WA Ex has Medical Condition - Get More Time with Child?

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NathanT

Well-Known Member
9 December 2015
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Mate just keep going. As far as I can see you're case is an example of the system getting it right. But pick your battles, if the ex would rather drop the kid of with a friend than with you, that is her choice... Like I said, even if you get final orders that say mum has to offer you additional time first... But if she doesn't do it what then? it isn't worth taking back to court.

To save you some $$$ have you offered to accept 3 a week as final consent orders? Mate that is not a bad deal and unless the family report writer states that you should be the primary carer, I reckon you ought to seek 3 a week as final orders to save the grief / $$ of court... But I also understand why you would continue
Thanks Sammy. Ex made a big deal in court about me using the before and after school care so that I can go to work and yet she uses school mums to do the “play date” thing. Where is the fairness in that? I won’t be settling for 3 nights a week. It’s about time she proves why she is worthy of being primary carer, or does being unemployed gives her the advantage.
 

sammy01

Well-Known Member
27 September 2015
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Ok so do you think you will get primary care?

How much money is worth spending in court for one extra night a fortnight?

Court won't care that you use after school care, mate I'm a school teacher, my school is 30 min away from home / kids school. After school care is a necessity.. But is a he uses after school care vs she uses friends fight worth having...

Look it is your lot in life, but for one night a fortnight, I'd not worry... even if you had 50/50 care that won't change the fact that the ex will think she is a better / more important / parent than you.. Let her think it...

I'd save the $$$ on court and take your kid for a holiday next school holidays and the one after that and the one after that - holidays are expensive and fun. Solicitors are expensive and not fun
 

NathanT

Well-Known Member
9 December 2015
18
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Ok so do you think you will get primary care?
How much money is worth spending in court for one extra night a fortnight?
Court won't care that you use after school care, mate I'm a school teacher, my school is 30 min away from home / kids school. After school care is a necessity.. But is a he uses after school care vs she uses friends fight worth having...
Look it is your lot in life, but for one night a fortnight, I'd not worry... even if you had 50/50 care that won't change the fact that the ex will think she is a better / more important / parent than you.. Let her think it...
I'd save the $$$ on court and take your kid for a holiday next school holidays and the one after that and the one after that - holidays are expensive and fun. Solicitors are expensive and not fun
Yeah, totally agree with you on court being an expensive experience. By the way, it isn't for an extra night a fortnight but an extra 4 to 5 nights a fortnight.

Her legal aid lawyer is not representing her anymore.

Even with current arrangements she still makes up excuses to hold child over every other week. Just about all the points on the interim order has been challenged by her interpretation and I've spent $$$ just dealing with her about the interpretation.
 

sammy01

Well-Known Member
27 September 2015
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Oh dear... Well at least she is now confronted with having to self rep or pay a solicitor.

So I reckon you continue with solicitors to final hearing... But get ready to self rep because even once you have final orders if she is going to breach them you'll be back in court... Mate they will only give her so much rope and then they'll watch her hang herself....
 

NathanT

Well-Known Member
9 December 2015
18
0
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I reckon her real motives are transparent. I just hope the magistrate gives her what she deserves.
 

AllForHer

Well-Known Member
23 July 2014
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Okay, so an observation.

You seem to be hopeful that the judge is going to punish the ex for being difficult by making parenting orders in your favour.

The problem, though, is that you haven't actually made any real assertion as to why it's in the child's best interests to spend, say, 11 nights a fortnight with you and just 3 nights a fortnight with her mother.


What argument are you making to support such arrangements?

That she prefers to decide for herself who cares for the child at times when care of the child is her responsibility?

That she doesn't like you?

Come on, now. What's that got to do with your child?

The Court doesn't really care about whatever bad blood exists between you and your ex. The judges aren't idiots, they know that parents don't break up unless there's bad blood. They only care about what's best for your kid.

If you and your ex have abided by the interim orders, which are very generous, by the way, then that's enough to prove that you can get along well enough for shared care to work, so you're going to look a bit dim-witted going into Court seeking majority care on grounds mummy says mean things about you to the kid and doesn't let you babysit.

Seek 50/50 and you'll likely get it. Seek an overhaul of residency and you'll likely show the Court you lack insight about what's really best for the kid.
 

NathanT

Well-Known Member
9 December 2015
18
0
71
Okay, so an observation.

You seem to be hopeful that the judge is going to punish the ex for being difficult by making parenting orders in your favour.

The problem, though, is that you haven't actually made any real assertion as to why it's in the child's best interests to spend, say, 11 nights a fortnight with you and just 3 nights a fortnight with her mother.


What argument are you making to support such arrangements?

That she prefers to decide for herself who cares for the child at times when care of the child is her responsibility?

That she doesn't like you?

Come on, now. What's that got to do with your child?

The Court doesn't really care about whatever bad blood exists between you and your ex. The judges aren't idiots, they know that parents don't break up unless there's bad blood. They only care about what's best for your kid.

If you and your ex have abided by the interim orders, which are very generous, by the way, then that's enough to prove that you can get along well enough for shared care to work, so you're going to look a bit dim-witted going into Court seeking majority care on grounds mummy says mean things about you to the kid and doesn't let you babysit.

Seek 50/50 and you'll likely get it. Seek an overhaul of residency and you'll likely show the Court you lack insight about what's really best for the kid.
Thanks for your observation. My lawyer has helped to build a strong case for the trial based on evidence collected over the last 2 years. I have not put all the details here.
 

Complex16

Well-Known Member
27 July 2016
118
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Thanks for your observation. My lawyer has helped to build a strong case for the trial based on evidence collected over the last 2 years. I have not put all the details here.
Good on you and keep at it! Of course you haven’t posted all the details here, who can?! It’s just not possible especially when there is years worth to discuss. Yet the judgements and assumptions are made regardless. Sometimes the advice is good and without the judgements and assumptions so keep coming back... keep checking in. Let us know how you get on.

At the end of the day it’s just someone else’s opinion provided, and an opinion is like an asshole, everyone has one right? The only one that matters is that of your lawyer and the professional advice you pay for.
 

NathanT

Well-Known Member
9 December 2015
18
0
71
Good on you and keep at it! Of course you haven’t posted all the details here, who can?! It’s just not possible especially when there is years worth to discuss. Yet the judgements and assumptions are made regardless. Sometimes the advice is good and without the judgements and assumptions so keep coming back... keep checking in. Let us know how you get on.

At the end of the day it’s just someone else’s opinion provided, and an opinion is like an asshole, everyone has one right? The only one that matters is that of your lawyer and the professional advice you pay for.


it has been a while sign I logged in. That’s because the living arrangements was reversed by the court and my child has been living with me predominantly.
What was obvious during trial was that the other parent was not going to allow or encourage a meaningful relationship between child and both parents. That is something worth keeping in mind.
 

sammy01

Well-Known Member
27 September 2015
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Seems like a good result. i hope things settle down for you now all the court stuff is finished.