VIC Intervention order and length of time

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GlassHalfFull

Well-Known Member
28 August 2018
544
51
2,289
Yes, that's right, no physical evidence, no witnesses, no bruises, no medical report, no photos of injuries. Just her her word against mine. But from what I understand, the magistrate doesn't NEED proof, just a believable story, on the balance of probabilities, etc?

My concern about contesting it is mainly that it seems the bar is set so low for 'domestic violence' that even things that most couples do from time to time like yelling at each other in an argument in which the kids were witness could be considered violent and if her story sounded persuasive, the magistrate could still end up with a finding of guilt against me. I've spoken to the duty lawyers during my initial hearings to try to gauge their opinion and they agree her case is pretty weak, but they still won't say that I have a good shot of winning. So far they've sat on the fence about it and told me I'm best off at least taking it to a directions hearing and get 'further and better particulars' to get more details of what she is alleging.

Also, when we separated and I moved out, I took some a few thousand dollars from our joint account as I had previously been the primary carer of my daughter (a stay at home dad) and had no savings on my own and given we had joint savings, I considered it my money as much as hers. Within a few days of doing this, I received notification of the intervention order, which among the many accusations, included that I had 'committed economic violence' against her by 'emptying the joint bank account' and 'demanding that she also give me money from her personal account' (which I never did, and since we were communicating by text message the entire time, I have proof of that). Never mind that SHE had an income and was receiving it directly into her personal account so it's not like I was holding her hostage financially, which is what I would normally have thought economic violence might be.

So there are a few extra things in there that while I think I have a strong case on, I really don't know how a magistrate is going to look at it. If I had taken out a counter intervention order against her, I'd probably have a stronger case that she had committed violence (she has even admitted in her family court affidavit that she hit me, although she claimed it was in self defence), according to the many and varied definitions, against me, but I don't really see how it would help the situation to do so because I'm trying to defuse the situation and try to have a normal relationship with my kids (and hopefully eventually my ex, although that remains to be seen). And even if I try to argue all this in my contested hearing, I suspect the magistrate is going to say "That's all well and good and it seems you have a good case that your ex was violent, but this order I'm dealing with today is about whether YOU have committed violence, not her".

Next intervention order hearing is late March. And a family court hearing early March.

Does seem tempting to self-represent, I'll see how it plays out.
 

Moonpie

Member
13 January 2019
4
0
1
Yes, that's right, no physical evidence, no witnesses, no bruises, no medical report, no photos of injuries. Just her her word against mine. But from what I understand, the magistrate doesn't NEED proof, just a believable story, on the balance of probabilities, etc?

My concern about contesting it is mainly that it seems the bar is set so low for 'domestic violence' that even things that most couples do from time to time like yelling at each other in an argument in which the kids were witness could be considered violent and if her story sounded persuasive, the magistrate could still end up with a finding of guilt against me. I've spoken to the duty lawyers during my initial hearings to try to gauge their opinion and they agree her case is pretty weak, but they still won't say that I have a good shot of winning. So far they've sat on the fence about it and told me I'm best off at least taking it to a directions hearing and get 'further and better particulars' to get more details of what she is alleging.

Also, when we separated and I moved out, I took some a few thousand dollars from our joint account as I had previously been the primary carer of my daughter (a stay at home dad) and had no savings on my own and given we had joint savings, I considered it my money as much as hers. Within a few days of doing this, I received notification of the intervention order, which among the many accusations, included that I had 'committed economic violence' against her by 'emptying the joint bank account' and 'demanding that she also give me money from her personal account' (which I never did, and since we were communicating by text message the entire time, I have proof of that). Never mind that SHE had an income and was receiving it directly into her personal account so it's not like I was holding her hostage financially, which is what I would normally have thought economic violence might be.

So there are a few extra things in there that while I think I have a strong case on, I really don't know how a magistrate is going to look at it. If I had taken out a counter intervention order against her, I'd probably have a stronger case that she had committed violence (she has even admitted in her family court affidavit that she hit me, although she claimed it was in self defence), according to the many and varied definitions, against me, but I don't really see how it would help the situation to do so because I'm trying to defuse the situation and try to have a normal relationship with my kids (and hopefully eventually my ex, although that remains to be seen). And even if I try to argue all this in my contested hearing, I suspect the magistrate is going to say "That's all well and good and it seems you have a good case that your ex was violent, but this order I'm dealing with today is about whether YOU have committed violence, not her".

Next intervention order hearing is late March. And a family court hearing early March.

Does seem tempting to self-represent, I'll see how it plays out.

I am in same boat right now..it's very very rocky emotionally..I am working from home,primary carer for my 3 year son,invested 200k in her business,business disputes,I discussed separation with her and my son arrangements,she got wind of it and one day in Dec 2018,without any warning she left with my son to dv shelter,then first she sent property settlement letter without my son arrangements,I moved to federal court with initiation application for co-parenting,once received she did temporary protection order for her and include my son. I was in shocked for one week and didn't got her allegations till 7th Jan due to court Christmas holidays, her lawyer sent threatened letters to break me more since I am now have to handling my business as well as her business as well with acute extremely high emotional pain alienated from my son whose I was taking care for last 2 years Day & night. After join this forum, I learnt so many guys on same boat,different stories but same pain. What I can't understand that feminist always put statistics about domestic violence but have they diwcussed about male suicide rate. When being father or husband, you are working 12-15 hours daily to comfort Ur family,but when wife could not take struggle of life as bondage of love but for her convienced,it fall apart everything. I am taking everyday as it comes,have been in depression for last 15 months.i will fight false allegations till my last breath,not for me but I am proud father and don't want my son seeing me as abuser all life. Fortunately it's her application,not from police,she called police 2 times on different occasions on filmsy ground like I touch her mobile & hide my son passport,policed did investigation and found nothing so police knows her vindicated nature. Finally today I gathered enough courage to write my feelings. I got family court date in March and TPO 31st Jan. Her lawyer from women's legal cell sent offer for supervised contact with my son 2 hour/week,I did my intake interview since I want to see my son but it's been 10 days,she haven't call contact centre for her interview,I have been calling centre everyday if she called but not yet. I have to stop now,can't stop my tears...