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Feeling Worried

Active Member
7 June 2015
7
0
31
My de facto partner and I met in Dec 2007 - in January 2009 we became financially tied and purchased a house together. At the same time, I already had a house (purchased in 1999) in which I had $500k equity and he had two homes that were still owned by himself and his ex. My daughter lives in my home with her partner and my two grandchildren - that arrangement was already in place.

Late in 2010, he completed a property settlement with his ex and he gave her both properties, walking away with $20k from the relationship. However, during the period 2007 until the properties were sold in 2010 we paid a lot of money to his ex to assist in the mortgage and also in Child Support.

Re my house and the property we bought together - combined we financed both properties - the one that we bought together and the one that I owned - in addition to that 'combined' we paid everything to do with his daughter from his previous relationship - Child Support, every holiday, air fares, school cost, medical costs etc. We also paid money to help look after his mother.

My daughter and her husband earned minimal money and did not pay rent, this was an issue for my partner although the arrangement was one that he knew was the case when entering in to the relationship - My daughter also suffers extreme mental illness hence my need to assist financially in making sure she was okay. So now we are separating, and although he walked away from two houses he now wants to take me for mine. According to him only the money that he contributed to my mortgage counts as it is against something tangible however the money that I contributed to child support etc etc will not be taken into account.

I just want to split knowing that we both contributed equally - share the house that we purchased together and leave mine alone. I am not sure where I stand but, for obvious reasons, am quite worried that I will lose my home. I would like to add that the mortgage on my home was $1036 per month and the money we paid in Child Support etc was the same if not more.

Any help will be well received.
 

Tracy B

Well-Known Member
24 December 2014
435
72
789
Australia
Hi Feeling Worried,

What you're asking for sounds like a reasonable position. Have you spoken with your ex about this position? Is he unwilling to agree?

As for whether child support counts, yes it does. Any money spent during the relationship (mortgage, fees and expenses on the house, house and family upkeep) can be considered as contribution.

For what the court would consider in dividing property, read:
 

Feeling Worried

Active Member
7 June 2015
7
0
31
Hi Feeling Worried,

What you're asking for sounds like a reasonable position. Have you spoken with your ex about this position? Is he unwilling to agree?

As for whether child support counts, yes it does. Any money spent during the relationship (mortgage, fees and expenses on the house, house and family upkeep) can be considered as contribution.

For what the court would consider in dividing property, read:
Thanks Tracy, yes, I have spoken to him about my thoughts on an equitable split, however, he is not interested. I am thankful to hear your response regarding what counts and what doesn't count and will read the articles you have suggested. All early days, but going on the tone of the correspondence I am receiving, I don't think it is going to be an easy separation. Thanks again.
 

Feeling Worried

Active Member
7 June 2015
7
0
31
Tracy, or anybody else that has any advice; in addition to the above, my ex worked overseas for the last two years, prior to that we both did for five. In the 12 months prior to our split he opened an off shore account and had his pay submitted there. I was only sent enough to pay the bills, and a basic amount to survive on, however, the rest remained with him overseas to spend at his whim, which he did. When we split, I had nothing and he kept the money off shore to himself. In the time he was overseas, I maintained the property, had his daughter on holidays etc etc. Do I have any legal right to the money that he earned and kept overseas or would this be seen as something that is his because he earned it and I have no right to it?
 

Tracy B

Well-Known Member
24 December 2014
435
72
789
Australia
I believe he would need to disclose this in his finance details. These are earnings he made and the offshore accounts are assets he holds. They would likely form part of the "shared pool" of assets. Whether you are entitled to it depends on how the "shared pool" of assets should be split.
 

Feeling Worried

Active Member
7 June 2015
7
0
31
Thanks Tracy, am trying to get all of my thoughts today and am just throwing out questions as I think of them.
 

Tracy B

Well-Known Member
24 December 2014
435
72
789
Australia
You're welcome Feeling Worried. It's understandable, given this must be a difficult time for you. Glad the community here can help. If you think of any other questions, just ask away, and we'll help if we can.
 

Feeling Worried

Active Member
7 June 2015
7
0
31
Hi Tracey, some more questions if I may - my ex has sent me an email advising that I am not allowed to drive the car until the settlement is sorted - we bought it together, however, it is in my name! I have no other means of getting around and wonder whether this is able to be done - right now I have ignored it! He lives overseas and has purchased a new car out of the money that was earned when we were together; if he continues down this line, can I also say that this car should also be considered as part of the pool when it comes to settlement and perhaps he should do the same? The houses he had with his ex we both financed, paying huge amounts of money from 2008 until 2010 when they were sold. He wanted to keep the peace and gave her both properties walking away with $20K; is there anyway I can now ask for him to compensate me for any of this given the period of time that has lapsed? I don't want to play this game - I just want the split that was mentioned in my first post; but ultimately, if he continues down this line then I need to know what I am able to draw on should I need. Any advice will be appreciated.
 

Tracy B

Well-Known Member
24 December 2014
435
72
789
Australia
can I also say that this car should also be considered as part of the pool when it comes to settlement and perhaps he should do the same?

The car will likely form part of the "shared pool". Without a property agreement, he cannot prevent you from using any of your assets, and vice versa. So he can't really prevent you from driving the car. If he wanted to, he can apply for an injunction, but will most likely lose since the car is in your name.

is there anyway I can now ask for him to compensate me for any of this given the period of time that has lapsed

If he and you contributed to the house financially, this contribution is considered in the property settlement. He should have had a share in the house, if he gave his share away in his property settlement agreement with his ex, then you could argue he obtained a benefit out of this and that this should be considered as an asset and expense. As for whether you can go after the ex now, the law does not prevent you from going after your share (i.e. there is no statutory bar on the action). However, whether you have forfeited your right to sue the ex or claim your share from the house depends on the actual arrangement between you, your ex and his ex. It's probably easier going after your ex for the money (as a contribution you made in the relationship with him).
 

Feeling Worried

Active Member
7 June 2015
7
0
31
Thanks Tracy, I wasn't considering going after his ex - was only looking at any avenues open between myself and him and, again, I don't particularly want to go down any of these roads. I would rather just split the property that we purchased together and walk away. If I have these other possibilities up my sleeves as things I can put out there should he continue on the road that he seems to be travelling down, then I am hopeful that the fear of what he might have to pay out will dissuade him!