NSW Need help with recovery order related questions

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adi

Well-Known Member
1 April 2020
29
0
121
Hi friends,

I have applied for parenting order (interim and final orders) in Family Court of Australia and first court date is 21 April. My ex wife is not allowing me to meet my daughter or sending her to spend time with me since 16/02/2020. Prior to this I was having my daughter for 2 days a week (Friday morning till Sunday morning). Everyday I send her SMS to resolve the issues and allow me and my daughter to meet and I get muted response. I miss my daughter and I feel the court process will take long and I will lose time with my daughter.

Now my question is can I apply for recovery orders and will that help me get my daughter coming home as per previous arrangement till court looks into parenting order? What are some of the things I need to keep in mind when preparing affidavit etc. and if anyone can guide/explain the process I will appreciate it a lot.

I am seeking equal time order (50%) as part of parenting orders.

I daily speak to my daughter on phone and this is the only communication I have with her.

Please help me friends.

Thank you,
Adithya
 

sammy01

Well-Known Member
27 September 2015
4,100
584
2,894
how old is your child?
do you have court orders?
Do you have a solicitor?
 

adi

Well-Known Member
1 April 2020
29
0
121
how old is your child?
do you have court orders?
Do you have a solicitor?
Thanks a lot for your reply Sammy01.

My daughter is 8.4 years old. I don't have any court orders in place. I have applied for parenting orders and first date in court (directions hearing ) is on 21 April.
I am self representing, do not have a solicitor.
 

adi

Well-Known Member
1 April 2020
29
0
121
Can you also please me understand if I already have a parenting order application, if I want to apply for recover order, should I create a new "initiating an application" or "application in a case under existing parenting order"?
 

Jake Matherson

Well-Known Member
15 June 2018
223
29
659
Hey Adi,

I am assuming that the child is safe in the care of the mother(and yourself) no immediate risk of physical/sexual harm or excessive drug use problems.

You have 0% chance of getting a recovery Order unless there is an immediate threat of the child being taken overseas and not returning. I wouldn't waste your time on that.
 

adi

Well-Known Member
1 April 2020
29
0
121
Can you also please me understand if I already have a parenting order application, if I want to apply for recover order, should I create a new "initiating an application" or "application in a case under existing parenting order"?
Thanks Jake. Yes, my daughter is safe in the care of her mother and there is no immediate threat of any kind.
With long drawn our court process and my wife not allowing me to meet my daughter or send my daughter to me as per previously existing arrangements (verbal), what recourse do I have? All I can do is wait for court orders and not see my daughter for months?
When school was still running, I had gone to meet my daughter there as its public place. 2 days I met my daughter before start of school. Third day, when I was waiting Principal came and told me my daughter is in her room with mum and she is distressed and saying she does not want to see me. As there is no court orders in place she cant stop me from coming to school but she cant allow a distressed child to meet me either. I said I understand you are doing your job and I don't want my daughter to be distress either and said I wont come to school.
I speak to my daughter on phone everyday and after few days when I asked her about this, she said she didnt say to the Principal she didnt want to meet me. Seems like my ex is using her time with my daughter to pressurise her and alienate me.
Please advise what other recourse I have to speed up the process to meet my daughter? I am worried as time passes, my daughter will be told lot of bad things which will impact my relationship with her :(
 

Jake Matherson

Well-Known Member
15 June 2018
223
29
659
Adi,
Sadly, yes. All you can do is wait.

Many many people on this page including myself have gone extended periods of time without seeing their children. In my case the longest i went was 4 months while waiting for court and others longer.

Many people on here don't even get a phone call like yourself. It is hard, and takes far too long. Nothing in Family Court is fast. But you must be patient and not do anything to jeopardise your position.

Rest assured when you do make it to court for your interim hearing the Registrar/Judge you will have some time with your child awarded to you. It might not be exactly what you want but it will be something. Ideally you and your ex will agree outside of the courtroom and make things a lot easier. But for now you just wait.

DO NOT TALK ABOUT COURT MATTERS WITH YOUR CHILD. That's adult stuff.

There are plenty of services and sites out there if you need to talk to someone. Just stay focused and don't do anything stupid to cause you to get a DVO put on you.
 

adi

Well-Known Member
1 April 2020
29
0
121
Thanks Jake. Yes, my daughter is safe in the care of her mother and there is no immediate threat of any kind.
With long drawn our court process and my wife not allowing me to meet my daughter or send my daughter to me as per previously existing arrangements (verbal), what recourse do I have? All I can do is wait for court orders and not see my daughter for months?
When school was still running, I had gone to meet my daughter there as its public place. 2 days I met my daughter before start of school. Third day, when I was waiting Principal came and told me my daughter is in her room with mum and she is distressed and saying she does not want to see me. As there is no court orders in place she cant stop me from coming to school but she cant allow a distressed child to meet me either. I said I understand you are doing your job and I don't want my daughter to be distress either and said I wont come to school.
I speak to my daughter on phone everyday and after few days when I asked her about this, she said she didnt say to the Principal she didnt want to meet me. Seems like my ex is using her time with my daughter to pressurise her and alienate me.
Please advise what other recourse I have to speed up the process to meet my daughter? I am worried as time passes, my daughter will be told lot of bad things which will impact my relationship with her :(
Thanks Jake, I will make sure I will not jeopardise my position - good to know what others have been through, helps me keep grounded. Thanks for advising that I should not discuss court matters with my child. Court proceedings have not started, I will keep this in mind.

When I do speak to my daughter on phone, I do ask her if she wants to come home, misses me, did she tell school principal if she didnt want to meet me, etc, in a very nice calm way to record the conversation in case I need to use it in court to demonstrate that my daughter and I have good relationship and she does miss me too but when her mum pressurises she says something else infront of others. Is this something that is okay?
 

Jake Matherson

Well-Known Member
15 June 2018
223
29
659
My opinion is what you are doing is not okay.

Your child loves you no matter what of course they want to come see you, you are causing stress on your child.

No judge is going to listen to your recorded conversations between you and the child. Stop doing this.

As proceedings progress it is extremely likely you will be Ordered to undertake a Family Report (google it). During this report you will be interviewed by a family consultant for +1 hour and then they will bring the child in the room and watch how you interact with your child. Your ex will be in the other room and will have the same experience.

The family consultant will write a report/recommendation and the court will basically follow that recommendation. It is extremely important that you do well during this interview. Search family report on this site and google and you will find others asking questions about them and explanations.

This is your opportunity to show you have a good relationship with your daughter. Not a phone recording of you asking her leading questions and her answering in a way that makes her father happy.
 

adi

Well-Known Member
1 April 2020
29
0
121
Thanks Jake, I will make sure I will not jeopardise my position - good to know what others have been through, helps me keep grounded. Thanks for advising that I should not discuss court matters with my child. Court proceedings have not started, I will keep this in mind.

When I do speak to my daughter on phone, I do ask her if she wants to come home, misses me, did she tell school principal if she didnt want to meet me, etc, in a very nice calm way to record the conversation in case I need to use it in court to demonstrate that my daughter and I have good relationship and she does miss me too but when her mum pressurises she says something else infront of others. Is this something that is okay?
Thanks a lot Jake for your inputs. I will focus on "family report". I understand where you are coming from and its good to know early what I shouldn't do. I thank you for your feedback