QLD Family Court - Do I Intervene in the Proceedings?

[Nana Panna]

Hi.

My son and his partner slip up a few months ago and she is being very unreasonable with regards to allowing access to his 11-month-old daughter. We are a very close family and my granddaughter spent a lot of time with me, including overnights and now I am just cut out by the mother.

Anyway, long story short...my son is putting in his family court application for orders, but due to his work pattern, he won't always be able to facilitate visitation between me and my granddaughter. Therefore we need some additional orders that allow my granddaughter to spend some time with me outside of his visitation. However, I am not sure how to go about doing this. His lawyer has said I can do this.

By way of joining your proceedings once they are commenced and in particular files : -

1. An Application in a Case and supporting Affidavit applying to i ntervene in your proceedings in which she seeks Orders, amongst other things that she: -

a. Wishes to be a party to and/or intervene in the proceedings; and

b. Any Orders with respect to S.

She can submit those documents once we have filed your Application and it has a Court return date.

Alternatively , we can list your mother as a party to the proceeding now, in which case she will need to file a Response and an Affidavit. Either way, she needs to file a Response and/or an Application with a supporting Affidavit.

So what is best to be a party to the proceeding or apply to intervene? What does either mean? Is one better than the other? I have tried to work this out but I am at a bit of a loss.

Thankful for any help given.

 

[AllForHer]

Either of those options is acceptable.

Provided the Court allows it, both will simply make you a respondent to the proceedings.

My view is that it may be best to wait until your son’s initiating application has been filed and a return date set down before requesting leave to intervene.

Adding a respondent can complicate matters exponentially and at this stage, you don’t know how the mother will respond - legal advice may compel her to be more willing to facilitate time once proceedings are on foot and she finds herself under the scrutiny of the Court.

If I may, what kind of time are you seeking with the child?

 

[Nana Panna]

Thanks for your reply. My son works a rolling shift of 4 on and 4 off. Therefore he can go three weeks when he works the weekends and will see his daughter midweek. Both me and my husband work full time and live an hours drive from our son. So basically we would like to see our granddaughter at least once a fortnight.

When our son is seeing her at the weekend, we will join in with that. We only want her to give us a little extra when it will mean our granddaughter will go a month without any contact with us. We feel that is too long for a small child as we will constantly be strangers to her. Historically we saw her very week when her parents were together but I don't expect this to happen now. On the additional grandparent visits I will be happy initially with 4 hours per visit.

So can I ask how to I apply to intervene in the proceedings? I can see there is a form to complete and I need to put an affidavit in. What should go in this affidavit? I have so many questions. We can't really afford to pay a lawyer as we are helping to pay our son's legal costs.

Thanks

 

[AllForHer]

Well, first, you should know that nobody on this forum gives legal advice. We just provide some information and guidance based on our own knowledge and experience.

In your affidavit, you need to show why the orders you're seeking are in the best interests of the child. A good starting point is to provide details about how often the child spent time with you prior to separation, how often she has spent time with you following separation, how often she spent overnight time with you without the parents present, etc.

What you want to avoid is any criticism against the parents. Family law isn't about slinging mud, it's about moving forward and doing what's best for the child, which is ensuring she has the opportunity to enjoy a meaningful relationship with those people who are significant to her, including her mother. The Court needs to feel confident that you're not going to badmouth mum in front of the child, so best to avoid badmouthing her in your affidavit.

In my view, I don't think the Court will make orders for the child to spend time with you on a fortnightly basis. The legislation places the benefit of a meaningful relationship with the child's parents as one of the primary considerations in determining what orders to make in the best interests of the child, and I think there's argument to be made that fortnightly time with the grandparents will limit the child's capacity to enjoy a meaningful relationship with the parents. You'd essentially be asking the Court to force the parents to organise their lives around the child's relationship with you, when the child's relationship with them should be higher priority.

Additionally, many parents barely get fortnightly time with their kids, and grandparents are considered secondary to parents. I can't say I'm aware of any cases in which grandparents have been granted fortnightly time with a grandchild, except where the grandchild has lived with them for an extended period of time.

I think one sleepover during the months when your son is working and you wouldn't otherwise see the child is more realistic.

 

[Nana Panna]

Thanks. Totally agree and I wouldn’t dream of badmouthing her mother. No matter what I feel S will love and adore her and I will always respect that. In fact I had a mother daughter relationship with her Mum so I am very sad it has come to this.

I do have lots of texts from her Mum telling me how wonderful I am for S, DNA now she wants me to spend more time with. Her and have her overnight more. Will none of that make any difference. I saw S every week when her parents were together. The mum doesn’t work.

I suppose I am wanting S to be able to have a close relationship that she did have with me prior to her parents separating. Seems so unfair to S that she has to lose that. Her mum is from overseas and had no family here at all. I want to offer support to both S and her Mum. It is difficult raising a child alone. I know I have done it.

 

[nat 2015]

Thanks. Totally agree and I wouldn’t dream of badmouthing her mother. No matter what I feel Sophia will love and adore her and I will always respect that. In fact I had a mother daughter relationship with her Mum so I am very sad it has come to this.

I do have lots of texts from her Mum telling me how wonderful I am for Sophia DNA now she wants me to spend more time with. Her and have her overnight more. Will none of that make any difference. I saw Sophia every week when her parents were together. He Mum doesn’t work. I suppose I am wanting Sophia to be able to have to close relationship that she did have with me prior to her parents separating. Seems so unfair to Sophia that she has to lose that. Her mum is from overseas and had no family here at all. I want to offer support to both Sophia and her Mum. It is difficult raising a child alone. I know I have done it.

Oh you sound so lovely, I wish my ex's mother would put her hate aside for me for our children.