WA Family Violence Restraining Order

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Sarah1983

Active Member
21 January 2018
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I have recently had a Family Violence Restraining Order placed on me by a lying, cheating, manipulative ex and his new girlfriend. The only purpose of this order is to prevent me from exposing his lies to his new girlfriend (who he was cheating on me with for four months before we broke up, then cheating on her with me after we broke up). Obviously neither of us knew about the other. Yes I overdid the texts and calls but after five years made it clear all I wanted was one conversation and then we could all move on with our lives. Rather than give me that respect he took this order out on me to protect the lies he was telling his new girlfriend. I don't care about the order, I just want to move on with my life, but there are things I feel his family have the right to know about his behaviour. Is it in breach of the order if I contact his family members?
 

sammy01

Well-Known Member
27 September 2015
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yes contacting his family would be a breach of the avo... It would appear vindictive... So you wrote... " I don't care about the order, I just want to move on with my life"
IF you don't care and you just want to get on with your life - then do it... Contacting his family is the exact opposite of that.. and would be more than enough to see u infront of a magistrate and - the ex is a bastard and I just want his parents to know it is not going to hold water in court...

So you see how easy it was for him to get the avo? how easy do you think it would be to get you done for breach of avo? and if that happened jail is a real possibility.
 

Sarah1983

Active Member
21 January 2018
11
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31
If that is the case then that should be stated more clearly in the order. There is no mention of being unable to contact persons other than him and his new girlfriend. I also can't find any information online stating that. How can I be held in breach of the order if that information is nowhere to be found? When I was served with the order this information also wasn't mentioned. Clearly I'm asking the question because I don't want to risk it, but not everyone would think to investigate further.
 

sammy01

Well-Known Member
27 September 2015
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so don't mention your name.... But if you want please write the conditions of the order and I'll try and show you where on the order it clearly states that you must not contact him, or anyone related to him... I'm sure you'll find it on the order
 

Sarah1983

Active Member
21 January 2018
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The only part that I feel even slightly refers to it is 'you must not harass the person protected by any electronic means, including by using the internet and any social network application to depict or refer in any offensive manner to the person protected'.

The rest refers solely to the individual. And I guess I'm curious as to what constitutes offensive? If I'm not insulting him or using derogatory language, but merely stating facts, how can that be considered offensive?
 

sammy01

Well-Known Member
27 September 2015
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no dont' bother... Just read the thing.. It says that you can't stalk intimidate or harass.... So if you call his mum (for example) just to tell her that he has been a naughty boy... Well guess what, that is stalking, it is intimidation and it is harassment.... Now you're in this strife because you sent some nasty text messages and sent to many of them.... Continuing to contact his extended family is exactly the same thing. It will be a breach and it could end in jail time..

Oh and I'm pretty sure it will say that you can't contact anyone who he has a domestic relationship with... That would include his extended family and HER extended family.
 

sammy01

Well-Known Member
27 September 2015
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ok so you call his parents / siblings? on a phone... that is electronic.... IF he feels harassed by it and goes to the cops.. Then you have met the criteria of breaching the order... Electronic - yup.... he feels harassed?

So what do you want to achieve by contacting his family? I can only think of one reason... To bad mouth him... That is harassment.

Can you seriously give me a good reason to contact his family other than to bad mouth him??? Oh and these 'facts' your facts could easily be considered slander and even IF the facts can be proven WHO CARES other than you?

get on with living... Better off without this guy by the sounds of things
 

Sarah1983

Active Member
21 January 2018
11
0
31
'Facts'? I don't know if you have ever been involved in a five year emotionally abusive relationship but the toll it has taken on me is extreme. He has lied about me to everyone in his life and to clear my name I would like the chance to defend myself. I have spent years protecting him and for him to go to these lengths to avoid his new girlfriend knowing the truth has blown my mind.
 

sammy01

Well-Known Member
27 September 2015
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720
2,894
yep I was in a relationship, I was married too. had 3 kids.... I wasn't allowed to see my kids because of the lies, wasn't allowed to go to my own home...

You came here looking for advice... Dont take it. I don't care. But I reckon you're putting yourself in a position where jail is a possibility... And yes that is a fact... It might be a fact that he was shagging her while with you. It might be a fact that you were shagging him while he was with her... But none of that matters in law NONE OF IT.... What does matter is you have a restraining order on you and if you want to risk it... Go for it. BUT you are risking jail time......
 
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