NT When to Seek Legal Advice for Financial and Property Settlement?

[inlimbo1980]

Hi,

Most of what I post in this message I hope is relevant to Family Law. Basically what I’m after is thoughts from anyone in a similar situation as my own.

I separated from my wife of 15 years, in November 2017. We have 2 children, 11 and 13. Jointly, we own 3 properties, one of which I am currently residing in. These properties are currently still being paid off by both my wife and I.

My wife is in a rented unit that is currently paid for out of our joint bank account. We continue to pool our incomes into our joint bank account. We both have full unrestricted access to this account. My wife has credit cards with 2 other providers, that I don’t have access to. We both currently work for Northern Territory Government. I previously worked in Defence, my wife also works part time in secondary employment. Therefore we both have two separate superannuation funds.

We have not discussed splitting of finances, financial or property settlement, at all, at this stage.

It is now 3 months since our official separation and I have been informed that I should start to seek legal advice and start the process of financial and property settlements as it will be more complicated as time goes on.

There has been discussion of reconciliation, however, it is myself that has a significant interest in that.

Any practical help would be gratefully appreciated.

 

[Tim W]

t is now 3 months since our official separation and I have been informed that I should start to seek legal advice and start the process of financial and property settlements as it will be more complicated as time goes on.

I am not a Family Law guy, so factor that in as you read,
but I'll say this - getting advice early is better then getting advice late.

Take yourself, by yourself, to a lawyer of your own choosing,
who works in the field of Family Law.
Being ex-defence, you may find it helpful to think about whether or not
you want your lawyer to be a full-time civilian (ie not also a choc).

Also, take yourself to a (civilian) psychologist, and have them assess you.
Thing is, you might be crook and not know it.
And that might be Part Of What's Happening.
Even if you're fine, it's better to know.

Also, and this is very important - do not take any notice of
what people in the defence universe tell you about Family Law
and how it works.
Every case, like every family, is different, and one person's experience
is rarely fully comparable to that of anyone else.

 

[Couchsurfing]

Assess how keen she is to settle things via mediation. If she shows little or no interest, apply to the court. Don't waste your time waiting around. Thing won't solve itself just by waiting.

 

[sammy01]

Learn lots. Places lke this can save you some money by answering questions for free. So let's start.

There is a process called mediation. There are some organisations that can help, Relationships Australia is one. They are gov't funded so are very cheap to use. Mediation is an attempt to come to an agreement about stuff like child access and assets. Nice easy way of moving forward. But unlikely to work...

So then you can get a solicitor to write to her and she can do the same. You might come to an agreement that way. But it depends on how realistic each person is... So in my case, my ex wanted 105% of assets - Yup...

So lots of money got wasted until she finally accepted that 105% wasn't gonna happen. Eventually we came up with an agreement, but it took some coercion. When I stopped paying the mortgage on the house she was living in, she started playing a little more nicely.

If solicitors can't sort it and mediation has failed, then it is off to court. You can self-represent. But you're best bet is to come to an agreement.

So I also strongly recommend trying to get an agreement about child access first. Depending on what you're wanting, that should be priority. Do you want 50/50 care?

By getting the child access sorted you are trying to ensure money doesn't get used as leverage for kids... Short version - you don't want her saying you can only have the kids if you give in to her financial demands...

So try and get child access sorted first. What sort of access are you having atm?