Stepfather Took Money but Denies Doing So

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Littlezaksica

Member
4 October 2014
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Hi, I want an opinion regarding a matter that happened at home.

One day, when I was spending time with my mum downstairs, I heard and noticed a noise that I suspected was coming from my room. So I went and checked out what it was and found my stepfather in my room. When I confronted him and asked him why he was in my room. He told me that he was " just curious" and was trying to find out what I brought a few days ago.

At this point, I suspected he took something from my room because of the noise I heard, the way he acted (looks embarrassed about something) and it looks like he had something in his pocket. So when I asked him to show me his pocket, he refused and claim he didn't have anything in his pocket. Then he asked me to let him go and tried to get out of my room. I didn't let him at first, but he forced himself out by pushing me out of the way and he went to his room.

Afterwards, I checked around my room and found an amount of money missing (theft). So I confronted him about it afterwards and he denies it and said I have no proof. What can I do?

The money missing was from a container I have in my room (like a piggybank, but can be opened without breaking it). I knew exactly how much was in the container so I could found out if money is missing if I counted them up. I have a picture taken of the amount I have in that container (Although the picture it is 5 months old).

Do I have a case? Do I have any ground of evidences that support my claim?
 

steven264

Active Member
4 October 2014
7
1
34
you have no evidence, but it sounds like your stepfather has a drug or gambling problem, and wouldn't pressing charges make living there untenable. just hide your money better and steal off him at any opportunity. and how old are you? he shouldn't be in your room anyway I'd tell your mother.
 

Littlezaksica

Member
4 October 2014
3
0
1
I'm an adult, The primary income in the household is my mother, and I am the only other person with an reliable income within the family. My stepfather does not have a very irregular job as he is semi retired. He does not (as far as I am aware) have any drug or gambling problem. So I am certain we can do without him. But truthfully, I was not intending to get this in to a legal situation, but more about seeking advice to see where I would stand legally, because when I confronted him, he more or less threaten me to prevent me of questioning him and said I could be making a false acquisition against him.

So I can not do anything then? I am guessing it would not be wise to confront him about it any more then? but I would really love to make him admit to his wrong and apologise for it, because I hate to live with a person that I could not trust, respect, and be this shameless to deny right in front of my face (he is acting like nothing happens).
 

AllForHer

Well-Known Member
23 July 2014
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you have no evidence, but it sounds like your stepfather has a drug or gambling problem, and wouldn't pressing charges make living there untenable. just hide your money better and steal off him at any opportunity. and how old are you? he shouldn't be in your room anyway I'd tell your mother.

OP, this is by far the worst advice I have seen on this forum. Whatever your situation or feelings, do not, under any circumstances, commit a crime by 'stealing from him at every opportunity'. Vigilante justice is not the best, or even an acceptable choice for anybody. What a ridiculous thing to tell another person.

So, what are your options? As stealing is a criminal offence, you can report a theft to the police station. If they deem your case worth pursuing based on the information you provide, they will commence an investigation and proceedings on your behalf.
 
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steven264

Active Member
4 October 2014
7
1
34
OP, this is by far the worst advice I have seen on this forum. Whatever your situation or feelings, do not, under any circumstances, commit a crime by 'stealing from him at every opportunity'. Vigilante justice is not the best, or even an acceptable choice for anybody. What a ridiculous thing to tell another person.

So, what are your options? As stealing is a criminal offence, you can report a theft to the police station. If they deem your case worth pursuing based on the information you provide, they will commence an investigation and proceedings on your behalf.
sorry that was a typo, It should have read hide your money better, and avoid him at every opportunity- damn IPHONE5 autocorrect again
 

Rod

Lawyer
LawTap Verified
27 May 2014
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Maybe have a quiet sit down with him when no-one else is around and say that you are hurt by his actions. Say that your respect him has taken a hit and that you'd like to know why he did what he did. Do not be confrontational or he will likely not admit to anything. Say you want to clear the air and that you want to try and make things work for your mum's sake.

You can take the legal route, and if you do, it is largely taken out of your hands by the police. They will decide if there is enough evidence to charge him. Though the consequences of this path on the family dynamics are impossible for me to predict, there is the potential for a permanent rupture to occur in any of the relationships, and not always the way you expect. Proceed carefully.
 

Littlezaksica

Member
4 October 2014
3
0
1
Thanks guys for all the advice!

Rod, that is pretty much what I did, minus the "do not be confrontational" bit, I couldn't really help myself because of all the excuses and lies his was making to try to cover it up. I have also assured him that I would never take any legal action against him and just wanted to clear it out between me and him. In fact, he was the one who has said to me multiple times to watch what I am saying (or about to say) and threatens me that he might take legal action towards me (for falsely accusing him).

What bothers me the most is that outside of our confrontations, he is so shameless that he is acting like nothing had happened at all! He believes that just cause I did not have actual proof (even though I could practically see and hear it from his pocket) that he stole from me, and gave me the lamest excuse for being in my room, he had talked himself out of it. I also have evidence that his excuse is a lie! Does this put me in a much better position in a legal situation? because I could question the validity of his statement (although there are no official statements and just here-say at this point).
 

Rod

Lawyer
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27 May 2014
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that is pretty much what I did, minus the "do not be confrontational" bit

That's why it is best done some days later when you have had a chance to settle down. Maybe try again.

Does this put me in a much better position in a legal situation?

Helps, but it is the police that decide that. My experience with police in these types of cases is that much depends on the individual police that take the report. :(
 

AllForHer

Well-Known Member
23 July 2014
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I wouldn't bank too much on a legal outcome for this because the bottom line is that you don't have proof. You have suspicion. Theft is an indictable offence - they're not likely to record a conviction for an indictable offence based on suspicion.

Like I said, though, you could just report the theft to the police. At least it would be on record in case you ever did gain proof.