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NSW AVO - Is a Warning Considered a Breach?

Discussion in 'Family Law Forum' started by jonnybravo, 8 January 2016.

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  1. jonnybravo

    jonnybravo Member

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    Hi. My wife has put an AVO on me for harassing her with texts and making threats.

    Last night the police knocked on my door and issued a warning as they have said that I have driven past her house multiple times and done a U-turn in the front of her house. I denied that this occurred.

    My AVO is currently an Interim AVO and I have a court date due in late February.

    I was hoping that time would heal and the AVO would be dropped on this court date.

    Will the warning be on file for the AVO hearing and will it have any impact on the outcome? Is a warning considered a breach?
     
  2. sammy01

    sammy01 Well-Known Member

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    Ok, so you've been spoken to. That is all, it is a warning. Heed the warning. If you challenge the AVO, the warning will be communicated to the magistrate.

    The AVO is very unlikely to be dropped, not unless the ex requests it and probably then it will only be amended. You can have an AVO and theoretically continue living with someone - depending on the terms of the AVO...

    So I'm gonna be blunt - she took an AVO against you. Not good, since then she has gone to the cops and accused you of continuing the threatening behaviour. Even worse. And you're hoping the thing is gonna get dropped? You are kidding yourself.

    You could contest the AVO but I'll give you the same advice 2 different solicitors gave me when I was in your situation. Their advice: accept the terms of the AVO without admission and save my money to use to fight her in family court for access to kids and for the division of assets. In short, you could spend thousands on solicitors to contest the AVO. You might win.... You might not...or accept the terms of the AVO and move on.

    Just out of interest, did you drive past her house? Just once, maybe? Let's assume you did. Stupid.

    Let's assume you didn't. That shows she is out to get you. So do you really think she's gonna ask for the thing to be dropped?

    Let me tell ya a story. A woman takes AVO. She calls him from a payphone inviting him to meet up for a drink but she doesn't show. She calls again from a payphone saying she's gonna be late. He waits. She calls again from a payphone and tells him she has changed her mind and wants to meet at a different place. He goes there hoping to talk to his wife about saving their marriage - he is getting frustrated. Still no show.

    He then texts and calls her mobile and leaves a message. He has breached the AVO and she goes to the cops. She trapped him. He goes to jail for the weekend until the cops can get him in front of a magistrate. Mate, blokes go to jail for months for breaching AVO's.

    Please start making smart moves. Mate, I was called to the cop shop more than once when I had an AVO against me. I live in a small town, so it was inevitable that I would bump into her at some point. So she pulls into the petrol station while I'm filling up. She gets out of the car. I say hello to her and wave at the kids. She calls the cops. They were good about it but I still had to deal with all that crap.

    So like I said, be smart...
     
  3. jonnybravo

    jonnybravo Member

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    Thank, Sammy, Blunt is good.

    No, I did not drive past her house. I live nearby and in the same town. I was just coming home from seeing my daughter from another relationship.
     
  4. jonnybravo

    jonnybravo Member

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    I accept the terms of the AVO. I have no intentions of going near her or contesting it but the spotlight on Domestic Violence has instilled more fear into her than there needs to be. I am 44 years old and have never been in trouble in my life and have never had to get a solicitor, ever. My solicitor is on leave at the moment. I am dealing with my own demons and doing everything I can to sort myself out and this makes it so much harder.

    I'm going to start taking different routes now to see my daughter and her mother as they are supporting me through this whole process which is ridiculous, but her seeing me driving past is obviously instilling fear in her. I am grieving more than anything and hurt, but whoever has her ear is obviously making her more scared than she needs to be. AVO's seriously are a necessity but I think the process needs to be reviewed and assessments done on both parties by a mediator to determine risk, etc. They are way too easy to make and very one sided.

    Cheers, mate
     
  5. sammy01

    sammy01 Well-Known Member

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    Mate, I agree. Back in the day, it was innocent until proven guilty. I believe my ex provoked me purely to get the response she needed in order to go to the cops. I got my hands on her police statement and she uses phrases that really are verbatim from the legislation about feeling intimidated.

    So my lessons in life from the experience:
    1. Good - I would not want to be with someone like that - good riddance.
    2. Good - The AVO well and truly ended our marriage. She made it perfectly clear that the gloves are off...

    Like you, I had nothing more than a speeding fine and found the whole thing crushing, but if you do the right thing, it will be a distant memory. In fact, I wouldn't even bother spending money on solicitors for the AVO; just stand in front on the magistrate and say you accept the terms of the AVO without admission...

    Just out of interest - do you have kids with this woman??

    And yes - steer clear of her street. If she calls you / texts you do not respond.

    Mate, my ex called me, I answered...dumb! I told her that I'm not allowed to talk to her, so why call?

    Her response? "That is right, you're not allowed to talk, so start listening..."

    No thanks, so I hung up.

    Mate, good luck with it.
     
  6. jonnybravo

    jonnybravo Member

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    No kids mate, luckily. To be honest, I never want to see her ever again. And yes, I will ride it out until it goes away. The stigma associated with it makes me feel like a monster and a criminal, I hate it. 44 Years Old and this is the first time I have ever been to court. :(

    Thanks for the help.

    Cheers
     

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