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Does My Boyfriend Need to Give His Ex My Address?

Discussion in 'Family Law Forum' started by TmG413, 21 July 2014.

  1. TmG413

    TmG413 Member

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    I have been with my boyfriend for 18 months. I live in my house with my two children.

    Some nights he will stay with me, otherwise he lives at his parent's house. He sees his child regularly, when he has his child he stays at his parents. He occasionally comes to my house so our children can play together (our boys are the same age).

    One one occasion, his son slept over my house with him (and shared a room with my son).
    His ex partner is now demanding my address and saying she has a right to have it. There are currently no legal family law orders in place.

    Is there any legal obligation whereby she is entitled to know where I live?

    I told my boyfriend originally I didn't mind her having it, but her behaviour over the weekend has changed my mind on this. She started interogating and bullying me, asking about "what approaches use to discipline", asking about the model car I drive, what work I do, where my boyfriend (her ex partner) lives.
    She asked if I was aware of what "legally constituted de facto "Living Together"" and said if she notifies "the authorities" of what he is doing, I will "get in trouble too". At one point she started interrogating my five year old, asking how often my boyfriend sees him, sleeps over etc.

    We are all trying to avoid going to Court and having things get ugly. I am just trying to find out what information (if any) she is entitled to, and what legislation is there that I can direct her to so that she doesn't keep pushing us on the issue.

    Thanking you in advance.
     
  2. AllForHer

    AllForHer Well-Known Member

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    The short answer is no, he doesn't have to tell her where you live, nor does she have any right to know. In fact, under the Family Law Act 1975, parents have no rights at all. Only children do.

    For your sanity, though, the way that my partner and I dealt with the same questions from his ex was to politely inform her that if she could point to where this 'right to know' was expressed in legislation, we would happily divulge to her the information she was seeking. Given that I study law, the game ended pretty quickly after that.

    Now, if consent orders or parenting orders were instated, it is still unlikely that he would have to tell her where you live while ever you're not living together, because visits like the one you've described fall under the classification of a 'day-to-day decision', which is a standard order made by the courts in most parenting matters. That is, he is responsible for day-to-day decisions while the child is in his care, and she is responsible for day-to-day decisions while the child is in her care.

    If you were living together, that would be a different story - he would likely have to tell her his address, and by way of association, yours as well.

    Another thing for you to consider is that she has no say about whether or not you move in together while ever no orders exist. If he was the primary carer, the only restriction on his right to freedom of movement is that he would not be able to relocate to a place that would make it significantly harder for the child to have a relationship with the other parent. Beyond that, it would take a great deal of evidence and commitment on her part to exercise any power over your shared decision to move in together - unless she can prove you're a genuine danger to the child, her input is null and void.

    For the record, however, her behaviour does constitute stalking, especially if you have not given your consent for her to contact you directly. Make sure you keep a diary of all incidents, marked with date, time and details. It's difficult to predict where these kinds of situations might end up going.
     
  3. TmG413

    TmG413 Member

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    Thank you so much for your response and insight. It's greatly appreciated!
     
  4. AllForHer

    AllForHer Well-Known Member

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    That's not legal advice, by the way. Just saying. :)
     

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