I have a toddler with my ex, and am having another baby via sperm donor. We live with my parents and I'm about to do my will so that they have control of my life insurance and also preference of guardianship for my kids. My question is, being that it's a sperm donor that's the second child's father, and I'm having this baby go to my parents in the event that I die, I don't want my children separated but this child is NOT going to my ex ( domestic violence issues). Is there anyway to stop the eldest from going to her father and therefore separating her from her sibling and from her grandparents who she's lived with her whole life to go to a man who she only spends 3hr a fortnight. In the even that I die ( custody of children). I think there'll be enough upheaval in their lives without taking her from her sibling and home.