I'm hoping to seek some help on my current situation as the help I see on here is quite good.
Background:
I have recently attended family court and obtained interim orders for access to my daughter (3-year-old) of 3 nights per fortnight, increasing to 4 nights from January. They are non-consecutive nights, Sunday and Tuesdays. The orders contain no information about holiday time either (we tried to negotiate on the day but my ex wouldn't enter into discussion and threatened to not sign the consent orders for the court to ratify if we continued to argue the point).
In court, I asked the judge to stop my ex taking our daughter to a psychologist she had taken her to on 3 occasions. I knew nothing of it and was not involved until my daughter told me she was going. The judge agreed immediately, stating it was not in the interest of a 3-year-old to be seeing a psychologist. Interestingly (and frustratingly), the judge then ordered a family report be done to ascertain if she still needed to attend one and for us to return to court in October.
My ex has emailed my solicitor asking us to vacate the October date as she now agrees that my daughter doesn't need to see the psychologist. From what I understand, if I vacate this, the next time I would get an opportunity to fight for more access (including holidays) would be at the trial call over, which the date has not be set yet. I believe we are in the trial list for some time in 2018. Prior to the call over, we would need to get a family report done.
We have said yes, we would be willing to do so by adjourning the date until June or the trial call over, whichever comes first. I don’t want to be left in a situation where I need to wait until August or later next year before I get a chance to increase time with my daughter and discuss holiday time and consecutive nights etc. FWIW, holidays are important as my family all live in Tasmania and I would love to visit them with her. We have raised this with my ex and she has flat out refused for me to have even 1 additional night for a 3 day holiday.
My ex has said no to adjourning and will only agree to vacate the date to trial call over.
My question is this – should I just attend the family report in August and raise some of these issues with the family reporter in the hope that they will report that I should have some increased time and holiday time?
We would also need to do a response affidavit to counter some of the outlandish and ridiculous things said within hers. Is it likely they would take time away from me and suggest different orders to the ones we have in place?
Or should I, as my solicitor suggest, vacate, knowing that it all likelihood, the call over will be around June anyway and that would mean we need to get a family report done in April/May. This would give me the benefit of having the FR done when I have 4 nights locked in with my daughter.
My solicitor feels that this would offer me the best chance of gaining additional time and arguing for holiday time. This would mean though that the current orders would stay in place until my daughter is at least 4. So no holiday time and no consecutive nights.
All I want is to make sure I can get to a 50/50 split of time. My ex is vehemently opposed to this and only ever wants me to have no more than 30%. She is doing everything in her power – moving 45 mins away etc – to make it as difficult as possible for me to get there. I understand I need to play a long game, but boy is it frustrating.
Sorry, it’s long, and still doesn't fully explain the situation but I've tried to keep to facts, with emotion left out.
I'm just looking for suggestions on what I might do? I'm not thrilled with the current interim orders and want to make sure I leave myself as much room as possible to continue fighting.
Background:
I have recently attended family court and obtained interim orders for access to my daughter (3-year-old) of 3 nights per fortnight, increasing to 4 nights from January. They are non-consecutive nights, Sunday and Tuesdays. The orders contain no information about holiday time either (we tried to negotiate on the day but my ex wouldn't enter into discussion and threatened to not sign the consent orders for the court to ratify if we continued to argue the point).
In court, I asked the judge to stop my ex taking our daughter to a psychologist she had taken her to on 3 occasions. I knew nothing of it and was not involved until my daughter told me she was going. The judge agreed immediately, stating it was not in the interest of a 3-year-old to be seeing a psychologist. Interestingly (and frustratingly), the judge then ordered a family report be done to ascertain if she still needed to attend one and for us to return to court in October.
My ex has emailed my solicitor asking us to vacate the October date as she now agrees that my daughter doesn't need to see the psychologist. From what I understand, if I vacate this, the next time I would get an opportunity to fight for more access (including holidays) would be at the trial call over, which the date has not be set yet. I believe we are in the trial list for some time in 2018. Prior to the call over, we would need to get a family report done.
We have said yes, we would be willing to do so by adjourning the date until June or the trial call over, whichever comes first. I don’t want to be left in a situation where I need to wait until August or later next year before I get a chance to increase time with my daughter and discuss holiday time and consecutive nights etc. FWIW, holidays are important as my family all live in Tasmania and I would love to visit them with her. We have raised this with my ex and she has flat out refused for me to have even 1 additional night for a 3 day holiday.
My ex has said no to adjourning and will only agree to vacate the date to trial call over.
My question is this – should I just attend the family report in August and raise some of these issues with the family reporter in the hope that they will report that I should have some increased time and holiday time?
We would also need to do a response affidavit to counter some of the outlandish and ridiculous things said within hers. Is it likely they would take time away from me and suggest different orders to the ones we have in place?
Or should I, as my solicitor suggest, vacate, knowing that it all likelihood, the call over will be around June anyway and that would mean we need to get a family report done in April/May. This would give me the benefit of having the FR done when I have 4 nights locked in with my daughter.
My solicitor feels that this would offer me the best chance of gaining additional time and arguing for holiday time. This would mean though that the current orders would stay in place until my daughter is at least 4. So no holiday time and no consecutive nights.
All I want is to make sure I can get to a 50/50 split of time. My ex is vehemently opposed to this and only ever wants me to have no more than 30%. She is doing everything in her power – moving 45 mins away etc – to make it as difficult as possible for me to get there. I understand I need to play a long game, but boy is it frustrating.
Sorry, it’s long, and still doesn't fully explain the situation but I've tried to keep to facts, with emotion left out.
I'm just looking for suggestions on what I might do? I'm not thrilled with the current interim orders and want to make sure I leave myself as much room as possible to continue fighting.