VIC Intervention order procedures

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Atticus

Well-Known Member
6 February 2019
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Just an update on my situation... Ex finally told the mediators that she is not going through meditation and they issued me a section 60I certificate. I have passed the certificate to my lawyers and they have sent her a letter asking for time with my daughter in the interim ...
Thanks for the update .... Things are finally moving now you have the S60I.. Not sure I see the point of writing a letter to her though TBH, surely she would have offered something in mediation if she was going to... I would be moving straight to initiating application personally
Is there any other way to get into family courts early to get access to my child when my interim IVO is pending for October court hearing?
Talk to your lawyer about seeking urgent interim orders along with initiating application for parenting orders to see if you have grounds
 

Rod

Lawyer
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www.hutchinsonlegal.com.au

rajb

Active Member
23 April 2020
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Have you been to court at all yet in this case? Or did she apply in April and your first hesring is in Oct?
First of all thank you for all the information. This will be my first hearing in October. Yes she applied for AVO in April. Since that day I initiated mediation and only a few weeks ago I got the section 60I. The mediators wouldn't give me an answer why the mediation couldn't go ahead and stated sub regulation 25(2) in the section 60I certificate. Applicant was my ex not the police.

The day I picked up the AVO from the police station they said that I can go and see my daughter in the interim and stated the following:
(a) do anything that is permitted by a Family Law Act order, a child protection order or a
written agreement about child arrangements; or
(b) negotiate child arrangements by letter, email or text message; or
(c) communicate with a protected person through a lawyer or mediator; or
(d) arrange and/or participate in counselling or mediation.


Write a letter to your ex and her lawyer if she has one.
I have zero communication from her since I initiated mediation because she said that I have to wait until the end of mediation. But at the end of mediation I ended up with section 60I cert. Previously I tried asking her to work on some sort of parenting agreement but never got a reply so I got my lawyer to send a letter after a long attempt at mediation. Ever since I separated all the arguments and messages were only about me trying to get more time with my daughter and nothing else. Funny thing is when the last argument happened she put a knife to my throat while I was holding my daughter in the kitchen which she clearly mentioned in the AVO statement. I was shaken but I never went to the cops because I wanted my daughter to have access to both the parents but unfortunately she went to the cops and blocked access to my daughter for 4+ months and counting.

So my advise would be DO NOT ACCEPT.
I am getting mixed information from various conversations. Some suggest that it is better to Consent without Admissions and put all my effort into the family law side where I can get the parenting order sorted out. Agreeing to an undertaking is at the mercy of my ex and I would like to pursue if I knew what evidence she has against me. In my own memory I have never threatened to hurt anyone and I am 110% sure there are no texts/emails stating that.

I forgot to mention, in the letter, write that you believe you are not a risk to the protected persons, that since the FVO was issued your conduct has been exemplary, and you are in no way a danger to you ex or your daughter. As you want your daughter removed, mention you have gone to relationships Australia and made all efforts for mediation. That although you have the cert that you still want your ex and you to mediate as that is the best outcome for your daughter. Mention how you are a dotting father (but dont lie, if you've not been that involved then dont go overboard here as she may show evidence otherwise) and that you love your daughter and that you believe its important for your daughter to have a meaningful relationship with her father and grandpare ts who see has got to know. This all shows intent.
This is so true and really good advice and definitely take this on board. Ever since the AVO I have initiated mediation and done counselling sessions with RAV and been a good character as my work employees/friends/family would agree. Even my boss was surprised to hear that I got an AVO. I have been trying to find a parenting program as well to do part time but none are held at the moment. The reason being is my daughter was living primarily with my ex since she told me that she doesn't want me in her life. I don't want her to come and say that I don't know how to look after my daughter because I never put her to sleep or given her a bath etc...
 

rajb

Active Member
23 April 2020
12
0
31
Thanks for the update .... Things are finally moving now you have the S60I.. Not sure I see the point of writing a letter to her though TBH, surely she would have offered something in mediation if she was going to... I would be moving straight to initiating application personally

Talk to your lawyer about seeking urgent interim orders along with initiating application for parenting orders to see if you have grounds

Yes finally moving along - mediators are not disclosing what exactly is the reason but this is what was written in the S60I

Mr & Mrs Smith did not attend family dispute resolution with me and the other party or parties to the proceedings because I consider, having regard to
the matters mentioned in sub-regulation 25 (2), that it would not be appropriate to conduct the proposed family dispute resolution.


Thanks for the update .... Things are finally moving now you have the S60I.. Not sure I see the point of writing a letter to her though TBH, surely she would have offered something in mediation if she was going to... I would be moving straight to initiating application personally

Talk to your lawyer about seeking urgent interim orders along with initiating application for parenting orders to see if you have grounds

Thank you - I will be contacting my lawyer regarding this. The deadline for an answer from her or her lawyer was set to this week. After that I am proceeding with the application.
 

Atticus

Well-Known Member
6 February 2019
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I have been trying to find a parenting program as well to do part time but none are held at the moment. The reason being is my daughter was living primarily with my ex since she told me that she doesn't want me in her life. I don't want her to come and say that I don't know how to look after my daughter because I never put her to sleep or given her a bath etc...
Nobody, mother or father has any experience with these things until they bring their first born home from hospital... Kids don't come with an instructional DVD, & hospitals don't keep kids till the parents have done a parenting course .... All I'm saying is don't stress if you can't find a parenting course.
 

Dpj

Well-Known Member
1 July 2020
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414
Funny thing is when the last argument happened she put a knife to my throat while I was holding my daughter in the kitchen which she clearly mentioned in the AVO statement

As in she said her AVO she put a knife to your throat? Have you spoken to the cops? Even just to ask advice, rather than making a claim or mentioning names?. Personally, although cops have stuffed up with me a few times, overall i have found them to be bloody reasonable and helpful. And i had plrnty of convos with cops not involved in my FVO. I know people have said why write a letter, but personally, if cops say its ok to write a letter, i would and ask for all the evidence plus those other things. I honestly cant see the downside (ps, i aint no lawyer tho and am a rookie in this whole process really) and if there is potential upside then why not. May be one of the other guys can weigh in on this. Yes my applicants were the cops, but my letter changed the whole course of my case and was the best thing i did.

Do you have texts from her admittimg the knife incident? Or any others?
 

rajb

Active Member
23 April 2020
12
0
31
As in she said her AVO she put a knife to your throat? Have you spoken to the cops? Even just to ask advice, rather than making a claim or mentioning names?. Personally, although cops have stuffed up with me a few times, overall i have found them to be bloody reasonable and helpful. And i had plrnty of convos with cops not involved in my FVO. I know people have said why write a letter, but personally, if cops say its ok to write a letter, i would and ask for all the evidence plus those other things. I honestly cant see the downside (ps, i aint no lawyer tho and am a rookie in this whole process really) and if there is potential upside then why not. May be one of the other guys can weigh in on this. Yes my applicants were the cops, but my letter changed the whole course of my case and was the best thing i did.

Do you have texts from her admittimg the knife incident? Or any others?

No, I haven't spoken to cops except on the day I went and received the AVO orders where they stated that I can go see my child if there is an agreement between both parties. My ex mentioned that I intimidated her verbally and that's why she put the knife to my throat while I was carrying my baby. Claimed that my daughter is traumatized by this event and never want me near her anytime soon and wanted some time off. I was disappointed by this event and drafted up a preliminary parenting plan to avoid arguments in front of daughter in the future. She ignored everything and 1 week later went and lodged the AVO.
 

Terry Yun

Active Member
7 July 2020
11
0
31
Hi guys,

My ex wife and I are separated for over a year now. Last week she filed an interim restraining order stating that I can't come near her or my daughter. She created a story which is not entirely true but to restrict me from seeing my daughter (2yo).
What is my best cause of action before my court appearance? I don't want to spend thousands of dollars fighting it out as we are both struggling at the moment and her decision seems a bit irrational during this period of uncertainty in the world.
I need to get a lawyer to represent me in court for the IVO? Do I find someone to initiate a mediation prior to the court case? I am a bit distraught and overwhelmed by how everything is panning out.
Hi
interim order may be quashed. Please attend hearing and provide defence that you are not harmful or dangerous to your ex wife and daughter.
you must provide evidence you are a sound person not to cause any risk to wellbeing of your ex and daughter.
Thanks
 

Dpj

Well-Known Member
1 July 2020
147
7
414
Hi
interim order may be quashed. Please attend hearing and provide defence that you are not harmful or dangerous to your ex wife and daughter.
you must provide evidence you are a sound person not to cause any risk to wellbeing of your ex and daughter.
Thanks

@rajb i agree with this. Is the fact she put a kniglfe to your throat in the AVO details? If so, thats obserd and a highly extreme action for sekf defense. Self defense is defined by law in regards in regards to be able to use violence against a person. I read it just the other day. I would suggest you call and talk to cops. I found then highly reasonable and they basically said in so many words the more they spoke to me vs the ex the more they liked me and the less they believed the ex.

If the knife incident isnt in the AVO. Do you have texts of it? Do you have any correspondence of her 'intimidating' you? If so, gather it as evidence to the contrary. Make sure you have all this for court. Does she have a lawyer? I was advised if the cops are applicant and you ask for 'all evidence you in intend to use in the case' they have to provide it. In my case they stated they had none. May be your ex has to provide evidence if you ask, if she doesnt have this or doesnt respond then may be that will help. I dont know.

But just grab all that evidence. Talk to the cops
 

rajb

Active Member
23 April 2020
12
0
31
Hi Guys,

Spoke to the cops but they said go ahead with the family court as the decision there will triumph your AVO.

Well the parenting agreement I sent via the lawyers didn't stand as she counteracted with a proposal which is very very unreasonable.

- For example allowing to seeing my daughter for a few hours a week about an hour half away from my place while I proposed somewhere in middle for both parties to meet.
- That I do mens behaviour change program (clause 2) in order to see my daughter
- Also to do post separation parenting course (because I never had unsupervised time and I wouldn't know how to look after her)
- That the mother takes sole responsibility of the child and long term decisions in everything but not limited to religion, health and education. If no decision is made then mother will finalise the decision while taking father's views.
- My daughter lives with her and I only get supervised views

The main reason for above is my daughter who is only 18months old is startled by loud noises, withdrawn from social activities, separation anxiety and difficulty sleeping due to an argument we had that day in April when she filed the AVO. I cannot believe it because my daughter played with me happily the next few visits after the incident and never shown any signs of the above. I really don't know if a 18month old baby can experience all of above and stated those behaviours are witnessed by daycare and at home.

I am really worried about the allegations because it seems to be manufactured to push me away from my daughter.