NSW Chances of custody and relocation to Sunshine coast

[Jd91]

Hi all, my partner has an almost 4 year old boy to her ex. Basically the relationship between them was toxic from the start, there has been issues of the father not being paying childcare fees, ripping the boy out of my partners arms in front of her work and him constantly trying to put limits on what she can do and who the son is to be around. Once they separated he has stated that it was to be 3 nights about, which continued for approximately 6 months, she agreed to this out of fear. She's was in the cycle of domestic violence, minimising all of his behaviours etc.
There are now interim orders in place for week about, however each time the son comes back to us he is unwashed, fingernails are red raw and he is constantly talking about ghosts etc, the father isn't able to separate the way he talks to adults and to his son and puts a lot of pressure on him to comply with his demands.
My partner has never moved out of the region but has been offered a place at university in Queensland, where my family also reside and would like to pursue a career as she found out she was pregnant when due to commence in 2013.We obviously want to take the boy to live with us and have proposed paying for all
travel for him to spend time with his father.
We intend to have more children and that is where we would want to raise them.
There is also a lot of evidence from him stating he wanted to move to the same region.
We have a family reporter coming in to do an assessment and are nervous that the father and his mother who is well known to be a long time drug user and dealer will put their best foot forward and try and bluff their way through this.

My partner even in the midst of being constantly abused and controlled, has always made an effort to be civil with father and making effort on Father's Day birthdays etc, he didn't even allow her to speak to the son on her birthday or Mother's Day.

Does anyone have any suggestion on what the outcome will likely be? I understand it is quite complex.

 

[sammy01]

relocation cases are very hard to pick.
Your best bet is to ask dad if he wantsto move and organise it so that you wind up living in close proximity. So I'm guessing you guys don't have a lazy $20 000 OR MORE to run a case through court? And risk getting knocked back? hence wasting the $$$

'Evidence' from him saying he wants to move there really isn't all that rock solid.

What would the likely outcome be? You will blow ten's of thousands of $$$. Chances of getting the outcome you want? I would not bet $20 on you succeeding.

It isn't going to go well to go to court and all of a sudden try and make claims that he is a bad / neglectful father.... Stuff like him not letting the kid speak to mum on her birthday contributes towards proving he is an arse. Doesn't prove you should be able to move hours away...

So the whole reason for moving... Uni? most courses can be done on-line or there might be a uni closer... So it isn't a great starting point.

 

[AllForHer]

You haven't actually listed any behaviours that constitute abuse in a context that the Family Court would really be concerned by, so...

Relocation matters are difficult to predict, but here's my view of the facts.

Child is four years of age, has been in equal care arrangements, which both parents agreed to, for at least six months, which is a significant portion of the child's life, so child has established relationships with both parents and both parents are equally involved in his care.

Mum has been living in region for a long time, only genuine reason to move is because she's been offered a place at University. I'm guessing there are Universities closer to where she's living now or ones around Australia whereby she can study off-campus. Your family being in Queensland and your intention to raise your own kids in Queensland is irrelevant, the Court is concerned with the existing child, not you or your prospective children. Indeed, sounds like most of the children's paternal family, at least, is nearby where he's living now.

I would say the Court is just as likely to order that the child remain living with the father if mum wants to relocate. Dad might even be able to argue that the child's relationship with him will be at risk due to lack of support and encouragement in your household. I mean, you're critical of the child's fingernails. My six-year-old stepdaughter has unwashed fingernails because...well, she's six, and she also talks about things like ghosts, and elves and fairies, also because she's six. If you demonise dad over matters that are kid things, rather than negligent parent things, the family report writer is going to have a field day with you.

 

[Lennon]

Relocation cases are hard for a reason. The consequences for the children involved are usually enormous.

My DP's ex moved States after they separated. My DP now sees his kids once or twice a year, if he's lucky, We are in the FCC at the moment trying to improve that.

Meanwhile, his kids are missing out on the benefit of a normal relationship with their father (who they adore) because their mum prioritised living closer to her own mum (who she rarely ever sees now that she has moved there anyway) over the kids' relationship with their father.

In the absence of abuse or neglect, there are very few things that are more important to children than the ability to spend time with and have a relationship with both of their parents.

If your SS is in a shared care arrangement, with your partner's consent, the court is very unlikely to accept that she genuinely believes that he is being abused or neglected by his father, and will look very unfavourably on her making those allegations now (at exactly the same time that she wants to relocate).

You haven't said where you currently live, how much travel will be involved for your SS, how often you propose he spend time with his dad, who will accompany him on the travel etc. Those factors would all be considered by the court.

 

[Hoang Trang]

What can some of the consequences be for a parent who makes false allegations of violence, drug use and neglect of children against the other primary care parent? Every case is different but can the residences of a child be changed back due to this?