NSW Likelihood of Getting Relocation Request Approved?

Discussion in 'Family Law Forum' started by Alchemy, 14 January 2018.

  1. Alchemy

    Alchemy Well-Known Member

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    Hello,

    I’m wanting to relocate with my 3 sons. My eldest son has a different father to my 2 youngest children. I’m wanting to go back to where my eldest son's father lives. My reasons are for more work / better opportunities, closer to my eldest son's father (he’s about about to start puberty and I’d love the support and I feel he’s been very consistent in his life and wanting to play a bigger part as we’ve lived away for 9 years of his life) and there’s so much more to do on the coast than the country.

    I’ve asked my 2 youngest children’s father if it’s ok, but he’s not replying. He’s been very inconsistent in their life but is now seeing them every second Wednesday. They don’t want to stay so they just go there for dinner.

    I think I’ll have to ask the family court for permission.

    So just wondering the likelihood of it being approved?

    It’s a very difficult situation I’m in and I want to do the right thing. I’ve suggested he can FaceTime whenever he wanted and a week each holidays and 2-3 weekss, Christmas holidays, meeting half way for pick up / drop off (like I do with my eldest son's dad now, just going the opposite way). Alternate Easter/Christmas. And one visit during the school terms.

    Any suggestions are very much appreciated. Thank you.
     
  2. sammy01

    sammy01 Well-Known Member

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    How recent was separation? How old are the young kids?
     
  3. Alchemy

    Alchemy Well-Known Member

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    He left us November 2013. So it’s been over 4 year.s The younger children are 5-year-old twins.
     
  4. Tim W

    Tim W Lawyer
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    Are there any Parenting Orders in place?
    Or any other requirement that compels you to live in Place X rather than Place Y?
     
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  5. Alchemy

    Alchemy Well-Known Member

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    There are no parenting orders in place. We went to mediation and it worked for a while but then he stopped seeing them for the second time. Spiritually I’m not happy in x place and feel that I’d be better off in y place. Work opportunities are abundant in y place and financially we will be much better off. As well as emotionally.

    My eldest son needs his father in y place now.

    It’s hard because the younger ones may be in the same position in 6 years. But I’ll have to cross that when it comes. As I have my eldest to think of too.

    My eldest son's father and I communicate, we have a friendship. The younger kids father makes me feel like I’m a bad mother. Whenever I try to communicate about healthcare costs he ignores me. I try and talk about the cost of starting school, clothes, shoes, etc. But he’s ignoring me because I enrolled them in the same school as my eldest son without chatting to him.

    But he wasn’t seeing them at the time and I wasn’t ever going to enroll them in a different school from their brother. So I feel as though we need to sort out the move and get his agreed time with kids set in a plan and move on. But he’s ignoring my emails about this too.

    I feel really deflated because I want to do what’s right for everyone. But it’s really hard to know what to do in this situation.
     
  6. sammy01

    sammy01 Well-Known Member

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    OK - not gonna like me...

    You 'want what is right for everyone' except the kids' dad...

    He doesn't communicate with you about school costs / medical costs because he doesn't have to...The child support system covers that...

    Your spiritual need to be here or there is a new argument in my experience... Not one I'd recommend you use in court...

    But you asked - I will answer...

    1 - Ask dad. If he says no...

    2 - Do mediation. If he says no...

    3 - Apply to court. Sometimes just the court application is enough for some people to re-negotiate. I not...

    4 - Hope a magistrate says yes.

    Chances he will? Impossible to say definitively without all the info and dad's side to the story. Assuming your version of the truth is close to the actual truth, then probably worth a shot.
     
  7. AllForHer

    AllForHer Well-Known Member

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    What's the distance between town x and town y?
     
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  8. Alchemy

    Alchemy Well-Known Member

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    Sammy I did say it’s a hard situation for everyone involved. Thanks for your help :)

    Allforher, it’s 4.5 hours drive.
     
  9. sammy01

    sammy01 Well-Known Member

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    4.5 hours... Ok so would you agree for the kids to spend one weekend a month with dad and 1/2 holidays? A magistrate would be likely to accept that.

    Yup, you did say it is a hard one for everyone. But some of the info you're providing, like his refusal to discuss school costs / medical is irrelevant to the relocation issue. So I'm only getting your side of the story here...

    So for example, he has been inconsistent... No worries. But if (and I'm not saying it is) but if his inconsistencies is because you have made it really hard for him to see the kids...well that changes things. True.

    So to help you understand my experience... My ex limited my time with the kids. I wanted 50/50... She would not agree and I didn't have the strength to take it through court. So we got an agreement where I had 4 nights a fortnight. She then reduced it to 3 for a while... Then tried to relocate with the kids and claim that my input in their lives was minimal.

    But hang on.... It was only minimal because she would not agree for me to have more time... So can you see where my perspective on this is coming from?

    You do have another option. Just move - it is risky... If dad took it to court, the fact that you moved without consent isn't a good look. But you could notify him that you're moving in 3 months and see if he does anything to stop you...
     
  10. Alchemy

    Alchemy Well-Known Member

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    I’ve suggested a week in school holidays. 2 over Xmas ones. Alternate Easter and Xmas with him.

    He comes to visit his family and kids at y place and I go back to x place once over the school terms to visit friends and family. FaceTime once a week and whenever they want to.

    We’ve been taking things slow since he’s reappeared in their lives but I’ve by no means been limiting his time. He requested one night a fortnight and I agreed.
     
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