Hi there,
I was hoping someone may be able to help me. I will do my best to be concise and document the main points of this (very long) story.
My husband was involved in a very short relationship with a woman approximately seven years ago, before we had met. This relationship lasted about eight weeks; the woman became extremely psychologically and physically abusive, resulting in the police being called twice to remove her from his home, his vehicle purposely damaged by her and a stay in hospital after he attempted suicide. She has/had aspirations to work in medicine, so she begged him not to file an AVO and he did not. They broke up. Now, the main points:
- She informed him a few weeks after the break-up that she was pregnant. She has a history of lying and was not believed at first, especially as she allegedly had a medical condition that meant she could not get pregnant. However, she later proved it.
- My husband questioned paternity at the time, and she admitted he was one of a couple of possible fathers.
- The baby is born; she gets in contact asking for cash, but refuses to grant a paternity test despite being asked multiple times.
- We endure three years of sporadic threats, guilt trips and repeated denial of a test. My husband eventually stops responding. She goes silent for about a year.
- In December 2018, a child support application is received. He is not on the birth certificate and questioned paternity. Just before Christmas, a notice stating the application was refused is received.
- According to LegalAid's website, the applicant had 56 days to appeal. This was not done.
- Today, a LegalAid letter is received asking my husband to agree to a paternity test, or he "may" be taken to court.
Now, my questions:
- My husband has given her multiple opportunities, for years, to get a test done. There is no guarantee she will follow through with the process now. He is sick of wasting time and having contact with this unwell and possibly dangerous person. What happens if she doesn't show up?
- She had 56 days to appeal the child support application rejection. This is well overdue; why is there a time limit if she can still proceed with court etc. more than 150 days later? Does backpay come into it if the application was previously rejected?
- My husband has a lot of evidence of her abuse in the form of text messages, police reports and letters. Could he still get an AVO? (We understand that an AVO against the mother isn't an "out" for child support, that would still be paid if he was actually the father. It is just not at all good for his mental health to keep this contact going).
If you got this far, thank you for reading. I appreciate any clarity that can be provided. This has been a huge strain for him (and to a lesser extent, our family life) and it just never seems to go away. We are expecting a child and there is a possibility we will move temporarily to Singapore for my job next year.
I was hoping someone may be able to help me. I will do my best to be concise and document the main points of this (very long) story.
My husband was involved in a very short relationship with a woman approximately seven years ago, before we had met. This relationship lasted about eight weeks; the woman became extremely psychologically and physically abusive, resulting in the police being called twice to remove her from his home, his vehicle purposely damaged by her and a stay in hospital after he attempted suicide. She has/had aspirations to work in medicine, so she begged him not to file an AVO and he did not. They broke up. Now, the main points:
- She informed him a few weeks after the break-up that she was pregnant. She has a history of lying and was not believed at first, especially as she allegedly had a medical condition that meant she could not get pregnant. However, she later proved it.
- My husband questioned paternity at the time, and she admitted he was one of a couple of possible fathers.
- The baby is born; she gets in contact asking for cash, but refuses to grant a paternity test despite being asked multiple times.
- We endure three years of sporadic threats, guilt trips and repeated denial of a test. My husband eventually stops responding. She goes silent for about a year.
- In December 2018, a child support application is received. He is not on the birth certificate and questioned paternity. Just before Christmas, a notice stating the application was refused is received.
- According to LegalAid's website, the applicant had 56 days to appeal. This was not done.
- Today, a LegalAid letter is received asking my husband to agree to a paternity test, or he "may" be taken to court.
Now, my questions:
- My husband has given her multiple opportunities, for years, to get a test done. There is no guarantee she will follow through with the process now. He is sick of wasting time and having contact with this unwell and possibly dangerous person. What happens if she doesn't show up?
- She had 56 days to appeal the child support application rejection. This is well overdue; why is there a time limit if she can still proceed with court etc. more than 150 days later? Does backpay come into it if the application was previously rejected?
- My husband has a lot of evidence of her abuse in the form of text messages, police reports and letters. Could he still get an AVO? (We understand that an AVO against the mother isn't an "out" for child support, that would still be paid if he was actually the father. It is just not at all good for his mental health to keep this contact going).
If you got this far, thank you for reading. I appreciate any clarity that can be provided. This has been a huge strain for him (and to a lesser extent, our family life) and it just never seems to go away. We are expecting a child and there is a possibility we will move temporarily to Singapore for my job next year.
