VIC Family Law Rights of a Child Regarding Visitations?

[Sammy99]

I will be 17 in just under a month, and would like to know if I have any rights to refuse to see my mother.

I currently live with my father, and every holiday break my mother insists on me spending one week with her and the other with my father. I do not always want to spend such a long time with her, and sometimes I'm too busy or stressed to commute down to Melbourne to see her.

During the Christmas break my parents also have been rotating turns on what family we spend the actual holiday with, so the majority of my holidays are spent with whatever side of the family they have agreed on. Mother also insists that however they plan my holidays will mean that my two younger sisters will be spending the whole break with me.

I'll be honest, I don't have the best relationship with either of my parents or sisters, and sometimes I'd like to just spend a few days visiting without my sisters, but every time I try to mention this to my parents they get angry at me for not wanting to be with my sisters.

I also have no information on what legal agreement my parents have made regarding where I stay or how long I visit who.

To put it simply, can I refuse to spend time with my mother and/or ask for time to spend with either parent away from my siblings as a 17 year old. Will I have to wait until I'm 18, and when I turn 18, what will my legal rights be under family law regarding my parents?

 

[AllForHer]

If they have a parenting order, it's technically in force until you're 18, but in practice, most parents find the closer to a child's 18th birthday they get, the more unenforceable a parenting order becomes.

Let's say you decide not to visit in accordance with their parenting order. The only option mum has is to file a contravention order against dad in Court. The Court, however, is chaired by very intelligent and realistic people, and they quite well know that eventually, kids will vote with their feet about their best interests.

So, in hearing this contravention order application, the Court can change existing parenting orders, and it is bound to act only in the child's best interests, as described in the Family Law Act.

One of the most pertinent factors the Court will consider in your case is your own views. Being 17, it's extremely unlikely the Court would deviate from your wishes anyway, and it's also worth noting that by the time this contravention order is even heard, you will most likely have reached the age of majority, which places you outside of the Family Court's jurisdiction.

Also of note is that state police can't force you to do anything in respect of your parents.

So, in short, if mum files for a contravention order because you refuse to spend time with her, the most likely outcomes, in my view, are that she will either end up with an "in accordance with the child's wishes" order, or you'll be 18 before the contravention order is made.

Let's be real, though. Mum probably isn't going to take dad back to Court over this, is she?

 

[Sammy99]

If they have a parenting order, it's technically in force until you're 18, but in practice, most parents find the closer to a child's 18th birthday they get, the more unenforceable a parenting order becomes.

Let's say you decide not to visit in accordance with their parenting order. The only option mum has is to file a contravention order against dad in Court. The Court, however, is chaired by very intelligent and realistic people, and they quite well know that eventually, kids will vote with their feet about their best interests.

So, in hearing this contravention order application, the Court can change existing parenting orders, and it is bound to act only in the child's best interests, as described in the Family Law Act.

One of the most pertinent factors the Court will consider in your case is your own views. Being 17, it's extremely unlikely the Court would deviate from your wishes anyway, and it's also worth noting that by the time this contravention order is even heard, you will most likely have reached the age of majority, which places you outside of the Family Court's jurisdiction.

Also of note is that state police can't force you to do anything in respect of your parents.

So, in short, if mum files for a contravention order because you refuse to spend time with her, the most likely outcomes, in my view, are that she will either end up with an "in accordance with the child's wishes" order, or you'll be 18 before the contravention order is made.

Let's be real, though. Mum probably isn't going to take dad back to Court over this, is she?

Thank you so much for your insight! This is very helpful!

 

[sammy01]

Ok - so you only have about a year left.... why not just take one for the team... Play happy families.

That said - nothing stopping you from saying "Not going...' But use this one cautiously.

Mate think long term, you might need help from your folks down the track, they are the people most likely to give you that help too. They might not have been the best parents in the world but they are your parents.

While you can technically do whatever you want at your age. You might be causing yourself, and your folks more stress than you realised by refusing.

 

[MartyK]

I'll be honest, I don't have the best relationship with either of my parents or sisters, and sometimes I'd like to just spend a few days visiting without my sisters, but every time I try to mention this to my parents they get angry at me for not wanting to be with my sisters.

Unfortunately, some parents can have a tough time accepting that their children are growing up. I would think any request at your age, for some one on one time with your mother, especially when you only see her during the holidays, could be very positive for both of you.

I also have no information on what legal agreement my parents have made regarding where I stay or how long I visit who.

You are not alone here Sammy99. Parents are to some extent 'gagged' from discussing Court matters with their kids.

To put it simply, can I refuse to spend time with my mother and/or ask for time to spend with either parent away from my siblings as a 17 year old. Will I have to wait until I'm 18, and when I turn 18, what will my legal rights be under family law regarding my parents?

Yes you can and unless there were compelling reasons to order otherwise, like said in the above posts, a Judge would be very reluctant to force anyone your age to spend time with a parent. This would also be the case for teens a bit younger than you.

Like all kids your age, asserting your independence comes with the territory, and is expected. I wouldn't say toe the line to keep the peace, but I would say, just think carefully about the battles you choose to have. If this is one you truely believe needs to be had, so be it!