I thought I was reading my own post then!Thought I would respond as our situation is a little different but still coronavirus related. Mother of child (I am step mother) has informed father today that she is keeping child home from school for the week and would like us to do the same next week (50/50 care), stating the principle of the school has recommended it. Letter has been released since from principle stating she has cancelled assembly's and excursions and we should be encouraging children to wash hands etc - nothing about keeping children home. As child is currently missing out on a lot of schooling in mother's care we do not intend to keep child home unless it is recommended by principal or QLD government. We are worried mother isn't going to be happy with this and may cause issues for father, however, we are hoping that as we have final orders that mother will not be silly enough to withhold child (as she has done many times before court).
or.... My first set of orders had a stipulation that went something like this.
In the event that one parent was unable to supervise the kids then that parent must give the other parent the first right to refuse that time. If one parent cant supervise the kids, then the first preference should be they be with the other parent.
Now let me save you $10's of thousands of dollars. See you're all over about 5 threads here. All about what a b***h the mum is... Sounds like she is... But it isn't your job to prove it... Your job is to prove that you and her can get along OR at least you are willing to get along for the sake of the kid. If you make your case about proving mum is a b***h, you'll succeed - but being a b***h insn't a crime. So what have you actually achieved?
There is a lot more than just degeneration issues. It would take pages to explain The detriments of the girls going to stay home with her more than necessary. I could list the drug issues, past sex worker (unknown if still is) and go on and on and I am sure you would see how this solution is definitely not a reasonable one for us. In an ideal world, she would co-parent effectively and a decision could be made together between my partner and his ex (like my ex and I have!) but as a diagnosed narcissist and schizophrenic, the challenges that we are faced with weekly are incomprehensible. However, I guess my point is that not everyone agrees that the children should be taken out of school and homed school. This is an individual preference and If it was an order by the government, and schools were locked down (which in SA they aren’t and oshc is readily available) then of course this wouldn’t be an issue.I've seen worse custody/separation battles than a mum who offers to look after the kids while you're at work.
She has raised a concern for safety issue for the child that can extend to a home environment if not managed properly.
She has given you a perfectly reasonable solution.
I get that you have denigrigation concerns in her care, but honestly, if you guys can be seen to work together and cooperate through this, it is going to work out a lot better for you when you go to court.
I can't express this strongly enough. Suck it up and work together for this, it will look very good for you if you do.
If you can't get your head around letting her look after the child during the 9-5 hours for just this period of time, then quit work or take leave or whatever you need to do to free yourself up.
But don't get into a battle over this. She has provided a solution, you can either take it, or provide another one that both parties can agree on.
She appears to agree or have no choice in you having the child in your care ordinarily this week, so whilst you are technically allowed to do whatever you like, trust me, it's not worth the fall out.
These are testing times and the ones who pass the test are going to be rewarded at the end when the courts see no conflict and cooperation.
I completely get what you are saying.Look, I totally agree with you in that sense and by the sounds of it, I wouldn't want my kids with her either... but the risk here is that you end up with her withholding them and you're in a whole new world of hurt that is going to cost you dearly... emotionally and financially.
Honestly, if I were you, I would work out a way to stay at home with the kids and provide the care yourself.
I get it and you are right, he does have equal say, but now is not the time to get yourself into a even more serious situation.
Pick your battles and whilst this ordinarily might be considered a big one, it takes a back seat to the likely alternative which is that she will withhold child and start something way bigger.