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NSW Child Taught Foul Language by Sister-in-Law - Child Abuse?

Discussion in 'Family Law Forum' started by Vinnie, 13 January 2016.

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  1. Vinnie

    Vinnie Well-Known Member

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    When my baby is kept by my spouse, my spouse's sister takes care of the baby and would always teach the baby bad languages and foul words about the other parent and her grandparents.

    Is it considered as child abuse under Family Law?

    Thanks.
     
  2. Jace

    Jace Well-Known Member

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    This would need confirmation and clarification by someone with more knowledge than myself, but from my understanding (and recent advice from my solicitor), it is classified as child abuse if either parent (or third party) is denigrating the other parent to/or in the presence of the child.

    I'm currently in the process of re-writing a parenting order for my initiating application, and including this as a clause, that neither parent (or third party) may denigrate the other parent to or in the presence of the child because I am suspicious that she is "coaching" him to dislike me.
     
  3. sammy01

    sammy01 Well-Known Member

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    Jace - when I was in your situation, I had something worded in the orders to try to stop that sort of behaviour. Guess what? It didn't work. My ex continued to denigrate me to the kids. Really nasty stuff. And just because there was something in the orders that says she wasn't allowed to say bad stuff, it didn't stop her.

    Short version - pick your battles.
     
  4. sammy01

    sammy01 Well-Known Member

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    Mate, one more thing.

    You're gonna stuff up your chances of seeing your kid by wasting your time proving to the magistrate that the mum is a twat. The mum is abusing the kid by not letting the kid see you, the mum is abusing the kid by teaching him bad language, the mum is blah, blah, blah...

    BTW I'm sure she is a twat. But even twats are allowed to be parents. And there is nothing in family law about being a twat.

    But in family law, it does say something about parents working together.

    "The willingness and ability of each parent to facilitate and encourage a close and continuing relationship between the child and the other parent."

    Parenting cases - the best interest of the child - Federal Circuit Court of Australia

    So you need to show you're willing to encourage a relationship between the mum and the kid. You don't need to show that mum is a twat. Now, I reckon you're gonna read that link and say yes - but what about the bit about abuse and neglect?

    Mate, neglect and abuse are ciggy burns on the kids' skins, sexually assaulting kids. What you're talking about doesn't even come close.

    So focus on showing how you're prepared to be a great dad and that you're prepared to work co-operatively with the mum. If the mum is a twat the mum will prove the to the magistrate that all by herself.

    Seriously, what do you hope to achieve in wasting your money to go to court just to show the magistrate that the mum is a twat? All it will do is show that you and the mum can't co-parent. So what then? The kid stays with mum and you see kid in holidays if you're lucky....

    So start changing your thinking. You should be thinking about what she is gonna say about you. So for example, "Jace can't cook and all he has ever done is buy take-away food, and the kid shouldn't spend much time with dad because he can't teach healthy eating habits". So your answer needs to be, "Yep, never been much of a cook, but I've just finished a night course called 'Cooking Basics'. Here is the certificate your honour. Oh and btw I'm cooking up a Mexican Chicken Bake for dinner tonight, your honour, I'll bring ya some left overs for lunch."

    So the questions you need to be asking here should be, what should I be doing to maximise my time with the kid? What should I say / do when in a conversation with a court report writer? Because when you go see the court report writer and if you spend your whole time bagging out the ex, you are shooting yourself in the foot.

    Don't believe me?

    OK - I had an avo against me, wasn't even allowed to go near the kids' schools, etc. The ex wanted sole parental responsibility. BTW, my ex is a twat too. My 3 kids now live with me and spend about 9 weeks a year with their mum.
     
    Nick Handson likes this.

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