Recovery Order?

Australia's #1 for Law
Join 150,000 Australians every month. Ask a question, respond to a question and better understand the law today!
FREE - Join Now

JadeGoldCoast

Well-Known Member
7 October 2017
132
3
389
Hi Sammy, thanks for pointing that out to us. Our lawyer has been using the term 'sole custody' so we may need to clarify this before an application is drawn up. He said based on the mother's current behaviour we should be requesting a psych assessment and thinks there's quite a concern for the child's wellbeing in her care. He even mentioned supervised time with the mother, but this seems pretty drastic and unrealistic? The child hasn't attended school in 2.5 weeks now, we are in contact with the child's special needs teacher as she is hoping to check in on him for us, but obviously cannot while he isn't attending school - so we are pretty concerned that he's being isolated and being fed rubbish about us.
 

sammy01

Well-Known Member
27 September 2015
4,703
673
2,894
ok my concerns.... Yep the term 'sole custody' isn't really used, but folk sometimes use it because it is common people language. So I agree with his advice but it is the expensive road. Look, you guys have been posting here for a bloody long time but I don't recall you expressing concerns for the child's wellbeing with mum? Sure not mum of the year but not a meth addict either?

So I can see solicitor's thinking, but the solicitor doesn't live in the world of living from pay day to pay day and just getting primary care status would probably be a good win rather than all of he bs with supervised visits and all that.
 

GlassHalfFull

Well-Known Member
28 August 2018
440
38
714
Primary care is the preferred term I think. It can be anything from sole care to 51% care. Shared care is usually reserved for when it's literally 50/50, week about or similar.

As for supervised time, I've been through it (while not needing it at all) and it's horrible. You second guess your own abilities as a parent when you're being judged and reported on by people whose job it is (unofficially) is to find fault in your parenting. So unless you want to play hard ball with the mother, I wouldn't recommend it. Most people who aren't vindictive a-holes can see how traumatic it is for children to think their parent needs to be supervised (not to mention escalating the situation unnecessarily).

Having said that though, you need to do what's best for your relationship with the child and that may be primary care arrangements. Selfish, manipulative parents shouldn't be allowed to get away with it but ultimately I think the courts are often hamstrung by the fact that punishing the parent also inadvertently punishes the child, which creates a system where it's difficult to create incentives for parents to change their behaviour.