids? Then just act like a reasonable parent. That’s literally all you have to do, just act like a reasonable parent. It’s so simple. Reasonable parents don’t hire PIs, they’re not suspicious of hair follicle tests, they don’t imagine they’re doing their best to keep their kids away from drugs while still smoking the occasional joint themselves. They recognise and appreciate that kids have a right to know and have a relationship with both parents, even if they don’t like their ex or their ex’s lifestyle choices, but they will accept reasonable assurances as safeguards where necessary, like a hair follicle test every few months with positive results leading to suspension of care time until a negative result is returned. "
Dad is kidding himself if he thinks the courts will reverse custody... U'm unless... So when did dad see the kids last? What are the current arrangements?
Gee I'm hoping your not one of those who is refusing dad access because mummy always knows best... You're not gonna like what I have to say... But hear me out... And if the kids are spending 3,4, maybe 5 nights with dad a fortnight, I take it all back and apologise...
But if the kids haven't seen dad for ages because you're refusing access you need to hear this. Dad takes drugs (maybe) you wrote "I am actually trying to find out if he is doing drugs and also who he is associating". So he is not a confirmed drug addict? But you smoke pot sometimes, but that is ok? He might have some dodgy friends. But your pot smoking buddies are fine?
Now maybe, just maybe dad hasn't seen the kids in ages because you're refusing access? If that is the case then start letting the kids spend time with their dad. WHY? I'll give you three reasons.
1. The kids have a right to have a relationship with their dad. It isn't me saying that. The laws of this country say it.
2. If he is a drug addict, he will fcuk it up. He will forget to show up, he will ask you to pick the kids up early because he has to go 'do something'. You can document all of this and it is good reliable evidence to show a court.
3. If you're not letting the kids see dad the courts are gonna smash you. What happens if the PI finds nothing? the drug tests are negative. He has documentation to show he is getting treatment and has made progress with his ADHD. What happens if he has a character reference from God? But you're refusing access because you don't like his friends? And think he 'might' be doing drugs (but not pot - because that is ok your honour). Guess what is likely to happen? The courts will grant dad primary care because he has demonstrated a preparedness to ensure the kids have a relationship with YOU. Something you're not prepared to do for him.
4. Kids have a right to hav a relationship with their dad. Yup wrote it twice because you need to hear it.
Last edited: