NSW How Do I Get My Son Back Under Family Law?

[sammy01]

The DV is irrelevant - what matters is that the father has made a decision without discussing it with you.

I would have thought mediation FDR would not be necessary given you're applying for an urgent recovery order

 

[Erica]

I was really lucky with legal aid, got approval through fast for funding for the recovery order (overnight), got a great private solicitor as legal aid don't have any in my area, and the paperwork was filed with the court today for an urgent recovery order and a waiver for the FDR. But there wasn't anything about interim orders or final orders, I don't know why? Praying that doesn't delay anything!

Solicitor said the registrar should let us know within 24-48 hours when the court date is so II'll know by early next week if it was accepted as urgent or not. The wait is so hard!

Father has cut contact to one phone call a week, Thursdays at 8pm

 

[Erica]

What proof do you have that the father has been violent?

I'm not sure. The final assault on his first ex wife was in public and people intervened, he left the scene but the police found him and arrested him. I don't know if charges were filed or not but I'd assume they were.

I didn't go to the police, ever, I was too scared to. But in the end I did go through domestic violence crisis counsellors, a gp, DV refuges etc.

The next wife also didn't go to the police after any assaults, but did go to the police at the end of the relationship and make a full statement so it would be dated and on file.

I know this is irrelevant in regards to the recovery order, but hopefully it will be seen as relevant in regards to future contact. None of what he is doing now is about my son or what's best for him, it's about control, punishment, arrogance, and women being 'irrelevant'

 

[AllForHer]

So, none of what you've listed above really constitutes proof of violence. Police reports can contain anything (and indeed, you will see many posts on this very forum about how to change a police statement). It's the charge and conviction that constitutes evidence, rather than just a police report.

As it stands, it's not going to have much impact on future contact unless you can provide evidence that the father poses an unacceptable risk to the child.

 

[sammy01]

Yep, just focus on the recovery order because the kid was settled with you and this disruption isn't in his best interest.

So can you keep us informed how you go because I'm really interested in how this pans out.

Look once you get the kid back I'd suggest you then offer dad consent orders that provide for 4-5 visits a year. So your kid can see dad, but you can feel confident this won't happen again.

 

[Erica]

Is him being settled with me enough? My affidavit seemed so simple and short but I'm guessing that's because there isn't much history.

What if this takes months and he becomes settled there? I'm going out of my mind with worry, all the 'what ifs?' and being clueless about family law. I've read anything I can possibly find on recovery orders but all I can find is information about applying for them.

Are they rare or common? I can't even think of what questions to ask, I'm going out of my mind

 

[sammy01]

I can't imagine the despair.

I'm gonna give you some stuff to read. But please, don't send yourself crazy... These are court cases for urgent recovery orders.

AustLII Results - urgent recovery orders

Look based on what you've told us - I can't imagine the courts not returning your child.

 

[Erica]

It's a bit like trying to play google doctor - you read one thing that makes you panic, but another that helps you feel some relief. Research helps somehow so thanks so much for the link, I really appreciate it

 

[sammy01]

Yep - sometimes the more you read the more confusing it is...

Based on the info you've provided - I do think you'll have your child back soon enough.

 

[Erica]

Thank you! I needed to hear that.