Hi
I have 6 children, 4 who are fathered by my ex partner (ended 6 years ago).
Their ages are 14, 13, 11 and 10. The children no longer want to see their dad very often. I have to push them to go every school holidays and on our parenting plan (not lodged) he was to have them for half the holidays. They are generally begging me to get them after 4 or 5 days, which I do. We live 4 hours away.
I have had to painfully watch them come to the realisation that he is not a 'normal' dad. The youngest (10) has gradually reached this realisation earlier in the year. I can't even get them to ring him. He is an alcoholic who becomes either morose or aggressive and abusive (domestic violence). When the children see him, he sleeps all day or sits out the back and smokes or gets so intoxicated that he wets himself. He takes them nowhere. And he has no interest in getting a job so that he can help with their interests, or buy them birthday/Xmas presents. He tells the children that the world owes him, etc, so hasn't worked in 20 years. They have told me that they are so embarrassed by him.
At this age, do I force them to go? I am in a constant panic mode when they're with him for their safety and the impact he has on their emotional growth.
We all want to relocate to NZ where we have aunts, uncles, grandparents and cousins who want a part in teaching, guiding and loving my children. They are severely lacking in that area here, they rarely see their other family as they are busy/uninterested.
How old do they have to be for a judge to listen to what they want? By moving, we can offer them so much more emotionally, indeed it's the ONLY reason I want to go.
By the way, I'm not being vindictive in anyway, I truly only want the best for my children. And I am happy to send them over in school holidays (as long as their grandparents are there so they are safe), I have never stopped him from seeing his children ever, and have never spoken of him in a derogatory manner in front of them.
Any family law advice gratefully appreciated.
I have 6 children, 4 who are fathered by my ex partner (ended 6 years ago).
Their ages are 14, 13, 11 and 10. The children no longer want to see their dad very often. I have to push them to go every school holidays and on our parenting plan (not lodged) he was to have them for half the holidays. They are generally begging me to get them after 4 or 5 days, which I do. We live 4 hours away.
I have had to painfully watch them come to the realisation that he is not a 'normal' dad. The youngest (10) has gradually reached this realisation earlier in the year. I can't even get them to ring him. He is an alcoholic who becomes either morose or aggressive and abusive (domestic violence). When the children see him, he sleeps all day or sits out the back and smokes or gets so intoxicated that he wets himself. He takes them nowhere. And he has no interest in getting a job so that he can help with their interests, or buy them birthday/Xmas presents. He tells the children that the world owes him, etc, so hasn't worked in 20 years. They have told me that they are so embarrassed by him.
At this age, do I force them to go? I am in a constant panic mode when they're with him for their safety and the impact he has on their emotional growth.
We all want to relocate to NZ where we have aunts, uncles, grandparents and cousins who want a part in teaching, guiding and loving my children. They are severely lacking in that area here, they rarely see their other family as they are busy/uninterested.
How old do they have to be for a judge to listen to what they want? By moving, we can offer them so much more emotionally, indeed it's the ONLY reason I want to go.
By the way, I'm not being vindictive in anyway, I truly only want the best for my children. And I am happy to send them over in school holidays (as long as their grandparents are there so they are safe), I have never stopped him from seeing his children ever, and have never spoken of him in a derogatory manner in front of them.
Any family law advice gratefully appreciated.