NSW Possible to Dispute AVO?

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AUCP

Member
13 January 2017
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The police served me an AVO and as these things go, you don't get to respond and suddenly you are in court.

My ex-girlfriend left her previous boyfriend for me. We lived together straight away starting Jan 14 in a house that was $825 a week. I paid for everything, rent, utilities, bills for the whole duration of our lease. All the furniture there is mine. We broke up in August but she stayed with me because she had no job. I continued to take care of her as we struggled to move on. In October, I told her not to talk to me anymore and I started sleeping at my sister's house a few times. She called me 14 times at work and won't stop messaging me all day. In November, I went overseas while she stayed at the house that i continued to pay for. I was ok with this because I cared for her. I told her again not to contact me unless necessary. She still did and said she was having trouble coping without me.

In Dec, I was running out of funds and needed to talk to her about starting to pay rent. I kept msging for a time to talk, no response. So I called more times. She didn't return my calls. Bear in mind she was still living at our house with my dog. I was still overseas and rent was due so I got desperate. I kept calling. Even called work reception 3 times. Eventually at the end of the day she agreed to call me and we had a good chat. She agreed to pay rent and we agreed to no contact unless necessary. The next day she called me talking about her work and how she hadn't been paid and asked if I can I cover it. And so I had to make it work somehow.

Eventually I came back to Sydney but did not go to the residence. A few days later, I dropped by our house to drop off some stuff. That's when I saw her with her ex. I didn't interrupt as he was already leaving. After he left, I walked up and said Hi. I dropped the stuff off and turned around and started walking. But I didn't want her to think that I was angry. I wanted her to know it's all ok. I turned around and stood at the door and calmly said, I don't want to leave like this can we talk? She tried to close the door but I blocked it with my foot. I was still very calm at this stage and I thought if I persisted a little more I can fix the situation. In any case, I felt I still had a right to be at the property as we are both on the lease and she had not paid a cent of rent at that point. Eventually she said she would open the door but she didn't and called a mutual friend instead. I waited for the friend, went for a walk and had a good talk with her. Then I left. An hour and a half later the police called me asking me to go to the police station.

Having read the AVO from the police, she clearly said that she had no fears that I would physically harm her. But the police served me anyway because she made up a story where we broke up in March, I moved out in June and have been calling, texting her nonstop ever since even after she told me not to. The only proof she showed were my msgs when i contacted her at work. They took all this and thought it would escalate and I would hurt her.

Even though I have no intention of contacting her, I take pride in my reputation and my record is important in my field. I do not want an AVO. I want to show my evidence to the police to refute everything hoping that if they see it they will withdraw before the hearing. Is this possible? Has this happened before?
 

Iamthelaw

Well-Known Member
13 September 2016
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My ex-girlfriend left her previous boyfriend for me. We lived together straight away starting Jan 14 in a house that was $825 a week.
Your first mistake.

I paid for everything, rent, utilities, bills for the whole duration of our lease. All the furniture there is mine. We broke up in August but she stayed with me because she had no job. I continued to take care of her as we struggled to move on.
Your second mistake.

Anyways, you say that the police have charged you? What have the police charged you with? Stalking? I understand that one would be keen to get in the box and tell their side of the story and contest the AVO but if there is a pending charge/charges this would be advised against. Understand that an AVO does not go on your record and only breaching it will become a criminal matter.

In terms of the AVO, you have 3 options:

1 - Consent without admission: You consent to the order made without making any admission and spare being cross-examined. This is not taken to be that you're admitting to what she's alleged at all. (The preferred route if there is a pending charge).

2 - Contest the order: You will be cross-examined about the incident(s) and have allegations put to you. You'll also get to tell your side of the story. You may still end up with an AVO against you, then again you may not.

3 - Undertaking: Usually occurs in cross applications but there is no order made against either party but both give undertakings to refrain from certain behaviour. Probably not applicable in your scenario.
 
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Tim W

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Subject to many ifs, buts and maybes,
there is a lot to be said for consenting to an order - if only because
it contributes to the impression that you are
sane and sensible and non-combative.
 

AUCP

Member
13 January 2017
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1
There are no charges. I really don't want an AVO on my record after everything I've done for her. I am fully supportive of no contact but the AVO is a risk I am not willing to take. If she can lie so much to get an AVO, I can't trust that she wont lie to report a breach.

So I decided to not consent.

Update: I asked the police officer if I've been served all statements and evidence and they said I have been. There is no evidence in particular, just her statement. I told her I have evidence to refute her statements and provide background to the messages they were shown. I have similar messages she sent me. I also told her that I have hired a lawyer and will be putting in a request to withdraw.

The officer in charge then called me yesterday asking me to come in to explain my side of the story. My lawyer said this is a bit odd and they may be setting me up for criminal charges! Him and I will discuss on Monday if I should go given I have already written my statements and gathered all my evidence. If I do go on Tuesday, my lawyer will be present with me.

Will keep you posted.
 

Rod

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27 May 2014
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She tried to close the door but I blocked it with my foot.

This alone is enough for an AVO. Hopefully she hasn't got this in her statement.

Recommend you get her out of your apartment, or take police and get your stuff out. I tend to agree with your solicitor, you may be being set up for a fall. Get the ex out of your life asap. Are you still paying the rent, when does the lease finish?
 

MartyK

Well-Known Member
4 June 2016
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I told her I have evidence to refute her statements and provide background to the messages they were shown. I have similar messages she sent me. I also told her that I have hired a lawyer and will be putting in a request to withdraw.

Did this contact occur before or after you "read the AVO from the police"? If after, it may explain why they want to see you?
 

AUCP

Member
13 January 2017
3
0
1
Sorry when I said 'she', I was referring to the constable. I haven't had any contact with my ex.

My ex is supposed to move out today. I hope she's not there when I come tomorrow.

Yes, I did block the door with my foot. She does have it in her statement, but I was outside and she was in my house. I thought it was OK for me to have access to it. If she didn't want to talk to me, she could go to her room or leave I guess. Not sure if that makes a difference.

She had not paid a cent of rent or anything.