Domestic Violence from Child's Father - Relocation Interstate?

[Karen Jones]

I currently reside in NSW, with my 2 year old son. My sons biological father met him for the first time 4 months ago and has begun having contact with him a few times a week. I now supervise this as he reacted violently with my son the first time he stayed the night at his house. (Dragged my son into his bedroom and swore at him.) The biological father currently lives in the same town as me.

Since the father has been involved he has been verbally abusive to both my child and myself, he also used drugs regularly and drinks heavily most nights, which makes him even more aggressive. I am currently at the point now where i cannot rely on him or confide in him at all, and actually somewhat fear him.

My family all reside in Victoria (including my mother, of whom my son is extremely close with). I am hoping to relocate to Victoria to live with my mother and grandmother, who have offered to help support me both financially and emotionally (custody of children). I have spoken to the biological father of my child about intending to do this of which he yet again reacted violently, throwing objects around the house and yelling at me in front of our son.

Every time I have mentioned the idea since he has become incredibly angry and taken off with my son (returning him 8+ hours later). I am concerned that i will be forced to stay here in NSW where I have no support whatsoever, i am too afraid to continue requesting his approval but I cannot stay here when I am not coping like this with this domestic violence.

What are my options at this point?

Thanks in advance.

 

[Sarah J]

Hi Karen,

I understand this is an extremely difficult position to be in, for both your son and yourself.

Can you relocate your son?

If you wish to relocate with your son, it is best to reach an agreement with the biological father. If you cannot reach an agreement yourselves, you can apply to the court for a relocation order. The court may not grant the order if it significantly limits the time your son will spend with his biological father unless the court believes spending time with his father is not in the child's best interests. Further, the court will consider your son's broader network of friends and support and whether relocation is in the best interests of the child in the end: see "Family Court - Relocation and Travel". Relocation to get away from a parent is an extreme measure and there are many other options to try first.

Can I prevent/restrict the biological father's access to my son?

If you are afraid that the biological father may continue to abuse your son and yourself, you should apply to court for a parenting order and simultaneously, file a notice of child abuse, family violence or risk of family violence (form here). The court will contact a welfare authority to investigate the allegations and fasten the process for a parenting order: see "Family Court - Child Abuse Allegations".