Hi all
I am happy to have found these forums as I am really in need of some help. For many years, my ex and I did not get along well. She always told me she didn't love me anymore, etc and we lived in different rooms at stages but stayed together for the sake of our two primary school aged children. I needed to travel overseas for work, found a new partner and she found out, stated she wasn't angry, etc., as we haven't been intimate in a long time but what followed was certainly the moves of a jealous ex.
In the past, I had a few issues with drugs and alcohol also. It got bad at some points. I was in a high-stress job and offset the stress like that, recently less though. I can provide clean urine now if required.
Then one morning we are in a verbal yelling match (nothing more) and she calls the cops has an AVO served on me. It was obvious this had been prepared in court the day prior by the dates and I'm kicked out of my house, can't see my children (although the cops said the way she made the order I can contact her to arrange to see children, but she won't reply to any messages).
I made my way back overseas, as I was very heated and didn't want to cause more trouble but around a month has passed now and I need to know what I'm doing with my life, below are the issues still pending:
We had enough money in a shared overdraft account to keep paying our mortgage for around 3 months, without my authority she transferred it all to her private bank account, she has been making the mortgage payments so far.
I have breached the order in an emotional haste, sent her a few polite text messages (nothing abusive non-threatening, etc) seeing the children as this is what the police explained I could do, but she does not reply? How to see my children/arrange visitation rights?
Many of our bills are joint names, who pays those now? I am still lumped with her large phone bill because it's direct debit from my account
Can I force her hand to sell the house? Or some legal arrangement to buy me out? I'm not so sure I want to be paying for a house I can't live in.
What about the property? In the house, there are some expensive TVs, computers, etc., everything I paid for basically. How to gain access to that?
I really just want this whole mess fixed, I don't want to ruin my credit rating but it's so difficult when I can't speak to her. I am not opposed to living apart but I want a reasonable amount of visitation with my children.
I am not working at the moment. I spoke with legal aid and they said I can come in and see them, do you all think this would be effective?
Thank you all for any help. I'm realising now this needs to be dealt with by way of legal system and thinking about returning home to do it, or is it better handled from abroad?
I am happy to have found these forums as I am really in need of some help. For many years, my ex and I did not get along well. She always told me she didn't love me anymore, etc and we lived in different rooms at stages but stayed together for the sake of our two primary school aged children. I needed to travel overseas for work, found a new partner and she found out, stated she wasn't angry, etc., as we haven't been intimate in a long time but what followed was certainly the moves of a jealous ex.
In the past, I had a few issues with drugs and alcohol also. It got bad at some points. I was in a high-stress job and offset the stress like that, recently less though. I can provide clean urine now if required.
Then one morning we are in a verbal yelling match (nothing more) and she calls the cops has an AVO served on me. It was obvious this had been prepared in court the day prior by the dates and I'm kicked out of my house, can't see my children (although the cops said the way she made the order I can contact her to arrange to see children, but she won't reply to any messages).
I made my way back overseas, as I was very heated and didn't want to cause more trouble but around a month has passed now and I need to know what I'm doing with my life, below are the issues still pending:
We had enough money in a shared overdraft account to keep paying our mortgage for around 3 months, without my authority she transferred it all to her private bank account, she has been making the mortgage payments so far.
I have breached the order in an emotional haste, sent her a few polite text messages (nothing abusive non-threatening, etc) seeing the children as this is what the police explained I could do, but she does not reply? How to see my children/arrange visitation rights?
Many of our bills are joint names, who pays those now? I am still lumped with her large phone bill because it's direct debit from my account
Can I force her hand to sell the house? Or some legal arrangement to buy me out? I'm not so sure I want to be paying for a house I can't live in.
What about the property? In the house, there are some expensive TVs, computers, etc., everything I paid for basically. How to gain access to that?
I really just want this whole mess fixed, I don't want to ruin my credit rating but it's so difficult when I can't speak to her. I am not opposed to living apart but I want a reasonable amount of visitation with my children.
I am not working at the moment. I spoke with legal aid and they said I can come in and see them, do you all think this would be effective?
Thank you all for any help. I'm realising now this needs to be dealt with by way of legal system and thinking about returning home to do it, or is it better handled from abroad?