WA Proposed temporarily supervised visits

[Hoang Trang]

Kids live with me and spend time with their mother every fortnight on weekends. My son came home saying his mother choked him when she got angry and this was backed up by my daughter who witnessed it. He told the school the next day and they alerted CPS and the police. She was arrested and interviewed but no charges were laid because of insufficient evidence. I am disappointed not because of that but because if the situation were reversed, I'd be sitting in jail and not seeing my kids for along time. Actually I did end up in jail one time for apparently breaching a VRO that was later dropped. She put me through hell for along time.
My son does not feel safe, hasn't seen his mother for 2 months since this ordeal started and doesn't want to spend time with her. Can I only allow supervised visit in the meantime until she completes mums and dads forever and some form of anger management program. She absolutely hates me and very hostile which is not helping the children.
CPS told me to reassure my son that it is safe and not to be scared despite my son constant telling me he is. Feel let down by the system, them and the family courts. Double standards because I am the father who has custody.

 

[sammy01]

how old is the boy? Look without court orders then you're doing nothing wrong. If mum wants to spend time with the kid then let her organise it. Has mum applied to court?

 

[Hoang Trang]

how old is the boy? Look without court orders then you're doing nothing wrong. If mum wants to spend time with the kid then let her organise it. Has mum applied to court?

Sorry forgot to mention there are court orders she has them every second weekend. My son is 8 yrs old. I haven't heard from her in 2 months since since this all happened. I might just wait until she ask to spend time with the kids then propose the arrangements and see what she says? She's a nut job and needs to learn how to control her anger and put our differences aside and co parent.

 

[sammy01]

Oh hey - Hoang - Yep I remember you. FFS. Mate.... Change your phone number, run, move, hide.
You don't have to make her see the kids. Not your job. Yep you do need to comply, with the orders BUT if after 2 months she hasn't made an effort, then slowly walk away and hope she disappears into the distance.

My ex still spends time with the kids sometimes. The eldest has decided that she doesn't want to have a relationship with her mum. Sad, sure but no worse than having a relationship with a parent when that parent is emotionally abusive.

 

[457Visafraud]

I agree avoid her and if she make any complaint, you have a record that she was mean to the child so you worries for his safety.

 

[Hoang Trang]

Oh hey - Hoang - Yep I remember you. FFS. Mate.... Change your phone number, run, move, hide.
You don't have to make her see the kids. Not your job. Yep you do need to comply, with the orders BUT if after 2 months she hasn't made an effort, then slowly walk away and hope she disappears into the distance.

My ex still spends time with the kids sometimes. The eldest has decided that she doesn't want to have a relationship with her mum. Sad, sure but no worse than having a relationship with a parent when that parent is emotionally

She emailed today saying now that the police have finished their investigation she wants to see the kids. I have a chat with my son and explained that he still has to go over there even if he doesn't like
It but if he doesn't feel safe then it's a different story. She said technically I am breaching the court orders by preventing her which it true.

I replied and said I am seeking legal advice on supervised visits on a interim bases until she completes a credible anger management and mums and dads forever. Let's wait and see what she says.

 

[sammy01]

Options.
1. Resume visits. Look, she has been put on notice. Might be enough for her to pull her head in.
2. Maintain your current stance. Hmm. My thinking - If you do this, you risk more court time. BUT I reckon you could play a bit of brinkmanship... IF she applies to court, throw in the towel and resume visits asap.
3. Fight to the death. Go to court. But this is problematic given the cops didn't purse it.

 

[Hoang Trang]

Options.
1. Resume visits. Look, she has been put on notice. Might be enough for her to pull her head in.
2. Maintain your current stance. Hmm. My thinking - If you do this, you risk more court time. BUT I reckon you could play a bit of brinkmanship... IF she applies to court, throw in the towel and resume visits asap.
3. Fight to the death. Go to court. But this is problematic given the cops didn't purse it.

I've tried to be amicable and given her every opportunity to co parent. But been dragged through the mud, sent to jail and almost gone bankrupt. I'm surprised I've managed to keep my head above water this whole time. Call me a asshole but I'm going to be a prick and do nothing unless court gets involved

 

[457Visafraud]

I've tried to be amicable and given her every opportunity to co parent. But been dragged through the mud, sent to jail and almost gone bankrupt. I'm surprised I've managed to keep my head above water this whole time. Call me a asshole but I'm going to be a prick and do nothing unless court gets involved

Do nothing, let the witch deal with the court, she has a bad record so who going to believe her?
But the problem is we are in Australia where angry feminists rule the whole family violence system, 90% of the time judges are female, duty lawyers are ALWAYS female.
Personal experience with a fake family violence complaint, the system is biased to accomplish female's goal which is to punish men.

 

[sammy01]

Hoang, I remember a bit of your backstory.... Nope not being a prick. Mate, my eldest has made the decision that spending time with mum causes her grief. I accept isn't a healthy relationship and I accept that my kid feels it is not in her best interest to spend time with mum. Again, sadly, but that is the situation and it is all constructed by the ex.
457visa- Look I'm not sure if the system is sexist. I am sure that some people with do what ever it takes regardless of the ethics and the DV industry definately supports BS avo's and trumped up protection.