VIC likley outcome seeking parenting orders with ivo on me

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3 November 2017
Hey Guys great forum good to know im not the only one.. wondering if anyone has an opinion on this:

Dated my ex for 12 years, 2 years separation in the middle. We had a serious argument, no violence though and break up. Three weeks later she calls to say i'm pregnant. She refuses pre natal paternity test. Had to wait 10 months post natal. Daughter is born 7/2016. 1 month prior to the birth ex relocates unilaterally to another city 150km away. She is hassling me for a passport wants to go to England to see family. Soon as I refuse the overseas travel in 11/2016 the cops ring to invite me to be served with IVO. She alleges 1 historical act of violence and a various allegations of psychological distress. Lawyer says just consent without admission which I do, and asks me for $5,000 to get parenting orders, which I don't mainly due to expense . IVO only says do not commit violence for 12 months. Contact with my daughter etc is allowed. Ex has allowed some access to my daughter but far less than I want. Im still refusing the passport as im concerned she may not return. Im paying privately agreed CS well in excess of CSA assessment as well as other forms of support. My assessment is very low but due private arrangement CSA don't bother hassling me. 9/2017 (2 months before expiry of the IVO) she applies to vary the order to no contact alleging I'm 'coercive'. Lawyer says get parenting orders asap Feb 2018 is the soonest. Don't bother fighting the AVO. However im indignant at the false allegations so I do not consent. First mention male magistrate says to the ex no we only vary orders if there is clear safety or property damage issue which there is not here. Ex has a credibility issue because she tells so many lies... Second mention i still wont consent ask her to withdraw it but she proceeds. Very stern female magistrate immediately issues interim no contact order and instructs the ex to file further particulars to proceed. Third mention she files particulars series of emails all innocuous no threats or abuse but not always tactful. I consent to another 12 months no contact as I don't want to pay to fight this and she already has interim order anyway and i'm going for parenting orders. So I can save my cash for the parenting orders.

So now paid my money we are off to get parenting orders in 3 months. Daughter now 16 months old. By Feb 2018 it will be 5 months no contact with my daughter. Im asking the solicitor to get me day visits fortnightly not restricted to 2 hours as current until age 3 then alternate weekends til age 5 then 50:50 custody. Im asking for access visits to alternate between my city and hers and to prevent her from moving any further from my city. Quite concerned about the impact of the IVO on the parenting orders process.

Am I asking too much here? Anyone care to guess how much access I am likely to get in the fed circuit court parenting orders given the false IVO? Am also concerned and distressed at the 5 months no contact with my daughter. Is there any way around this given the no contact orders? Is there anything else I should be asking my solicitor for?


Well-Known Member
27 September 2015
Avo isn't all that bad in family law... your real problem is the age of the children and Mum's hostility...


Well-Known Member
23 July 2014
Yeah, don't worry about the IVO, it won't matter much without more evidence.

You won't get 50/50 living 150km apart though. That's maybe an every other weekend deal, and it's probably reasonable to expect at least one overnight a fortnight to start now, then increase to two and three in future years.

My kid started sleeping over with her grandparents every couple of weeks when she was about six months old and she is doing just fine.