ACT Separation and Debt - Is Ex-husband Slandering Me?

[Trudi]

It has come to my attention that my ex-husband has been making statements regarding his poor financial circumstances and that I am to blame. When we separated, he took out a bank loan to pay off marital debt. This loan was due to be finalised April 2018. He is now making statements that he is in financial difficulty as he took out debt at the time of our separation, but, he has refinanced the loan twice during the past five years, of his own accord.

Does this constitute slander? Do I have any recourse to stop him making these statements?

Many thanks.

 

[Rod]

It is borderline defamation.

Most people accept some level of going backwards as a result of a separation so your reputation is not likely to suffer too much.

What do you think the injury is, keeping in mind the separation may have contributed to his situation and truth is a defence to defamation?

 

[Trudi]

He choose to take on the debt as I had to maintain a household for our disabled daughter, with the encumbent expenses that entails. Nor have I ever asked him for any financial support for her medical needs.

He has continued to speak of “her debt that I am paying off” even though the debt was accumulated largely because of his using joint funds for personal use rather than household expenditures. He constantly wanted to put bills and shopping on credit as there were insufficient funds available following his spending.

I have never spoken to friends and acquaintances of this, yet he has spent the past five years telling all who will listen about how I have left him in debt. Again, the debt would have been repaid had he not or refinanced the loan twice during the repayment period.

He is very quick to remind family, friends and acquaintances of his financial status and his concept of it’s cause, isolating me while making himself the martyr to garner support.

 

[Rod]

It is hard to say whether a letter from a lawyer will make matters better or worse.

This is a situation where you need to think about whether you would pursue the matter at court. If not, it may be better to play his game and remind people it's a debt of his own making.

This is a situation where you are better placed to make a call as to what to do rather than a third party.

 

[Trudi]

It is hard to say whether a letter from a lawyer will make matters better or worse.

This is a situation where you need to think about whether you would pursue the matter at court. If not, it may be better to play his game and remind people it's a debt of his own making.

This is a situation where you are better placed to make a call as to what to do rather than a third party.

Many thanks for the advice. I will take it onboard.

 

[sammy01]

An ex saying negative things about their former partner? U'm - so what... Happens all the time.
Waste of money seeking redress through the legal system.

Family and friends quickly get bored with this sort stuff. Just ignore it...

 

[Trudi]

It’s been five years and I am continuing to be the source of his so-called financial distress. I am not seeking legal redress per say, but guidelines to right him a letter getting to man-up and shut up to family, friends and those he meets. I am told he will tell anyone he meets about the situation. It is not going away and he is sullying my name and reputation, which as a professional leaves me open the disdain of others. Whatever debt he has now is his, not marital - that would have now been repaid. I however continue to bare the medical costs of a disabled daughter, for which I have never received a penny from him, as agreed, yet I do not call him out by name to others regarding this. “So,what” just doesn’t do me any justice.