QLD Is it possible to do settlement without the other partry?

[Atticus]

Im trying to work out if she can just walk in and say I cant find him and the system bows to her wants or does she actually have to show something that says she has tried.

No she can't... She would have to satisfy the court that what she HAS tried is sufficient enough for them to conclude that you either genuinely can not be found, or don't want to be found

I get the whole DV misuse & abuse issue. I, like others on this forum have been there

I spent almost $10k on a lawyer that was so f***ing useless all should did was make sure i had money in trust. Sends a letter regarding listing property giving my ex 14 to reply. 3 months later I chase it up, I get oh sorry shes seeking legal advice.. Then i askwhat happens if she doesnt reply, I get told you go to circuit court and get a court order for $25,000

That sucks that you have been screwed around by a slacker. They are out there unfortunately... The good news is IF you want to, you can file for orders yourself for under $200. That will be enough to get her served with an initiating application to which she will need to respond & get the ball rolling....

If that is something you would be interested in, Just say so & I or others will post you some links to look at..

 

[sammy01]

I'd be contacting the free or almost free mediation services. Relationships Australia is a start. If for no other reason than to have evidence that you've tried. So if she does go behind your back and try and geta claim by saying she couldn't find you, you have solid evidecne to the contrary. I'd be hitting her up for time with the kids too. At least when the kids are older and come looking for you to ask questions you can tell them you tried.

 

[Atticus]

I'd be contacting the free or almost free mediation services. Relationships Australia is a start. If for no other reason than to have evidence that you've tried. So if she does go behind your back and try and geta claim by saying she couldn't find you, you have solid evidecne to the contrary

Good idea ^^^

 

[John Z]

bb

Well, If you manage to disappear well enough so that the court is satisfied you either can't be located, or don't want to be, they can ultimately make orders, ( likley granting whatever it is she is seeking) .... If it ever got to that point, I don't know if just showing up out of the woodwork suddenly is going to reverse it, certainly not without you then needing to apply to court yourself anyway, which I'm guessing you don't want to do.

If she wants to make an application for settlement, isn't that exactly what you need to get your name off the mortgage... If she can't buy out your share, the court will order the house be sold & you may even finish up with a few bucks ... If getting her out of the house is your main game (don't agree but your business) that would do it .

Is there some other reason you are sh*t scared of court? unpaid child support or something? Just struggling to get where you're are coming from

No reason other than the costs involved, I have massive anxiety issues and cannot deal with the stress. Add to that the complexity of it all. I started by seeking legal advise and just got screwed by them. Every attempt to do anything has been met with "im seeking advice". I only learnt of mediation after 18 months when I was told by my legal person that I had verbally refused it. How do I verbally refuse something when Im not allowed to talk to the person.
It was bulls**t.
This current crap has me on the edge. I have nothing holding me back, no friends no family nothing.
The only money I have left besides a bit of super is my share of the house. All I want to do is sell it pay off the mortgage and go away. I never want to see her again.
Im so done with this s**t. I can really see why people go nuts trying to sort this s**t out. She threw me out of my life and I did what the law said I must do. Now the law is going to bend to her whims again. This is not right.
I think its time for a BIG drink and a very fast drive

 

[Atticus]

No reason other than the costs involved

If she were to apply, you would be the respondent... No reason you can't self represent, at least in the initial stages till you sus out what she wants out of it... Worse case scenario. You get nothing out of it, (so no worse off than you are now financially?) but that would still get you off mortgage & you're done with it..

Mate, it sounds to me like you just need to concentrate on your own mental health for now... If that is affecting your ability to work, then that could also be a factor taken into account in a property settlement (in your favour) .... You should seriously consider seeing a decent counselor to help you if you are struggling... Many blokes have been where you are, come out the other side & life is better than it has ever been.

If you are into self help, there's a bloke by the name of Anthony Hart who has been through it all & come back better than ever .... Well worth you taking a look >>>>> Lifeback Tracker Early Intervention Mental Health Tool

It's been a great help for a lot of blokes