NSW Can Father Make Me Go to Mediation?

[Fluffy]

He's very aggressive when he talks to me. Tonight, he threatened me with what he's going to do to take her off me. Force me to quit my job this was straight after a visit. This is what I'm exposed to every time he comes to see her.

 

[AllForHer]

Yes, but if the Court views it in the context of his frustrations over being blockaded from his child's life, an AVO is going to look like another attempt to stop him from seeing the child, which won't go in your favour. This is particularly true of the timing - after years of little inclusion, no AVOs and no breaches of AVOs, he finally starts proceedings to see his child and now all of a sudden, you're saying he's violent and you need an AVO? Come on, now. If you felt he genuinely posed a risk to the child's safety, it would have been evident in your very first post. What it looks like instead is just another attempt to violate your child's legal right to enjoy a meaningful relationship with her father.

I really strongly encourage you to consider the way in which your actions can be perceived by the Court, because realistically, a parent's decision to erect obstacles between a child and the other parent is quite often the reason the Court does reverse residency arrangements, after all. If you're found to be frustrating the father's attempts to be a part of his child's life, you really do run the risk of losing custody all together.

You really need to ensure you're not doing anything to inflame the situation. Take the high road, be reasonable and assertive, and don't retain a list of terms and conditions that he must meet before you'll facilitate the child's time with him. You would probably also benefit from a post-separation parenting course to help you make sense of what your child needs from you when it comes to her relationship with her father.

I'm concerned that you're looking for reasons and ways to cut the father out of the child's life for good, which is going to do more harm than good to your case. Please, please listen to me when I tell you that you need to put your personal feelings toward the father aside and start considering your child's rights to have a relationship with both of the people who created her.

 

[Fluffy]

Yes, but if the Court views it in the context of his frustrations over being blockaded from his child's life, an AVO is going to look like another attempt to stop him from seeing the child, which won't go in your favour. This is particularly true of the timing - after years of little inclusion, no AVOs and no breaches of AVOs, he finally starts proceedings to see his child and now all of a sudden, you're saying he's violent and you need an AVO? Come on, now. If you felt he genuinely posed a risk to the child's safety, it would have been evident in your very first post. What it looks like instead is just another attempt to violate your child's legal right to enjoy a meaningful relationship with her father.

I really strongly encourage you to consider the way in which your actions can be perceived by the Court, because realistically, a parent's decision to erect obstacles between a child and the other parent is quite often the reason the Court does reverse residency arrangements, after all. If you're found to be frustrating the father's attempts to be a part of his child's life, you really do run the risk of losing custody all together.

You really need to ensure you're not doing anything to inflame the situation. Take the high road, be reasonable and assertive, and don't retain a list of terms and conditions that he must meet before you'll facilitate the child's time with him. You would probably also benefit from a post-separation parenting course to help you make sense of what your child needs from you when it comes to her relationship with her father.

I'm concerned that you're looking for reasons and ways to cut the father out of the child's life for good, which is going to do more harm than good to your case. Please, please listen to me when I tell you that you need to put your personal feelings toward the father aside and start considering your child's rights to have a relationship with both of the people who created her.

I will....

You slapped me silly with the truth.

Thank you I will listen now.