Hi all,
I'm from Perth WA, been married for 24 years and need help, and here is my long story…
I've been the main financial contributor for many years, from having multiple jobs, spending almost 8 years in the mines that also included a large redundancy payout and company bonuses.
Now, back in Perth & I've been doing countless hours as the mines closed.
Wife filed for divorce and went ahead with all legalities and tried to force me to sign of the titles of properties (1 primary house the other investment with tenant), finances, etc, which at the time I refused to sign anything as I believed in trying to resolve our marriage issue as I still love her.
Due to endless arguments and screaming matches, my health deteriorated sharply and I simply couldn’t take it as it just became so unhealthy at home and decided to give her the space she demanded by moving into my mum's house (for the 3rd time over the years).
During our separation and up to now (been over 6 months) I've been trying to get her to come with me for marriage counselling and been attending all sorts of self-development, meditation, etc, to improve on myself and encouraged her to join me so we can work on each other, but has refused to co-operate and she basically shut down and doesn't want to try anymore, although I moved back home as I saw changes in the kids that I didn't like.
So I've been back here home for the last 3 months and during my return, we've been trying and have been intimate a number of times until I had to go in for surgery about 3 weeks ago...
Not long ago I found a copy of her affidavit and was gutted to read how she made me sound like an evil heartless person – ranging from (in my words) a wife and child basher and all sorts of other stories of why the kids aren't close to me. Tonight, my friend informed me, through his soon to be ex that my wife has amended the affidavit as she was going hard for a 80/20 or something similar to those figures…
She has seen a lawyer during our separation which I have not as I clinched onto hope….the hope has failed and I feel now she will serve the papers before xmas so I have no time to organize my self
I've just noticed she has received a pay rise and that she has been withdrawing money to match my income, perhaps avoiding the fact she may not be eligible for whatever she's seeking for and playing with the sums by making payments back to her work. She also cross fired me for not lodging my last financial tax statement…somethings not adding up and im blind to what she may be up to...an agenda perhaps
I was also informed that she has some agenda in wanting to sell up and is going to invest elsewhere into a larger investment property as she now either has been promoted at work or is now receiving a larger pay slip and doesn't give a s**t in losing it all as she's in a more financially better position than me.
I feel so used and gutted as I have always placed every single dollar into this family and yet I find out she's doing all this behind my back
I'm basically lost and need help from anyone who's been in a similar case and what is the best way to protect myself and not get ripped of any more than what I am about to be and ideally want a fair 50/50 or better for myself....
All accounts are in Joint:
Kids both adults and both are working (in their 20's)
Wife and I working F/T
Wife just received an inheritance
I have bhp shares
I own a Hilux 2012
She has corolla 2012
I have a large super then her
Primary house paid off
Home loan against Investment property & has Tenant
Personal loan
Furniture and general gadgets
I'm from Perth WA, been married for 24 years and need help, and here is my long story…
I've been the main financial contributor for many years, from having multiple jobs, spending almost 8 years in the mines that also included a large redundancy payout and company bonuses.
Now, back in Perth & I've been doing countless hours as the mines closed.
Wife filed for divorce and went ahead with all legalities and tried to force me to sign of the titles of properties (1 primary house the other investment with tenant), finances, etc, which at the time I refused to sign anything as I believed in trying to resolve our marriage issue as I still love her.
Due to endless arguments and screaming matches, my health deteriorated sharply and I simply couldn’t take it as it just became so unhealthy at home and decided to give her the space she demanded by moving into my mum's house (for the 3rd time over the years).
During our separation and up to now (been over 6 months) I've been trying to get her to come with me for marriage counselling and been attending all sorts of self-development, meditation, etc, to improve on myself and encouraged her to join me so we can work on each other, but has refused to co-operate and she basically shut down and doesn't want to try anymore, although I moved back home as I saw changes in the kids that I didn't like.
So I've been back here home for the last 3 months and during my return, we've been trying and have been intimate a number of times until I had to go in for surgery about 3 weeks ago...
Not long ago I found a copy of her affidavit and was gutted to read how she made me sound like an evil heartless person – ranging from (in my words) a wife and child basher and all sorts of other stories of why the kids aren't close to me. Tonight, my friend informed me, through his soon to be ex that my wife has amended the affidavit as she was going hard for a 80/20 or something similar to those figures…
She has seen a lawyer during our separation which I have not as I clinched onto hope….the hope has failed and I feel now she will serve the papers before xmas so I have no time to organize my self
I've just noticed she has received a pay rise and that she has been withdrawing money to match my income, perhaps avoiding the fact she may not be eligible for whatever she's seeking for and playing with the sums by making payments back to her work. She also cross fired me for not lodging my last financial tax statement…somethings not adding up and im blind to what she may be up to...an agenda perhaps
I was also informed that she has some agenda in wanting to sell up and is going to invest elsewhere into a larger investment property as she now either has been promoted at work or is now receiving a larger pay slip and doesn't give a s**t in losing it all as she's in a more financially better position than me.
I feel so used and gutted as I have always placed every single dollar into this family and yet I find out she's doing all this behind my back
I'm basically lost and need help from anyone who's been in a similar case and what is the best way to protect myself and not get ripped of any more than what I am about to be and ideally want a fair 50/50 or better for myself....
All accounts are in Joint:
Kids both adults and both are working (in their 20's)
Wife and I working F/T
Wife just received an inheritance
I have bhp shares
I own a Hilux 2012
She has corolla 2012
I have a large super then her
Primary house paid off
Home loan against Investment property & has Tenant
Personal loan
Furniture and general gadgets