NSW Domestic violence case

[Ashn]

hi, I have been married for 1.5 yrs now. My wife and I had a turbulent relationship and I suffered a lot of mental harassment and financial stress. She sought police help after we had an argument where I touched on her shoulder. She accused me of domestic violence and I accepted that I had touched her shoulder at the police station, not knowing that would amount to assault. She has taken an avo against me and the case is pending for final hearing. She has also applied for pr based on the avo. I have spent a fortune on her and have worked hard all these years to give her all comforts but she never appreciated it and made my life miserable by picking up fights on smallest of issues. Now she has victimised herself at the cost of my career and reputation though she herself has abused me in past but I never made that an issue. Will she get a pr on the basis of the avo and whT will hPpen to me? I have had an excellent spotless career so far and have no criminal record against me,

 

[sammy01]

Have you been charged with assault?
Do you have kids from the relationship?
Look she might still get PR - but big deal. Not your problem.

So if you have not been charged with assault, but have an interim AVO, my suggestion is this. When you attend court accept the AVO without admission. This will not cause you to have a criminal record and unless you work in security / police.

So I'm a teacher, my ex took an avo out against me... It had no impact on my employment / career.. Actually, it was the best thing she ever did. WHY? well like you my relationship was abusive. We would fight, I would run away, I would come back and be told it was all my fault... This trashed my self esteem. She took an avo out on me... I was not allowed to speak to her. GREAT - no more emotional abuse. In fact no more contact at all. GREAT. It did not seem like it at the time, but the avo broke the cycle, of arguments, manipulations and abuse.

 

[Ashn]

Thanks for your reply.
I accepted in the police station that I had touched her shoulder and the police said it qualifies as common assault . They charged me of common assault. I had to give a recorded statement accepting the touch on shoulder. I was too shocked to think right at that time.I spent few hours in lock and took lawyer advice who asked me to plead guilty. The case is for final hearing next week. She has moved out of house . I don't have any children with her. The police after hearing my side of story felt sorry for me but they have charged me of common assault. I work in health industry and have really worked hard to make a good name for mysel f. I am devastated by all that has happened .

Have you been charged with assault?
Do you have kids from the relationship?
Look she might still get PR - but big deal. Not your problem.

So if you have not been charged with assault, but have an interim AVO, my suggestion is this. When you attend court accept the AVO without admission. This will not cause you to have a criminal record and unless you work in security / police.

So I'm a teacher, my ex took an avo out against me... It had no impact on my employment / career.. Actually, it was the best thing she ever did. WHY? well like you my relationship was abusive. We would fight, I would run away, I would come back and be told it was all my fault... This trashed my self esteem. She took an avo out on me... I was not allowed to speak to her. GREAT - no more emotional abuse. In fact no more contact at all. GREAT. It did not seem like it at the time, but the avo broke the cycle, of arguments, manipulations and abuse.

 

[sammy01]

ok so lets hope there is never a NEXT TIME - but never ever talk to the cops... They were nice to you to get the information to screw you over.... You admitted to touching her - she claims you touched her shoulder and it was violent... They got you.

BUT - your question is more about impact on employment... Look even an assault conviction is not likely to have any impact on employment. If you're in a union check with them...

Now as far as the avo goes, well if she has left your home GREAT - you have had a huge win.... In my case, I was paying the mortgage on a house I was not allowed to enter because of the AVO... So you can imagine the financial stress of paying a mortgage while the ex lives rent free and I also had to find a place to rent so I had a roof over my head... Mate even if she stays in Australia it doesn't matter - she is outa your hair...