TAS Concerned wife, what next

Discussion in 'Family Law Forum' started by Ashra, 26 November 2018.

  1. Ashra

    Ashra Member

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    I am extremely concerned. My husband cheated on me quite some time back. He had a child to his affair, I forgave him on the conditions he's not to see the child. He agreed and hasn't seen the child, however, the lady has gone for child support.

    How will this affect myself and my husband financially? I don't believe it's fair as we don't ever want to see the child, and my husband and myself have a joint bank account. How will he get out of this and how much do they take and can child support take assets such as businesses and cars, etc?

    I dislike this system.
     
  2. sammy01

    sammy01 Well-Known Member

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    With respect - you dislike a system you don't fully understand.

    CSA will collect a % of hubby's income. How much? depends on how much he earns and how much she earns. The easiest way to find out how much? Call CSA 131272. Ask them to do the figures based on a hypothetical. So I'll give you some guidance at worst case scenario...

    Tell CSA what your hubby earned last year. - Gross income. Tell them that there is 1 child and the mother earns $20k. They should be able to work it out from there. BTW if you and hubby have kids that should reduce the amount he has to pay.

    Stuff like the amount of $ in a joint account or any shared assets is pretty much irrelevant unless he tries to scam the system and gets caught.

    Is hubby on the birth certificate?
     
  3. Ashra

    Ashra Member

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    Yes he is cause of her
     
  4. Rod

    Rod Well-Known Member
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    A lot of people on both sides of the CSA fence dislike child support.

    And you have put your interests ahead of a child who is completely innocent. You are not just punishing your husband, but also a child who deserves the right to know their father. Suggest you put aside your anger and need for revenge against your husband and think of the child. There's already enough misery in families without contributing to another. Either forgive your husband, or kick him out, but don't punish the innocent child.
     
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  5. Scruff

    Scruff Well-Known Member

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    Probably the most selfish thing that I've ever heard in my life - and something that you had absolutely no right to do. You can actually be sued for doing that.
    And that is exactly the reason why.
    No, he's on the birth certificate because he is the child's father.
    You're assuming that he isn't just saying that because of the conditions that you placed on your own marriage.

    I think you need to grow up and face reality. You've created a fantasy world for yourself and I wouldn't be at all surprised if it comes back to bite you in a big way in the future.

    The first thing you and your husband should be doing is making sure that he does see the child.
     
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    GlassHalfFull likes this.
  6. GlassHalfFull

    GlassHalfFull Well-Known Member

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    Have to agree with above... The poor child deserves to have a father present in his/her life. I do understand that it might inflame old wounds, but you have to grow up and accept what has happened.

    What you choose to do about it with regards to your husband is, of course, your own prerogative but if you can forgive him, the child should have nothing to do with it in my opinion. I would have thought that him showing that he can take responsibility for his mistakes/actions by being a good and decent father to the child should impress you more than his ability to pretend it never happened. I guess not...
     
  7. Tim W

    Tim W Lawyer
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    She is 100% entitled to do that.
    Your husband will be required to pay child support for this child.
    You however, are not personally liable in any respect.
    With all due courtesy, your opinion doesn't matter.
    You mean you don't want to ever see the child.
    He might, but, as a condition of staying with him you're not letting him.
    Fair warning - human beings being what they are, don't be surprised if he goes on to see the child behind your back.
    In any event, he still has an obligation to pay child support even if he never meets or sees the child, ever.
    A parent cannot simply disclaim financial responsibility for their child.
    That's pretty much the whole point of the child support regime.
    Might be a good time to set up your own.
    He won't.
    That figure is calculated for each individual case, based on assets and income of the parents.
    There's a lot has to happen before that happens.
    The system ensures that more parents get paid than don't.
    It's a long, long way from perfect, but it's better than any alternative.
     
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