NSW What to Expect During Mediation?

[Tee609]

Hello.

Can someone tell me what to expect in a joint mediation session for a parenting plan? I've just been given the date and timeframe and it's a 2-hour time slot. I know we will talk about who sees the children when and I've been told special occasion days will be spoken about, but what else?

I've drafted what I'd like to achieve out of mediation and it's like 10 minutes tops it would take me to say all of that and I don't think he'd disagree on any of it? So I'm just at a loss as to what would happen for the next hour and 45 mins?

Is there some kind of checklist the mediator goes through to say who gets them on this day who gets them school holidays even though they are too young for school? I just hate being unprepared and not knowing what to expect on my private session. The mediator was nice but said that they will explain in the joint session and I feel like that's silly cause I'm unprepared for what they may ask.

I wasn't asked anything about what I'd like to achieve from the joint session. He more or less had a list of 15 questions that he asked and it was mainly about my personal relationship with the ex, why the relationship split, had either of us moved on, did I feel my ex was happy and why? Was I happy and why?

He asked how willing I am to come to an agreement. He asked about my ex's partner and her character. He asked if I believed my ex was willing to come to a civil agreement. Is he verbally abusive, etc., and asked who my kids were, how old and that was it.

 

[sammy01]

So assuming the ex agrees with everything, then you could be out of there reasonably quickly but what if the ex has a different perspective... So what if ex wants 50/50 care but you only want him to see the kids for 3 nights a fortnight?

Look there isn't anything terribly tricky about mediation. They are not there to take sides. They are just there to facilitate getting an agreement. Now you seem pretty confident that he is just going to agree with your suggestions... That makes me wonder why on earth do you need to do mediation at all????

 

[AllForHer]

Things to include:

- Parental responsibility
- Who the child lives with
- What regular time the child spends with the other parent
- What time the child will spend with each parent for special occasions (usually just your birthday, your ex's birthday, the child's birthday, Christmas, Easter, Father's Day and Mother's Day)
- What holiday time the child will spend with each parent (usually something like no more than 10 days with the parent taking holidays to provide at least 1 month of notice to the other parent until the child starts school, then half of gazetted school holidays when the child does start school)
- A provision for phone calls to the other parent when they're not spending time with them
- A provision for changeovers and where they will take place
- A provision for how you and your ex will communicate with each other

Everything else is usually considered optional, like informing each other of travel itineraries, doctor appointments, etc.

The less conflict there is between the parents, the less detailed the parenting plan needs to be.