I have recently started dating a friend I've know for years, but only recently gotten close to. I was aware of his situation, but never asked the ins and outs of it, as I felt it was something too sensitive to talk about.
Since we have been together, I've learnt about his situation, and I can't help but think my partner is receiving poor legal advice. I would love a second opinion or just some advice.
My partner separated from his partner almost 2 years, and when I say separated, she left in the middle of the night with their two boys. They had been having problems in the lead up to her leaving, so they were sleeping in different rooms, so he wasn't aware they had left.
She moved to an unknown location, had their children booked into another school and cut all contact with him.
She put a DVO against him, when no physical violence occurred, apart from a push in the heat of an argument once, in the 13 years together they spent together.
After false hope of getting back together from his ex, and advice from his lawyer, he didn't contest the DVO, as he was told if he didn't, he could have it withdrawn by his ex once 'everything blew over'.
Everything didn't blow over. He wasn't able to contact the children because of the DVO, and their whereabouts unknown. He didn't speak to them or see them for almost 8 months.
She repeatedly contacted him via text and phone, despite her having a DVO against him, continually providing false hope. In retrospect, I can see she was stringing him along so he would not to take her to court.
They own a house together on a farm, and he continued to reside on the property and pay the mortgage.
After 6 months, she rang and asked him to move out the house so her and the boys could move in, which he willingly did, as he wanted the boys to live in their family home again.
After her living there awhile, she allowed my partner to see the boys, providing he did the maintenance that was needed on the farm. Once the maintenance was completed, she stopped allowing him to see them and cut all contact again after Fathers Day 2016, except sending photos of the boys on his birthday.
This whole time, my partner did the right thing by the DVO, and living in a small country town, sometimes running into his ex and children was inevitable, and he had to turn and walk the other way, which I know would of killed him.
He only lived 10 minutes away from them the whole time.
In the past 6 weeks, he received knews that his sons hadn't been attending school. After 8 weeks of the boys not being school he went out to the farm, to find the house empty.
His ex has cut all contact with all her friends and family, changed her phone number and nobody knows where they have gone.
In this time, his ex had changed their children's schools continually. In almost 2 years, they have changed schools 5 times to our knowledge. It's sad knowing these boys have no stability or family support, so thankfully my partner has started the legal process.
He has started with mediation, and was given a certificate for Court as she didn't bother responding to emails ect.
He has been preparing all his documents with the help and advice of his lawyer, and will also be having a barrister at court.
But what my concern is, after reading into the legalities a little, I have read about recovery orders and location orders.
I mentioned these to my partner, his lawyer has not spoken about these to him.
My partner has been told that his children need a child psychologist to assess them, and based on the outcome, they will know whether or not they have to go to court.
This doesn't make sense to me. To me, these boys have been taken from my partner, their family (from both sides of the family) and their home. Shouldn't his lawyer be pushing for a recovery order or at the least, a location order?
Since we have been together, I've learnt about his situation, and I can't help but think my partner is receiving poor legal advice. I would love a second opinion or just some advice.
My partner separated from his partner almost 2 years, and when I say separated, she left in the middle of the night with their two boys. They had been having problems in the lead up to her leaving, so they were sleeping in different rooms, so he wasn't aware they had left.
She moved to an unknown location, had their children booked into another school and cut all contact with him.
She put a DVO against him, when no physical violence occurred, apart from a push in the heat of an argument once, in the 13 years together they spent together.
After false hope of getting back together from his ex, and advice from his lawyer, he didn't contest the DVO, as he was told if he didn't, he could have it withdrawn by his ex once 'everything blew over'.
Everything didn't blow over. He wasn't able to contact the children because of the DVO, and their whereabouts unknown. He didn't speak to them or see them for almost 8 months.
She repeatedly contacted him via text and phone, despite her having a DVO against him, continually providing false hope. In retrospect, I can see she was stringing him along so he would not to take her to court.
They own a house together on a farm, and he continued to reside on the property and pay the mortgage.
After 6 months, she rang and asked him to move out the house so her and the boys could move in, which he willingly did, as he wanted the boys to live in their family home again.
After her living there awhile, she allowed my partner to see the boys, providing he did the maintenance that was needed on the farm. Once the maintenance was completed, she stopped allowing him to see them and cut all contact again after Fathers Day 2016, except sending photos of the boys on his birthday.
This whole time, my partner did the right thing by the DVO, and living in a small country town, sometimes running into his ex and children was inevitable, and he had to turn and walk the other way, which I know would of killed him.
He only lived 10 minutes away from them the whole time.
In the past 6 weeks, he received knews that his sons hadn't been attending school. After 8 weeks of the boys not being school he went out to the farm, to find the house empty.
His ex has cut all contact with all her friends and family, changed her phone number and nobody knows where they have gone.
In this time, his ex had changed their children's schools continually. In almost 2 years, they have changed schools 5 times to our knowledge. It's sad knowing these boys have no stability or family support, so thankfully my partner has started the legal process.
He has started with mediation, and was given a certificate for Court as she didn't bother responding to emails ect.
He has been preparing all his documents with the help and advice of his lawyer, and will also be having a barrister at court.
But what my concern is, after reading into the legalities a little, I have read about recovery orders and location orders.
I mentioned these to my partner, his lawyer has not spoken about these to him.
My partner has been told that his children need a child psychologist to assess them, and based on the outcome, they will know whether or not they have to go to court.
This doesn't make sense to me. To me, these boys have been taken from my partner, their family (from both sides of the family) and their home. Shouldn't his lawyer be pushing for a recovery order or at the least, a location order?
