Recovery Order?

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JadeGoldCoast

Well-Known Member
7 October 2017
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Hi Sammy, thanks for pointing that out to us. Our lawyer has been using the term 'sole custody' so we may need to clarify this before an application is drawn up. He said based on the mother's current behaviour we should be requesting a psych assessment and thinks there's quite a concern for the child's wellbeing in her care. He even mentioned supervised time with the mother, but this seems pretty drastic and unrealistic? The child hasn't attended school in 2.5 weeks now, we are in contact with the child's special needs teacher as she is hoping to check in on him for us, but obviously cannot while he isn't attending school - so we are pretty concerned that he's being isolated and being fed rubbish about us.
 

sammy01

Well-Known Member
27 September 2015
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ok my concerns.... Yep the term 'sole custody' isn't really used, but folk sometimes use it because it is common people language. So I agree with his advice but it is the expensive road. Look, you guys have been posting here for a bloody long time but I don't recall you expressing concerns for the child's wellbeing with mum? Sure not mum of the year but not a meth addict either?

So I can see solicitor's thinking, but the solicitor doesn't live in the world of living from pay day to pay day and just getting primary care status would probably be a good win rather than all of he bs with supervised visits and all that.
 

GlassHalfFull

Well-Known Member
28 August 2018
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Primary care is the preferred term I think. It can be anything from sole care to 51% care. Shared care is usually reserved for when it's literally 50/50, week about or similar.

As for supervised time, I've been through it (while not needing it at all) and it's horrible. You second guess your own abilities as a parent when you're being judged and reported on by people whose job it is (unofficially) is to find fault in your parenting. So unless you want to play hard ball with the mother, I wouldn't recommend it. Most people who aren't vindictive a-holes can see how traumatic it is for children to think their parent needs to be supervised (not to mention escalating the situation unnecessarily).

Having said that though, you need to do what's best for your relationship with the child and that may be primary care arrangements. Selfish, manipulative parents shouldn't be allowed to get away with it but ultimately I think the courts are often hamstrung by the fact that punishing the parent also inadvertently punishes the child, which creates a system where it's difficult to create incentives for parents to change their behaviour.
 

JadeGoldCoast

Well-Known Member
7 October 2017
185
4
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Thanks for your advice, we agree supervised time sounds like a horrible experience for everyone. We have advised our lawyer we would like to go for 11 days per fortnight care and 50% of holidays.

In regards to the new court application, am I right in presuming it will be as long and drawn out as the first application? I think it was 18 months - 2 years last time.

Does anyone know if we likely to be given 50% contact (current orders) at the first hearing? Lord knows what rubbish the mother is going to try and fabricate between now and then. As the mother is saying the child is scared of my partner and doesn't want to spend time with him and has be dragged kicking and screaming into our care we have requested a letter from the child's school and afterschool care as this is completely untrue (changeover occurs at school). The school have refused stating they legally cannot get involved, but thankfully the OSHC coordinator has written a really lovely letter outlining her opinion that the child and father have a loving happy relationship.
 

GlassHalfFull

Well-Known Member
28 August 2018
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I guess every court case is different, and will depend on how things play out and what each party demands or is willing to concede to bring the matter to a close. Mine has been ongoing for nearly 3 years and is approaching a trial in the next few months if we don't reach an agreement. I would hope that if I did end up back in court down the track (likely, given even if we do agree on final orders, they will only be relevant for a couple of years before I would want to revisit the orders to reconsider a regime that would build towards 50/50 time.

As things stand, because of the young ages of my children, I'm limited in what I can ask the court to grant at the moment, but as they get older, I'll be pursuing graduated time to 50/50. No idea how easy that process will be. That will largely depend on the mother!
 

Rod

Lawyer
LawConnect (LawTap) Verified
27 May 2014
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Consider taking out an IVO as well.

Sounds like abuse of a child.
 

JadeGoldCoast

Well-Known Member
7 October 2017
185
4
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Hi Rod, I think an IVO is our equivalent of a DVO? I just don't know how we can prove anything. We have requested a welfare check on the child as this is the 5th week he hasn't gone to school and we haven't had contact - but they're not interested. We contacted child safety to note our concerns but it doesn't sound promising.

We finally received our draft affidavit and application this afternoon so at least were moving in the right direction.
 

Rod

Lawyer
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27 May 2014
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5 weeks and no school is likely grounds enough. Then you have alienation from you. Ask your lawyer to prepare and submit a DVO.
 

JadeGoldCoast

Well-Known Member
7 October 2017
185
4
394
Thanks Rod. Mother has now informed us she is home schooling the child and he is completing set homework from the school. Not happy about it and hoping a judge can order the child to return to school.

We have a date set for 2nd August which isn't too bad, also feels like forever. I wasn't aware attendence is now performed over a phone call. The lawyer we used for the application/affidavit writing has advised that we are likely to have the same judge for each court date, which is also different to our last application in court.
 

sammy01

Well-Known Member
27 September 2015
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yeah, She isn't home schooling? I'm a teacher... Homeschooling isn't just a matter of taking the kid outa school. The state dept of education has requirements and this chick ain't even close to being able to meet those requirements