VIC Family Law - Step-parent's Rights Over Non-biological Child?

[YDMFWS]

My partner of 10 years is threatening to kick me out and keep my son from me.

I have been awarded sole custody of my 11-year-old son. My partner and I have never married nor have I signed any adoption or parenting orders giving her rights. My partner is not my son's biological parent. Can she take him from me under family law?

 

[sammy01]

So there are a few answers and they contradict.

So a step parent does have some rights in family law if the step mum wanted to have that fight. It is impossible to foresee the outcome from here because we don't have all the details. But no, that doesn't mean she could take him away without your consent.

If the relationship is going to end. It might be prudent to leave with your son. Keep reading...

So that is family law.

But there is something in criminal law that you need to be mindful about. Don't argue with her. See if she goes to the police and can make a case with stuff all evidence, that you've been threatening her, then she could get an AVO / DVO (apprehended violence order) to have you removed from the house and have her and your son protected under the order. That happens when relationships end and there is lots of conflict. So be careful...

Cheers

 

[YDMFWS]

She has already said to a friend that she's going to accuse me of assaulting him and has him on side coz she lets him play fortnight at 11 and I won't. She seems to think DHS are going to help her

Also thanks for your reply

 

[sammy01]

So is the relationship over? Sorry to be blunt, but look if it is time to move on, then you really want to start making plans in that general direction.

Mate a few strategic decisions here. Maybe now might be time to lose a fight or two. Let the kid play fortnight - Poor form in my world. As a parent and a step parent me and my partner have a pretty solid understanding that while I'm grateful for the help, she is the step mum. I am the boss when it comes to my kids... But my point is this. If the kid is playing the game, well maybe let that one go for the minute.

Cheers

 

[YDMFWS]

Yeah i can understand what your saying. I dont even know she wont even speak to me but stil under the same roof atm. She has issues with the way i do things so she abuses me for it and then does the same herself and yet im the bad one

 

[YDMFWS]

She would also have a hard time finding any evidence of me abusing her as it's not something I do. I don't even yell at her.

 

[Atticus]

I have been awarded sole custody of my 11-year-old son.

Do you have an actual stamped court order naming you as having sole parental responsibility & that your son lives exclusively with you?... If so it may be worth you checking with a solicitor to find out how that may be used to your advantage should she follow through with her threat...

A court order naming you has effect until it is set aside, amended or the boy turns 18..

 

[YDMFWS]

Yes i do when i fought my ex for custody. But she thinks that dhs will overule those papers

 

[YDMFWS]

Im happy to end the relationship. My son wants to stay with her but my fear is that i leave him here with her and she says i abandoned him

 

[sammy01]

So does your son want to stay with her?
How would you like this to pan out? TO be fair to the kid, he has lived with step-mum for 10 years. Sure you and her might have fallen outa love, but the kid hasn't?

I don't think DHS will help her much. Your bigger problem is the child. But at age 11 he doesn't get much say because he is a child. The courts look at age and maturity. So there is no set age where they say a kid can choose. They're more likely to listen to a 17 yr old than an 11 yr old.

Look you're best getting an agreement from her. But unless it is stamped by the courts it doesn't mean much. I'm sure you're familiar with this having already been through it...

What do you think is best for the kid? Mate by the sound of things he has already lost his bio mum. If he gets on well with step mum I reckon you try and find a compromise. But never allow the kid to choose. He cant choose to go to school or go to the dentist - he doesn't get to choose this one either.